Lost my son Tuesday

Oh my goodness Gazrok. I'm so deeply sorry and saddened to read this.

I miss our old chats.

My best to you and your family in this difficult time.

a reply to: Gazrok

It has been said that those spirits that are already enlightened are the ones whom struggle to be comfortable in the skin they inhabit, this cycle, due to the madness of this planet, the sick system that has trapped and enslaved us and wears down our true sense of being, our true reason for existence, into robotic monotony.

The world is a sick place. The very fact we have to pay to live on the planet we are born on, born into debt, forced to conform to a system of employment that almost certainly guarantees that if you aren't a sociopath you aren't going to be successful, financially. And the one's whom try escape this system without escaping their body are met with resistance (you can't simply decide to live off the land, nowadays you can't even collect rainwater, living off-the-grid is generally met with poor attitudes from your local council/gov). Working in your profession towards the true betterment of mankind, while showing no desire to earn megaprofits from your work, will guarantee you get sidelined, replaced with someone more malleable.....and with dollar signs in their eyes. The sickening wars waged by our governments on the less fortunate people of Earth for resources. The sick individuals and groups that sacrifice the innocence of children for their own personal desires. Yes, this place is indeed very very sick.

I am sorry for the sadness your family is experiencing, and my condolences for your personal loss. Just consider that, if he was never comfortable in his skin, on this earth, at this point in time, then he is more than likely in a better place right now, free from the bonds that weighed on his true being.

I'm so sorry Gazrok , just wish I had the right words to say. Please take good care of yourself.

a reply to: Gazrok

So sorry for your loss.

Deepest sympathies to you and your family.

So sorry to hear.

When the time is right there are many to talk to on here that have lost as well. While our situations are never fully the same, neither are our journeys afterwords, it can help to have others to talk to.

Regards to you and yours.

No words...

Just our love.

a reply to: Gazrok

As A father myself i cant even imagine what you and your family are going through.

So sorry to hear of this and a sincere condolence.

My condolences Gazrok.Come spring I will plant a tree in my City for you and your son to celebrate his life and to memorialise your love for him.Fear not only time stands between those who love each other...and time is but a fleeting tickle of the wind upon our hearts...

a reply to: Gazrok

A childhood friend I grew up with took his own life. We played out in the street, or in the woods, like boys do. He was just like the rest of the boys in the street. He was in his 20's when he passed. No-one seen it coming. He had 4 brothers and were a close family.

Even though we hadn't seen each other for years, it still left an empty feeling. Almost 20 years later, I still have thoughts about our childhood and the fun we had.

I cant imagine the pain if it was my son.

Peace be with you.

a reply to: Gazrok

I have no words...as a father this is my worst nightmare. My sincerest condolences to you and your family.

Peace

Thank you all. I see the Mods had to remove the fund links. Weird, just didn't realize that would apply. In any case, if anyone wishes, just message me for info.

We're getting through it. At least got the immediate affairs handled for it, but still trying to plan a service, and see what's within our means. It just doesn't seem real most moments. Probably because we haven't even been home much since Tue, just me in and out to feed the animals and all.

This whole thing just seems like some weird nightmare.

a reply to: Gazrok

Thank you for the update Gazrok!
I can only imagine your pain at this time. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

a reply to: Gazrok

We lost my 19 year old stepson in a motorcyle accident in March this year so understand a little of what you and your family are going through right now.

All the cliches apply and words mean little but my thoughts are with you and all concerned and will just say that you never get over something like this but you do learn to adapt and adjust with time.

a reply to: Gazrok

My heart breaks for you as a parent. My child has suffered with some mental issues and depression and although we seem to have come to the other side I know that it could all rear it's ugly head again with just one small set back. Vigilance at all times still may not be enough.
I am also dealing with the aftermath of a suicide, it's been almost two months and every time I think I am becoming stronger I feel myself slip back down and have to re focus and try to let the guilt go.
The suicide came out of nowhere and none of us had any idea really what he was going through not that we could have changed his mind I think.
I hope you and your loved ones are able to heal and although it can take some time I have to believe it can be done.

a reply to: Gazrok



Oh Gazrok I'm so sorry to hear about your son. I can't imagine what you and your family are going through.

I wish you and your family lots of love right now.

originally posted by: TNMockingbird
a reply to: Gazrok

My heart breaks for you as a parent. My child has suffered with some mental issues and depression and although we seem to have come to the other side I know that it could all rear it's ugly head again with just one small set back. Vigilance at all times still may not be enough.
I am also dealing with the aftermath of a suicide, it's been almost two months and every time I think I am becoming stronger I feel myself slip back down and have to re focus and try to let the guilt go.
The suicide came out of nowhere and none of us had any idea really what he was going through not that we could have changed his mind I think.
I hope you and your loved ones are able to heal and although it can take some time I have to believe it can be done.

Yes, this is almost EXACTLY like our situation. I think these troubled folks become adept at hiding it, so you think there's progress, but really, it's gotten worse. If I could give any caution to those in similar situations, it would be this.

a reply to: Gazrok

My deepest sympathy.

I lost my 7yr old Son to leukaemia after a long battle.

It was horrible but expected and I knew that we did all that we could to keep him alive to the very end.

You had no such chance to help.
That must weigh heavily on your soul.

Not your fault Gaz ... I'm sure you were there for him had he only reached out.

Not your fault.

Hope you can move forward with no hate or regret, only memories of good times.

😔

a reply to: Gazrok

I'm so very sorry.

a reply to: Gazrok


I’m so sorry. Praying for your family.

Not your fault Gaz ... I'm sure you were there for him had he only reached out.

I think that's what is so hard. He did, and we answered. Months ago, he ran off to GA to commit suicide. We called the police (and him of course), and they found him on a bridge. He went into a program. Weeks later, they had to let him out.

He had nowhere to go, but of course, we gladly told him he could come home, and we'd get help, and we did. He seemed so much better, but it's obvious now it was an act. He was just telling folks what he thought they wanted to hear.

We made sure he had no stressors. Didn't have to worry about rent, a job, anything. Just to get better. He was excited about going into Job Corps (or at least pretended he was). It's all just like a weird, bad, horrible dream.