Dreams from my (dying) father.

I can't imagine how you are processing all this and staying strong too, but you sound like you have accepted it and are preparing for the passage. Your post is honorable and kind and he sounds like a father anyone would be proud to have. I hope you are able to stay at his side as much as possible. I like what phroziac said too about proudly walking in his footsteps, and for what it's worth, I have always perceived your nature here as kind, giving and strong, so take some comfort in how he positively shaped who you are, and affected those he came in contact with. I hope there is minimum suffering and that your family and friends have made their peace with him. It's gotta be tough ATA, but thanks for sharing this and know that many here care.

Blessings and strength friend,
spec

What a wonderful blessing to have such a wonderful father all those years. And you do him proud by walking in his footsteps my friend. That is all we can do to honor a person that meant so much to so many. What a great legacy . Powerful stuff. I watched my father die . He wasn't like your dad but he did have some good qualities. I just hope my kids see me as the best I can be and want to follow in those footsteps as well. That is what i want. The world to be a better place because of me and my children.. Awesome. Condolences dear. I feel for you. Now it is your turn to carry on that legacy.

reply to post by Asktheanimals


I am very sorry to hear about your Father having cancer. He sounds like a very good man who has honor.

My Dad passed away 3 years ago, He was the same kind of man. Best wishes. ~$heopleNation

reply to post by Asktheanimals

I became a father for the first time a month ago. I hope I can be half the dad your father was to you and your family. I will use your post as inspiration to raise my son the best way I can.

Good luck to you and your family.

I'm terribly sorry to hear you're family is going through this. Saying goodbye is such a terribly hard thing to do, especially to the man you always knew would be there for you.

I lost my daddy back in February. He'd had to have his leg amputated in January due to circulation problems and he just never recovered. We thought he'd pull through but I guess the years and pain had just worn him down.

Lately he'd been slipping mentally (repeating himself and not remembering things) so I guess the writing was on the wall. The last time I saw him, he was getting ready to go to the physical therapy room down the hall. I left the hospital with many tears in my eyes, because deep down I could see he wasn't going to go home.

I got the call a week later saying he had pneumonia and was slipping fast. It's a 5 hour drive and he was gone when I got there. I didn't get a chance to tell him what I wanted to tell him.

Anyway, I just want each of you who read my words to think about what I'm saying and if you have a chance, tell your parents how much you love them. Don't let them go into what awaits us all, without telling them what you know you want to tell them. I surely wish I could talk to my dad right now, I miss him so much.

Asktheanimals I wish there was something I could tell you to make it more easy, but there isn't. Just do your best to help your mom along. I'm sure with what she's been through she is a tough lady, but just being there for her will help her more than you can imagine.

reply to post by Asktheanimals


Great tribute, great man...this world doesn't have many people like this anymore, and they are leaving us at a fast pace...I dread to think what will happen to us when the real knowledge and wisdom is gone with our elders.

"Inna Lillahi wa inna ilaihi raji'un"

Surely we belong to Allah and to Him shall we return. (2:156)

My grandfather was also a product of the depression, and he was a great man. He was also very helpful and resourceful, a hard worker and a doctor who owned his own practice in a time when there was freedom to help people and get to know your patients in that profession.

He also got lung cancer, and this moved to his brain. I stopped by his house once, and he was fine - we went to church together and he seemed better than ever, but then a month later he was dead. It moved very fast.

Wow, he sounds incredible. I'm sorry for your loss not to mention the loss to this planet. I'm sure he has a wonderful place in whatever afterlife awaits us. Best wishes...

You honor your Father. Gods speed. I understand .

reply to post by Asktheanimals


God Bless. I wish you and your loved ones all the best on the next step in dealing with the horible experience of the next step of life/death.

I myself am going through the process of losing my father slowly to alzheimers @ 67...and it's horrible. The man who once nurtured, protected and taught me everything I need to know to sustain life independantly, is now the equivelant of a baby... and that's putting it nicely. It's just a shame to seem them suffer and literally waste away.

I honestly feel your pain.

reply to post by Asktheanimals

It occurred to me that everything that is wrong with the world today my father is the antithesis of; were there more people of his character we wouldn't be having so many problems. His life gives me pause to reflect on the kind of person I'd like to be and I was hoping others would feel the same after reading about him.

Well said.

Especially the traits of selflessness for its own sake. And shrugging ones shoulders about it as though , "It were nothin'". I am privileged to hear you speak of him so. You honor his name.

reply to post by Revealation


You have it far worse than I do friend and I''m truly sorry to hear that. At least my Dad still recognizes and acknowledges us even if that's all he can do it's far better than having your Dad decline in such a slow fashion as what alzheimers will do. That must be very painful to experience.
Strength to you and your family in the days ahead. May your father find peace at last.

ATA

reply to post by Asktheanimals


At times in life, there are moments of beauty and pain. This is one such moment.

I wish no grief or suffering were ever to visit kind souls, or anyone for that matter. So it is difficult to compose such a simple message, as many have done so movingly here.

"Let me help." is the shortest way to say it. If and when you should need it, rest assured that my soul sings of comfort and peace for you and yours.

I see so frequently now that I am older, in what ways we are all so much alike. I hear the celebration of your father's life and I know that as he follows his path to where we cannot follow, we all hurt. Our world needs good and kind people. We need them to prosper, and grow; to feel true human pride, the things that makes us all better individuals, just by witnessing it.

But life seems to be syncopated with loss, and struggle at times; I suspect that your father will never be gone, and now more than ever, as his son clearly shares his vision.

Many of us are no strangers to witnessing the pain of a loved one. Many of us never had a moment to prepare, others wish they never had a moment to prepare. In the end, it's about your path, not mine.

I will be here. Let me help.

reply to post by Maxmars


Thank you Max.
You really do have a gift with words.

My father passed peacefully at home today (9-02-2012) surrounded by his entire immediate family.
My sincere thanks to everyone for their prayers and support along the journey.

reply to post by Asktheanimals


I am so sorry, ATA.....my thoughts and prayers for you and your family.


and a [[HUG]] for you....

reply to post by Asktheanimals


My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

He is no longer suffering and in a better place. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family at this difficult time. May you all find the strength and courage that you need. HUGS!!!

I should have added this long ago but even 20 years before my father passed I noticed how he seemed to catch every last bug that went around. He wrote it off as just bad luck and teaching in a school environment. I sensed even back then something was very wrong.

Trust your intuitions about your loved ones. Had I badgered him a bit (and my mother) they might have diagnosed him much earlier.

I doubt anyone will read this but just in case.