Today I found out my step father has lung cancer he's 57

Today I found out my step father has lung cancer he's 57. I've known him for 25 years. He's been a smoker and a drinker since I've known him. We've had our differences over the years but over all I think he's a good guy. I had to stop by over there today to pick something up. I totally lost it on the way over. I had to stop in a parking lot and get myself together. I was afraid I was going to break down in tears so I just grabbed what I needed to and left. My mom is pretty much in denial over it. And on top of all of this I just found out my step sister has a crystal meth problem. Everyone is the family was oblivious to it. She ended up and jail for selling it. My step sisters husband just shot himself. I'm worried my step dad might do the same thing. His mother just had two strokes.

I made a thread a few weeks ago about my own perils of quitting smoking. I'm 41 years old and I saw my grandfather die at 59 from throat cancer. I made it 12 days cold turkey with out a smoke. The cravings drove me crazy. Even after 12 days every 20 minutes I was having smoke craving attacks. I was eating out of control. I couldn't take it so I went back to smoking. I'm starting to wonder if I'm doomed to die from this. I had a major drug problem earlier in my life but nothing compares to the addiction of cigarettes.

Sorry to hear about your stepfather having lung cancer. Some people have a higher risk of cancer from smoking, others don't. It would be hard to determine which you are, one that has the genetics or one that doesn't.

A friend of mine is just going in for a test to find out if he has lung cancer, there can be jell like spots that resemble cancer in X-rays so he needs to get an MRI.

a reply to: wantsome

Something that's of no use, but hopefully some comfort: A hug for you, and best hopes for your Dad's recovery.

Something that should be of use and great peace of mind: Get the benefits of nicotine without the carcinogens: Vape!

a reply to: wantsome

Gawd awful. So sorry.

Re cigarettes....vape. It's not perfect, but at least it will get you moving in the right direction.

Good luck. I hope things work out. Sounds like you have more than any one person should have to handle.

a reply to: wantsome

I'm so sorry to hear about your family struggles.. I've had my own fair share this year, losing my 35 year old brother unexpectedly you need to try to take care of yourself.

I have severe addictions to harder drugs for years and had to find healthy addictions like going to the gym and studying history, etc. to replace them. I still have my vices but finding a way to redirect that energy saved my life, without a doubt.

Wishing you & your family nothing but love and positivity - I'm here for you if you need to think anything through or get ideas on how to try to quit the nicotine. *Respect

a reply to: wantsome

Here is something you might want to look into.

www.cancertutor.com...

a reply to: wantsome

You are having a rough go right now, lots of bad news. Cancer is scary and there is little I can say other than hang in there. I hope the best for you and your family.

a reply to: wantsome

Anytime someone under 18 puts a cigarette to their lips they will most likely be addicted for the rest of their shortened life:

Sorry for all the bad news. As far as smoking goes, as someone else said, try vaping. Far less dangerous. And you can get different levels of nicotine. I started pretty high at 18mg, and am now down to 6. Soon 3 and then 0. Had a sore throat a few weeks ago and couldn't vape...and had absolutely NO withdrawl symptoms. Plus it's waaayyy cheaper. I try to go for e juice that does not have artificial colors and flavors as well. They are more expensive, but totally worth it in my opinion. Shoot me a message if you want more info. Good luck. Hang in there.

So sorry for you and your loved ones but as the old cliche goes... live every day as if it was the last one in your life.

Unfortunately these days... and as from day 1 of conception a human being is already pre-programmed to die.

May it be by genetics or the crap that each and every generation has ingested over the years since the industrial revolution THAT cancer was already born.

Funny enough last night I was pondering at the fact that I am only 51 years old and that taking into consideration all that poo my mother ingested during the 60s and the heavy stuff I have also ingested over the years does not give me long to live.

My son is 18 and since he was conceived we have done our best to make sure our future generation is cancer free.

Only time will tell!

Warmest

Lags

a reply to: wantsome

Oh sh*t, how awful! All of it! You have my compassion and sympathy - all of your family does.

My husbands dad died early of throat cancer - he was a drinker and smoker - so my husband has always been very aware of the dangers. Nobody in my family actually died as a result of such habits, even though there's been a lot of drinking, smoking and drug use in the family.... so I tend to be less aware.

With all the recent doomsday talk, a part of me keeps kind of hoping it was real, because then I'd have an excuse to buy some really expensive wine and a carton of cigarettes! (I don't smoke anymore, and I only drink occasionally).
Damned things are evil slave drivers. Wishing the world would be doomed to destruction so I can have a cigarette?? Insane.

I have a brother who became a methhead. It is so heartbreaking.

Life is as hard as it is beautiful. I can't think of anything to say that would help you right now. I can only send you lots of love and hopes that you all get through somehow. Love each other. Be honest with each other. Have courage.
Praying for you!

As I suggested in the post above yours... :

Live every day as if it was the last one...

Enjoy what we have with those we love or appreciate...

Warmest

Lags

a reply to: Bluesma

My heart goes out to you-so much sadness at once and you don't know where to go with it.

Just remember you are not alone-these bodies don't last forever-practically every person you look at is experiencing much sadness themselves so we are in this together-try to remember that and let your heart be open to all-if you let others into your sadness they will usually share theirs and we can hold on to each other to get through the bad times.

Here's for better days ahead-there will come a time for music and dancing ahead-hang on.

Far out. I'm very sorry for all the illness and bad times you and your family are going through. Sending love strength and support to you and your family.

As far as giving up smoking, good luck and keep trying. My father is 3 or four years clean after needing surgery and the surgeon sayin he will not operate if he doesn't give up, 4 years later still no surgery, dam waiting lists. He smoked for 52 years by the way.

I too am a heavy smokerand lack the will power to give it up and my mind tells me I enjoy it. I financially want to give up as ciggies are so expensive in my country that it has created a black market for violently stolen ciggies regularly.

I have just started studying to be an early childhood educator and have to work in a kindergarten 2 days a week (2 weeks full time at the mo as my 1st practicum) and there is no way I can smoke at the kindy and can't leave the property. For the first 2 weeks I wore patches and didn't think about them, I ran out of patches and can't afford any now I think about them in my breaks and in the last half hour before I finish. I am quite proud and also amazed at myself.

Some advise from someone who has only tried to give up 3 times in 25 years but never succeeded is keep busy, drink lots of water, try healthy snacks when craving like carrot sticks or celery, few nuts. Look into other herbs to use to stop cravings vitamins and minerals, a good gut cleanse and replenish of good gut bacteria. Ginger and other lung cleansing foods. Meditation. Take up knitting or crochet. Try reading Allen Carr Easy Way To Give Up Smoking, they say if you finish the book you give up. That's all I can think of for now.

Anyway sorry to blab. And once again sorry for the hard times you and your family are having.

Kia Kaha stand tall and strong like a kauri tree.

i echo all the warm and caring sentiments others have already expressed.

i used to be a smoker but quit cold turkey in 2012 and havent looked back. I still smoke but not cigs

the point i wanted to make is this. If you asked most people if they want to die almost all of them would say no. And yet, here i am drinking Coca Cola right now, obviously not healthy.

here is the thing: our ancestors had vices too.....many of the same ones...drinking, smoking, gambling, sexing etc....but somehow i dont think they were dying from those things like we are now. Whats changed? Ill tell you what i thinks changed.....its the people who are producing the products our vices demand.

cigarettes are a perversion of the tobacco plant. Just try to find some "pure tobacco" cigarettes anywhere that have zero additives and paper without any chemical content. Can you do it?

I personally think our vices have been weaponized beyond whatever natural danger or unhealthful attributes they possessed since time immemorial. In other words....its not the vice per se thats killing anyone....its the chemically laden, synthetic products that have replaced what we always used to take from nature.

What did they do? make producing your own alcohol and tobacco illegal....now you get to buy it from DOW chemical or whomever.

This was done to us by someone else.....not us. We are just carrying out the genetic mandate of our ancestors who did the same things.

a reply to: wantsome

There, see? I told you to go out and get the Patch or go back to smoking. Don't fret, quitting smoking is a process, took two years for me, relapsing and quitting, to finally stop completely.

But I couldn't of done it without the Patch. Go reread your thread I'm there somewhere, or PM me, whatever.

What I find kind of strange, is there are alternative methods out in this world that cures certain types of cancer, but when one introduces these alternative methods to someone with cancer, they seem to have given up on life and won't even consider giving it a try. Only one person that I know, out of at least a dozen people that I have introduced these 2 simple alternative cures gave it a try....and guess what, it worked for them. Here they are. Get busy living, or get busy dying.

www.cancertutor.com...
www.cancertutor.com...

Pladuim

I lost both parents to cancer, mother was colon, father was a blood cancer,
It is a nasty ugly process.

I also have never understood the draw of cigarettes. They smell and taste nasty, you don't get a buzz, they are nothing but a waste of money.
That coupled with knowing how harmful they are just makes it harder to understand.

I'm so sorry. I send love to you.

My family recently went through the awful trauma of discovering that my brother-in-law had brain cancer, and he died 4 months later. He died after complications from damage the tumor did, after it was removed. I say this to give you hope because there are treatments these days that are more effective at removing tumors than in the past. If you want any info or suggestions on where and what to research please message me.

But mainly I wanted to say this: find someone for YOU who can be strong for you when you need it....maybe a friend or someone not in the family. I related so much to you saying you had to pull over so as not to lose it when you got to your step-father'so house. I was totally blessed to be able to take time off and go be with my sister when stuff was going down. I was so grateful to get to be there for her and my brother-in-law. But the first time I flew down, and had been there about a week, my brother was able to make it down also. The moment he walked in the door, I ran to him and lost it. I didn't realize until that moment how much I was trying to be strong for my sister and how much I also needed a support. It helped so much, because I could lean on him, and get back to my (our) sister refreshed and stronger.

Don't forget about YOU....you'll be a better strength for your step father if you have someone who is there for you too.

Hugs and love coming your way....

a reply to: wantsome

Sorry to hear about your step dad.

Not much I can say, except that years ago...my dad was diagnosed with lung cancer...and he survived it.