What deep thinkers we men are

reply to post by cody599



In order for the pain to be comparable (or worse) than childbirth, you'd have to get kicked in the peanuts every 2-3 minutes for 12 hours non-stop. And then after 12 hours, you'd have to get kicked in the peanuts with combat boots (in order to intensify it just a little more) every 45-60 seconds for about another 2-3 hours until the final climax of squeezing out a small watermelon from your derriere for another 30-60 minutes.

By the time you're squeezing out that watermelon (ripping you wide open from stem to stern), you'll be grateful for the downgrade of pain you feel from a few silly little stitches you have to get when the doctor sews you back together again.


Then, and only then, can it even be close in comparison.

Now go make me a sammich.





And after you finish making my sammich, I think you should have a beer whilst you re-contemplate this new deep thought I just put in your head.



... and you're welcome for the new visuals.

reply to post by cody599


My husband thinks you are a genius, and also commented that you may have drank too much beer since that question has never entered his mind!

My personal opinion? Men are a bunch of wussies who have no real ability to deal with any sort of pain or suffering... Women the other hand, are the ones who have the real stones!!






......darn... now my husband is threatening to spank me for writing this! Its all your fault Cody!

reply to post by OpinionatedB


You can thank me later

Cody

reply to post by CranialSponge


Thank you for your informative and graphic reply,

I have discussed this issue at length with my brethren, we have come to 2 conclusions.

1: Owing to a lack of volunteers we'll have to agree to disagree with your premise.

2: What would you like on your manwhich ?

Cody

reply to post by cody599


Thanks, Cody! I love the humor

I think a lot of people have men and women's thought processes backwards.

reply to post by cody599


ROFL...

I have to agree with hubby... you are a genius Cody!

reply to post by cody599


You're poisoning yourself with that alcohol! It calcifies your pineal gland, and it's addicting. There is NO way it can cause deep thinking. Maybe emotional thinking, but not deep.

Did you share your wisdom with your wife?

My wife kicked me in the Tenders after the first one and said "THERE! that will NEVER happen again RIGHT?"


Hard to do anything but nod when you are the floor rolling in pain, so I would be careful and use tact...

Puresk1lls
reply to post by cody599

 

You're poisoning yourself with that alcohol! It calcifies your pineal gland, and it's addicting. There is NO way it can cause deep thinking. Maybe emotional thinking, but not deep.

Thank you for your very touching concern about my health,

Did you notice this is posted in the jokes, puns and pranks forum ?

Excuse me whilst I have this scotch and contemplate your wise words

Cody

reply to post by abeverage


Indeed, I did share this wisdom with my good lady wife.

A very understanding lady indeed, and she found a rather novel place for her hairbrush to reside.

I'm seeing the doctor in the morning to have it removed.

But she didn't actually verbally disagree, I think she was hinting about a Christmas present, though for the life of I can't think what it could be.

Cody

cody599
Hi Guys

What deep thinkers men are...

Finally I thought about an age old question: Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the nuts? Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the nuts.



Well, after another beer, and some heavy deductive thinking, I have come up with the answer to that question.

Getting kicked in the nuts is more painful than having a baby; and here is the reason for my conclusion. A year or so after giving birth, a woman will often say, "It might be nice to have another child." On the other hand, you never hear a guy say, "You know, I think I would like another kick in the nuts." I rest my case.

No need to thank me, it's a public information service

Time for another beer.
Cody

Wow. Yeah... Go ahead an tell your wife this. I'm sure she'll totally get it... Oh. And you might want to have on some good running shoes, a bag packed and waiting by the door and a buddy waiting for you with a car running in the driveway... but sure, you just go with that!

peace,
AB


PS: After going through two natural child births, I will refer you back to this...
www.abovetopsecret.com...


ETA - I see you did tell her! Hmmm. Only a hairbrush?? LOL! (Seriously, I don't advocate violence towards my spouse. If it weren't for the baby-love hormones, the human species would have died out a LONG time ago!!)

reply to post by CranialSponge
not illusory delivered

OpinionatedB
reply to post by cody599

 

ROFL...

I have to agree with hubby... you are a genius Cody!

I just showed Mrs C your post

I'll let you know when she finishes laughing

Cody

My theory is the following after having received nut punts on a few occasions during my younger years :

When recieving a size 42 boot in the nads forcing them very rapidly up into your throat in a matter of a millisecond, i would compare this to a flash pregnancy of 12 week old twins!



Kindest respects

Rodinus

reply to post by cody599


I can honestly say without doubt the most painful experience I have been through, involved having a rather large piece tattooed spanning from hip to hip, at one point this piece drops down to about 1cm above where my manhood starts. The vibrations from the gun literally felt like I was having my old fella tattooed. Not a pleasant way to spend 5 hours !




Namaste
~sacri~

reply to post by Sacri


Pics or it didn't happen

*Crosses legs*

Cody

A few deep thoughts I've had: (since we're sharing)

Where do you find a dog with no legs?

Where ever you left it, dummy!

If the plural of mouse is mice, and goose is geese, does that mean that people live in hice, and meese live in Canada? (house and moose, dummy!)

If the government cares enough about my dental health to put fluoride in my water, why can't they just out and out pay for my god-damned dentist? It would a) stop the conspiracy theories and shut people up about calcified what-cha-ma-callits and b) make me go to the dentist more than once a century, so when I show up in court for assaulting government officials, my breath won't stink in front of the All-Mighty Judge.

reply to post by cody599


Reading your post really made me giggle, i ask my husband what he's thinking about all the time, and its so frustrating when he says ''nothing'', and i know it annoys him when i ask because i'm pretty persistent!

I think its definitely a question that is mainly asked by women, were just too nosy, haha

thank you for making me laugh

Minnie1985
reply to post by cody599

 

Reading your post really made me giggle, i ask my husband what he's thinking about all the time, and its so frustrating when he says ''nothing'', and i know it annoys him when i ask because i'm pretty persistent!

I think its definitely a question that is mainly asked by women, were just too nosy, haha

thank you for making me laugh

I'd recommend you read this a threads I wrote a while ago Never ask what your man is thinking

Cody