Another teen suicide! What is going on?!

Originally posted by Raxoxane
I get absolutely incensed when i hear of teenage suicides-because so many cases are caused by BULLYING.Maybe the UN should make themselves useful and launch a global campaign against BULLYING-so these pieces of feces who make other(usually decent,good) childrens' lives a misery to the point where they commit suicide can be shown up for what they are.

And i do not for one second fall for the line:"But they bully because of unhappy circumstances" Bull#e!!!!!!!!!!

I was an abused child,a bitterly unhappy,extremely angry child and teen.I felt alienated from the rest of the human race since i was a snotnosed lil kid-and yet i NEVER,NEVER ,not even once,took my misery out on another.I shall never go into details of my abuse here,or on any site,but believe me-if i could bear that much hostility and sadness in me,feelings of being worth NOTHING,disconnect from the entire species-and refrain from taking it out on other kids-BLOODYWELL ANYONE CAN.ANY AND EVERY ONE.
I say this because i would never expect from others what i can or will not do myself-really,being in pain yourself is NO excuse to take it out on other kids-and i felt this way being basically raised without a father,and by an extremely abusive,mentally disturbed mother and her two adult sons,a drug addict and a violent alcoholic.THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR BULLYING.

edit on 22-3-2013 by Raxoxane because: typo

bullying has been around forever and will be forever, instead of trying to stop it with money and laws we should teach our kids how to deal with it. Thats what im doing with my kids, they are still young but as they get older and the bullying gets to a higher level they will know exactly how to deal with it. you cant blame teen suicide on bully's, you can only blame it on the ones that make the decision to end there own life. and if u want to get deep into it, the parents of those that commit suicide. But even then, sometimes suicide has nothing to do with up bringing, only a final decision. and not anybody elses decision but, the person that murdered themselves. Please dont pass the buck, like everyone else in this world does, it makes us weak as a society.

Originally posted by Invariance

The bullying in her town was so bad last year that 8 young people made a suicide pact and succeeded.

Where were all the dads in these situations?

My son had minor bullying on the bus and I went directly to the principal. He brought the kids in his office the next day read them the riot act and called the parents to say their kids could lose bus privileges. It ended very quickly.

Another case that ended quickly was when the parents visited the parents of the bully to talk about it…awareness at higher levels work, but it seems most let their kids struggle it out for themselves.

reply to post by Hope4peace


If the body and the brain are at completely different stages there is always a danger of feeling
isolated/alone.

Boys are starting Puberty at about 6mo.- 2 yrs. earlier than they had a few decades ago, with
girls showing signs of puberty at 7 or 8 yrs old

If the emotional development is at a 8 or 9 year old level instead of a 10 or 11 yr. olds
emotional development, it may very be too much to handle with an earlier physiological change.

All parents need to be very aware of this, as selfesteem/depression/anger can be a serious problem
with hormones on the run.
The "puberty brain" is very difficult to live with and to deal with, for child and parent alike.

Teenage years are one of the most difficult phases of human life.

reply to post by Xtrozero


I can't account for all the fathers for the boys in the suicide pact, but one boy in particular was a policeman's son, another's father was a drinker... one had a dad that was honorable and honest in my opinion.

In the case of my acquaintance's daughter, the parents were notified of one incident. The school was stone-walling, the police said it was not illegal to be an a-hole, even though there was clear evidence of harassment. I'm thinking it was more of a "how to treat a new comer" mentality in a small town.

She talked to me a number of times, it took over a year for even the school to start paying attention. But that was only after the superintendent got involved.

~shrugs~ even adults get bullied at work! We did a bad thing when we passed laws not allowing us to fight back!

reply to post by DocHolidaze

Hey DH,yes i do also teach my kids to deal with it,should it happen.For example,my oldest girl has encountered physical bullying only once in primary school,and i have to say that she handled it very effectively.There is and always will be a lot of dislike and animosity between her and the other girl,but since the incident where she was attacked and struck back hard all those years ago,it was limited to dirty looks.It's not in my kids' nature to hurt others,physically or with words,they are kind people, but they have been taught that if some one should physically attack them,to strike back twice as hard.Bullies are cowards,so they pick the targets less likely to retaliate,and she made it very clear that she Would retaliate,and hard.

I get what you say about weakening the species,and to an extent i agree-this world is a brutal jungle already,and as it gets progressively worse each day,we hardly need a SHTF scenario-the breakdown of the traditional family unit and the assault on our moral values by the media,Hollywood,the music industry,violent pc games,the glorification of that+those that are shallow,materialistic,psychotically greedy,narcissistic,selfcentered, idiotic and violent,the terrible examples set by those in government,bad or non-existent/absentee parenting etc are all contributing to a society in freefall over an abyss.One needs to be strong,if not physically,more importantly mentally and psychologically.One needs a great deal of good old-fashioned common sense.

However,the success,and i may go out on a limb here,but the very survival of a society and maybe even a species,depends on how it treats the vulnerable and defenceless-children and the wise ones-the elderly.

You cannot have only warriors-you also need the nurturers,the thinkers,the inventors.Very often these are the "nerdy" types,the much more sensitive and empathic types,the "softies"-who are the often the exact type of child picked on by bullies.I'm sure you get the drift.

Thing is,not every emotionally or psychologically more fragile child Has at least one parent or care-giver who is there to build them up through sensible advice and guidance-and through just being there for them as support- sometimes it is not through bad parenting.Often the parent(s) loves the child very much,but due to having but to work long hours to support a family,including said child,they cannot physically be there to do so.Or because of other circumstances beyond their control.Some children find it very hard to reach out-my youngest daughter is not a person who likes to talk about her feelings,thank goodness she is a very strong child,physically and mentally.But to get something out of her is like pulling teeth-teeth set in gums of superglue.If she had to have been unhappy about something in her life,it would have been incredibly hard and time-consuming to get her to open up about it-and i have lots of time.What about all those kids like her,but ones whose parents,though loving their kids just as much as i do mine-just do not have the time because of work,especially in the case of single parents,or sickly parents?

Bullying is passing the buck too,imo,and more so.Its forcing others to share in one's misery,although the recipient of the abuse and thus part of one's misery is completely innocent and unable to help one to a better place.It's basically saying:"I am hurting/angry with life cus i got such a crappy deal-but by God,i an NOT going to suffer alone-i will make sure others are in pain too".
Often,let us be brutally honest,its just because of meanness and effed-upness,with absence of troubles at home/other issues that cause pain and anger,as "mitigating" factor.Individuals like these usually contribute nothing to society-nothing positive anyway,in the long run.They just breed and raise kids with the same level of effed-upness,the same crappy values and attitudes-they are the takers that never contribute anything constructive,nothing uplifting.

I agree that as parents we are the first line of defence,and the guides who should build up and educate our children to deal with the fact of life that are bullies and bullying/harassment of various types.But not all targeted kids have the luxury of parents that can do this,often through circumstances entirely beyond the parents' control-or sadly,parents with skewed priorities.I feel more should be done,to protect the kids more likely to be targeted,the "softies" who usually grow up as decent law-abiding,productive members of society.The rubbish who bully and hound and harass SHOULD have the chance to be educated that this lousy behavior shows weak character,that it's not "cool',it only makes one a prize asshole despised by many-and they should be educated while still young-before MTV gets to tell them its cool to be a gangbanger,or violent games tell them its cool to kill em all.

www.afsp.org...
www.huffingtonpost.co.uk...

I believe the suicide rate may be getting higher due to expectations of people that is shown on media,it is so far from a reality that most people can achieve, the media often shows the arrogant mean selfish people to be the great successful ones; link that with the fact that we all have such unnatural lives now, money being seemingly the only thing that matters and lack of it can be believed to show what a failure you are
the four people I have known personally who have taken there own life have all been male, all have hanged themselves all at lowest time of there lives, the one common theme to all four was that life was not worth the struggle the hopelessness of the future and the lack of hope that things might get better in fact I believe all four thought things would only get worse

reply to post by astra001uk

That is where it would be helpful for young children and young people to have the guidance of a sensible adult who can see life in perspective.You know,my youngest daughter was away from home,and asked me to watch the finale of "America's Next Top Model" to tell her who won.I find it rather painful to watch our VUZU channel,well i find watching TV rather painful,period,but of course i did her the favour.This show is obviously about the modelling industry,which is pointless and shallow enough,but as a slight redeeming grace is the fact that the winners for the most part seems to be the more decent,mentally stable,hardworking girls-the "nice" girls,if you will.But the ads were for shows like "Real housewives of Beverley Hills
and These Wives,Those Wives, and Whatever family -"Values"-yes really-they would couple the word "values' with whatever shallow,materialistic,idiotic,narcissistic bunch of INGRATES decides to plague themselves onto our TV screens,in the (unfortunately Not misguided) belief that some would be interested in the disgusting,nauseating ways they choose to live their lives.

These people have everything.EVERYTHING.Well,except decency,self-respect and brain cells.And this is what is dished up for our children as something to aspire to.God help us all.

And i thank God for myself and my husband-somewhere down in Africa are three wonderful,kind, decent, sensible children with proper values and morals who has 2 parents to act as guides and counter-measures to this sick indoctrination.Children who will never behave in a way that make others want to puke just from observing them going about their day-at least these abominable shows about total wastes of oxygen tells me something positive-my life counted for something.

When I was 14 in middle school I saw a friend of mine bullying a kid. I told him to cut it out and leave the kid alone. 4 years later in my senior year the kid that was being bullied came up to me and thanked me. He said I had no clue how bad he was being harrassed. He said he had been bullied for years and that I made his life a lot better. The bully never bothered him again.

Honestly, the world has changed in so many ways since the 80's, and not for the better. Even though we have made remarkable advances in technology since the 80's, does that make life easier? I think not, I think that technology is whats causing our society to crumble to the ground. I've observed kids at my high school go from the most social people I know, to the most anti-social people I have ever seen due to getting the new iphone, online gaming, etc. I myself have fell victim to the technological induced anti-socialism.