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ADD and ADHD and a new theory
page: 1share:
Warning, this could be a long post as it is a subject, which is very important to me.
The latter half of this Thread opener will be information on a small growing theory in a combination of, science, psychology, and a spiritual movement.
Hello Everyone,
My name is Matthew, aka ADHD sux for me. I suffer from AADD, which is Adult Attention Deficit Disorder. I am a 27 year old Caucasion Man. I have struggled my enitre life, I have never fit in well with standard society. In light of the last 9 years of my life, I had come to the conclusion by some self-diagnosis that I had ADHD or ADD.
I had always wondered why I was scatterbrained, whereas others could delve into tedious low stimuli tasks and complete them. My mind would not allow for repetition without changing rapid stimuli. In the face of tedium, regardless of my very determined attempts to focus on the task at hand, my mind would wander. Many times I would only realize this after somone else had pointed this out to me, by ways of either yelling, or getting my attention brought to it.
This has always been the way my mind functioned. On the plus side, stimuli that has been rapid and changeable keeps my interest, television, great conversation with give and take, and video-games.
I was an average student at school, sometimes below average. Often I understood the topic far better than the children around me, but in this advantage my mind would slip, and I lose focus on other important details of the lesson, and that is where my grades would slip.
Other things that I am able to focus on are things which require my imagination, which I have an ease to harness. I am a creative writer, poet,
have classical singing skills, small time actor, and occasional stand up comedian. My mind is very sharp, I do not miss much. I pick up unspoken vibes and changes in peoples manner often before others notice. This has made me a fantastic peace keeper and peer dipolamat. I have exceeded in areas of customer service in jobs where this was required. I have a fantastic knack for saying the thing which soothes an angry individual.
On the Downside on the topic of Jobs, I have lost, or quit every job I have ever had since I started working 8 years ago. Either I would be fired for my lack of focus, or I would be so bored with the Job I would quit. This is a very real downside, of what I like to nicname ADD, it is "The Boredom Disease". I have been scolded as to being lazy, when the truth is I work very hard, but it only seems to emerge in things I adore (such as this website). I also don't have the same sense of emergency as others do over trivial things. If something is minor in the grand scheme of things, I don't feel the need for urgency. This has been labeled procrastination, lol.
My mind functions very similar to an ever changing TV on Channel surf. It shifts quickly, however I multi-task well, and in its constant shifting I learn many, many things that others would not. In fact, I am a trivia guru. I also have learned to greet in 33 languages. Yes, I can say Good Day, How are you, Hello, In 33 languages. The constantly changing mind has made me unquenchable for knowledge. I love to learn, but it may seem the opposite. I love to learn things which seem interesting to me, and me alone.
In realizing this, I noticed that I am quite incompatible with the rigidty of structure necessary to function and conform, and play by the rules of todays society, like getting a job and being able to support myself. I haven't been able to. I am disabled in this way.
I decided to finally attend a research study for ADHD, they did diagnose me as having it. On the Study, they wanted to see if proscribing a time relased ritalin medicine would prove as "effective" as it had in treating children. I am an adult, this study was for adults who had ADHD. They Started me on a drug called (Concerta). They told me that this drug should allow me to over time be able to focus more, and be less scatter brained. This drug manipulate's NeuroEpinephrine, and Seratonin levels, which in something ADHD or ADD are out of balance or low.
Over the course of the study, they adjusted my dosage based on body weight, and low and behold I started to notice I would become more engrossed in things. Something I didn't notice immeadiately also was my increased agitation levels, nervousness, and anxiety.
A few weeks go by, and my ability to focus seems a miracle of modern medicine, and that's when the full blown anxiety attacks started...
I first noticed it in the waiting room at the research facility. It was filled with a group of about 6 very typical ADHD childern, all playing, all loud, all inquisitve of the world around them. I started sweating, their little angelic voices took on a shrill grating sound, they were running around knocking things over banging toys on toys. I could barely contain myself, but at that very moment I yelled SHUT THE HELL UP. Obviously everyone was taken aback, and I later after feeling quite justified at the time, realized what an A$$hole I was.
The Dr. saw me promptly...
Typical, how are you feeling, how is your focus, hmm I heard you had an outburst in the waiting room. Why do you feel you did that, blah, blah blah.
He asked me if I still wanted to be part of the study, and suggested I lower my doage. I wanted so badly to cure my being different, I want so much to be just like everyone else, I want to keep a job, dammit I should be married, and have a child on the way, a home, weekend getaways with the family. The typical dream, that all of the normal people seem to have.
So I held on, and kept doing the study...
It didn't take long for me to realize these changes in my personality were becoming semi permanent. I lost a lot of passion for the things I enjoyed. I avoided talking to people, I don't fully understand why. I just wanted to be alone. I also was having bouts of anxiety attacks more or less 2-4 hours after my medication, like clockwork, and they would last about 4-5 hours straight. Yes 4-5 hour long feelings of imminent Doom! Those of you who have anxiety attacks know what I mean.
All the while I was in the research study I was holding down a job as a database tester, running variables and queries for hours on end. Yeah, that is the most dry subject matter for a job. It's like watching golf zzzzzz....
Well I realized how miserable I was becoming with the obvious side effects of the medicine and thankfully the research study ended within a week of my decision so it was good timing.
Now things are more or less back to "normal" I still can't focus on menial repetitive structured tasks, and I still can't hold down a job. I quit the last one, when I realized just how boring it was. It was that or I wasn't able to do the work anymore, and I was saving myself the embarasment of being fired.
So I am at a loss, I'll never be a 9-5er. I'll never think in the box becuase I was never designed to fit in it. In fact the place I feel I would belong, is a society that encourages creativity, philosophy, and debating. Sadly those 2 times are over, The Renaissance and Ancient Greece, That's where a man's mind alone could make him a living and a life. If only I could be paid to think outside the box, like a one man think tank. Alas I need a high muckety muck college diploma for that, good luck having me able to focus on classes.
I am doomed to be a societal loser, this is not the society for me. OH God hey you! Time Machine Please! Ancient Greece First Class seating?
So after stumbling upon this website through a bumbling Nova-Tech scam, I came across a thread for an new theory called INDIGO CHILDREN.
It is hypothesized by this new line of thought, that People with ADD and ADHD, are the nest stage in human evolution. People geared for handling a world on fast forward. I identify with this very strongly, many of you will rightfully in your opinion's call it BS. I know if I didn't fit this Theory, that I would likely call it BS too. I however can't help but think in the more mundane similarites, they are right. Personally I don't agree with a lot of new-age hooey, but I think I just may in this case.
This is a list of things that Indigo Children are recognized by, Notice the Huge similarity to those who have ADHD.
What is an indigo Child?
As a summary, here are the ten attributes that best describe this new kind of child, the Indigo Child (named by those who predicted it).
They come into the world with a feeling of royalty (and often act like it)
They have a feeling of "deserving to be here," and are surprised when others don't share that.
Self-worth is not a big issue. They often tell the parents "who they are."
They have difficulty with absolute authority (authority without explanation or choice).
They simply will not do certain things; for example, waiting in line is difficult for them.
They get frustrated with systems that are ritually oriented and don't require creative thought.
They often see better ways of doing things, both at home and in school, which makes them seem like "system busters" (nonconforming to any system).
They seem antisocial unless they are with their own kind. If there are no others of like consciousness around them, they often turn inward, feeling like no other human understands them. School is often extremely difficult for them socially.
They will not respond to "guilt" discipline ("Wait till your father gets home and finds out what you did").
They are not shy in letting you know what they need.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
This anothet list of Indigo Child Traits.
INDIGO CHILDREN
Have strong self esteem, connection to source
Know they belong here until they are told otherwise
Have an obvious sense of self
Have difficulty with discipline and authority
Refuse to follow orders or directions
Find it torture to waiting in lines, lack patience
Get frustrated by ritual-oriented systems that require little creativity
Often see better ways of doing thing at home and at school
Are mostly nonconformists
Do not respond to guilt trips, want good reasons
Get bored rather easily with assigned tasks
Are rather creative
Are easily distractible, can do many things at once
Display strong intuition
Have strong empathy for others or NO empathy
Develop abstract thinking very young
Are gifted and/or talented, highly intelligent
Are often identified or suspected of having ADD or ADHD, but can focus when they want to
Are talented daydreamers and visionaries
Have very old, deep, wise looking eyes
Have spiritual intelligence and/or psychic skills
Often express anger outwardly rather than inwardly and may have trouble with rage
Need our support to discover themselves
Are here to change the world - to help us live in greater harmony and peace with one another and to raise the vibration of the planet
___________________________________________________
I would encouarge you all to post your thoughts on this matter, or do a Goodle or Yahoo search on the topic of Indigo Children.
I got this information from these websites.
www.indigochild.com...
www.metagifted.org...
Many Heartfelt thanks to all of you,
-ADHDsux4me
The latter half of this Thread opener will be information on a small growing theory in a combination of, science, psychology, and a spiritual movement.
Hello Everyone,
My name is Matthew, aka ADHD sux for me. I suffer from AADD, which is Adult Attention Deficit Disorder. I am a 27 year old Caucasion Man. I have struggled my enitre life, I have never fit in well with standard society. In light of the last 9 years of my life, I had come to the conclusion by some self-diagnosis that I had ADHD or ADD.
I had always wondered why I was scatterbrained, whereas others could delve into tedious low stimuli tasks and complete them. My mind would not allow for repetition without changing rapid stimuli. In the face of tedium, regardless of my very determined attempts to focus on the task at hand, my mind would wander. Many times I would only realize this after somone else had pointed this out to me, by ways of either yelling, or getting my attention brought to it.
This has always been the way my mind functioned. On the plus side, stimuli that has been rapid and changeable keeps my interest, television, great conversation with give and take, and video-games.
I was an average student at school, sometimes below average. Often I understood the topic far better than the children around me, but in this advantage my mind would slip, and I lose focus on other important details of the lesson, and that is where my grades would slip.
Other things that I am able to focus on are things which require my imagination, which I have an ease to harness. I am a creative writer, poet,
have classical singing skills, small time actor, and occasional stand up comedian. My mind is very sharp, I do not miss much. I pick up unspoken vibes and changes in peoples manner often before others notice. This has made me a fantastic peace keeper and peer dipolamat. I have exceeded in areas of customer service in jobs where this was required. I have a fantastic knack for saying the thing which soothes an angry individual.
On the Downside on the topic of Jobs, I have lost, or quit every job I have ever had since I started working 8 years ago. Either I would be fired for my lack of focus, or I would be so bored with the Job I would quit. This is a very real downside, of what I like to nicname ADD, it is "The Boredom Disease". I have been scolded as to being lazy, when the truth is I work very hard, but it only seems to emerge in things I adore (such as this website). I also don't have the same sense of emergency as others do over trivial things. If something is minor in the grand scheme of things, I don't feel the need for urgency. This has been labeled procrastination, lol.
My mind functions very similar to an ever changing TV on Channel surf. It shifts quickly, however I multi-task well, and in its constant shifting I learn many, many things that others would not. In fact, I am a trivia guru. I also have learned to greet in 33 languages. Yes, I can say Good Day, How are you, Hello, In 33 languages. The constantly changing mind has made me unquenchable for knowledge. I love to learn, but it may seem the opposite. I love to learn things which seem interesting to me, and me alone.
In realizing this, I noticed that I am quite incompatible with the rigidty of structure necessary to function and conform, and play by the rules of todays society, like getting a job and being able to support myself. I haven't been able to. I am disabled in this way.
I decided to finally attend a research study for ADHD, they did diagnose me as having it. On the Study, they wanted to see if proscribing a time relased ritalin medicine would prove as "effective" as it had in treating children. I am an adult, this study was for adults who had ADHD. They Started me on a drug called (Concerta). They told me that this drug should allow me to over time be able to focus more, and be less scatter brained. This drug manipulate's NeuroEpinephrine, and Seratonin levels, which in something ADHD or ADD are out of balance or low.
Over the course of the study, they adjusted my dosage based on body weight, and low and behold I started to notice I would become more engrossed in things. Something I didn't notice immeadiately also was my increased agitation levels, nervousness, and anxiety.
A few weeks go by, and my ability to focus seems a miracle of modern medicine, and that's when the full blown anxiety attacks started...
I first noticed it in the waiting room at the research facility. It was filled with a group of about 6 very typical ADHD childern, all playing, all loud, all inquisitve of the world around them. I started sweating, their little angelic voices took on a shrill grating sound, they were running around knocking things over banging toys on toys. I could barely contain myself, but at that very moment I yelled SHUT THE HELL UP. Obviously everyone was taken aback, and I later after feeling quite justified at the time, realized what an A$$hole I was.
The Dr. saw me promptly...
Typical, how are you feeling, how is your focus, hmm I heard you had an outburst in the waiting room. Why do you feel you did that, blah, blah blah.
He asked me if I still wanted to be part of the study, and suggested I lower my doage. I wanted so badly to cure my being different, I want so much to be just like everyone else, I want to keep a job, dammit I should be married, and have a child on the way, a home, weekend getaways with the family. The typical dream, that all of the normal people seem to have.
So I held on, and kept doing the study...
It didn't take long for me to realize these changes in my personality were becoming semi permanent. I lost a lot of passion for the things I enjoyed. I avoided talking to people, I don't fully understand why. I just wanted to be alone. I also was having bouts of anxiety attacks more or less 2-4 hours after my medication, like clockwork, and they would last about 4-5 hours straight. Yes 4-5 hour long feelings of imminent Doom! Those of you who have anxiety attacks know what I mean.
All the while I was in the research study I was holding down a job as a database tester, running variables and queries for hours on end. Yeah, that is the most dry subject matter for a job. It's like watching golf zzzzzz....
Well I realized how miserable I was becoming with the obvious side effects of the medicine and thankfully the research study ended within a week of my decision so it was good timing.
Now things are more or less back to "normal" I still can't focus on menial repetitive structured tasks, and I still can't hold down a job. I quit the last one, when I realized just how boring it was. It was that or I wasn't able to do the work anymore, and I was saving myself the embarasment of being fired.
So I am at a loss, I'll never be a 9-5er. I'll never think in the box becuase I was never designed to fit in it. In fact the place I feel I would belong, is a society that encourages creativity, philosophy, and debating. Sadly those 2 times are over, The Renaissance and Ancient Greece, That's where a man's mind alone could make him a living and a life. If only I could be paid to think outside the box, like a one man think tank. Alas I need a high muckety muck college diploma for that, good luck having me able to focus on classes.
I am doomed to be a societal loser, this is not the society for me. OH God hey you! Time Machine Please! Ancient Greece First Class seating?
So after stumbling upon this website through a bumbling Nova-Tech scam, I came across a thread for an new theory called INDIGO CHILDREN.
It is hypothesized by this new line of thought, that People with ADD and ADHD, are the nest stage in human evolution. People geared for handling a world on fast forward. I identify with this very strongly, many of you will rightfully in your opinion's call it BS. I know if I didn't fit this Theory, that I would likely call it BS too. I however can't help but think in the more mundane similarites, they are right. Personally I don't agree with a lot of new-age hooey, but I think I just may in this case.
This is a list of things that Indigo Children are recognized by, Notice the Huge similarity to those who have ADHD.
What is an indigo Child?
As a summary, here are the ten attributes that best describe this new kind of child, the Indigo Child (named by those who predicted it).
They come into the world with a feeling of royalty (and often act like it)
They have a feeling of "deserving to be here," and are surprised when others don't share that.
Self-worth is not a big issue. They often tell the parents "who they are."
They have difficulty with absolute authority (authority without explanation or choice).
They simply will not do certain things; for example, waiting in line is difficult for them.
They get frustrated with systems that are ritually oriented and don't require creative thought.
They often see better ways of doing things, both at home and in school, which makes them seem like "system busters" (nonconforming to any system).
They seem antisocial unless they are with their own kind. If there are no others of like consciousness around them, they often turn inward, feeling like no other human understands them. School is often extremely difficult for them socially.
They will not respond to "guilt" discipline ("Wait till your father gets home and finds out what you did").
They are not shy in letting you know what they need.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
This anothet list of Indigo Child Traits.
INDIGO CHILDREN
Have strong self esteem, connection to source
Know they belong here until they are told otherwise
Have an obvious sense of self
Have difficulty with discipline and authority
Refuse to follow orders or directions
Find it torture to waiting in lines, lack patience
Get frustrated by ritual-oriented systems that require little creativity
Often see better ways of doing thing at home and at school
Are mostly nonconformists
Do not respond to guilt trips, want good reasons
Get bored rather easily with assigned tasks
Are rather creative
Are easily distractible, can do many things at once
Display strong intuition
Have strong empathy for others or NO empathy
Develop abstract thinking very young
Are gifted and/or talented, highly intelligent
Are often identified or suspected of having ADD or ADHD, but can focus when they want to
Are talented daydreamers and visionaries
Have very old, deep, wise looking eyes
Have spiritual intelligence and/or psychic skills
Often express anger outwardly rather than inwardly and may have trouble with rage
Need our support to discover themselves
Are here to change the world - to help us live in greater harmony and peace with one another and to raise the vibration of the planet
___________________________________________________
I would encouarge you all to post your thoughts on this matter, or do a Goodle or Yahoo search on the topic of Indigo Children.
I got this information from these websites.
www.indigochild.com...
www.metagifted.org...
Many Heartfelt thanks to all of you,
-ADHDsux4me
I have also been researching indigo chlidren.. although i'm at a loss for words from your post I can relate to most of the things you can experience.
im not as bad as you are though, but indigo is just a label for a certain type of energy/personality of people and more and more of them have the
indigo energies within them. i hope to talk to you more about this. i have to go to sleep now .. non-night
Hahah yeah classic ADHD ;P
HEh i met some 26 year old with ADHD, and well just by being his usual self (thi sis the first time i met him), he was that hypo he nearly tripped over and put his head through a glass window. He wouldn't shut the # up with ihs blabbing absolute bull#, and had to have a bong to calm himself down. HE still wouldn't shut up though with his bs.
Anyways. That Indigo children thing isn't mroe a disorder type. That indiogo children thing is meant to be spiritual, to do with Aurta colours, frequencies, shifting from what ever star sign we were in to Aqueios? People mroe in touch spiritually, witht heir senses, and everything, etc.
HEh i met some 26 year old with ADHD, and well just by being his usual self (thi sis the first time i met him), he was that hypo he nearly tripped over and put his head through a glass window. He wouldn't shut the # up with ihs blabbing absolute bull#, and had to have a bong to calm himself down. HE still wouldn't shut up though with his bs.
Anyways. That Indigo children thing isn't mroe a disorder type. That indiogo children thing is meant to be spiritual, to do with Aurta colours, frequencies, shifting from what ever star sign we were in to Aqueios? People mroe in touch spiritually, witht heir senses, and everything, etc.
Yeah I followed the line of thought, on Indigo Children being a new and "enlightend" group of people. As I stated, I am more of a feet on the gound
guy when it comes to things New Age, I believe in some of the aspects of Indigo, but too much New Age doesn't digest well. I tend to approach things
in a scientific manner. I can understand some of the concepts and alternative religions and things psychic but too much makes me hurl. Kiss a spirit,
Hug a tree, molest my chakras, it's just too fluffy for my liking and too out of touch with reality.
That is not to say on a scientific level, we are only beginning to understand the mind, and energy. So if this whole spiritual thing has credence I'm inclined to agree very moderately. I don't play make believe well on subjects such as this, I relate to Psychic things in a scientific manner. But I am given a bit of hope from this movement in regards to myself. ADHD and this moevement gives me validation that I'm not broken, or completely dysfunctional, and that I may have purpose.
Please continue with your thoughts everyone,
-ADHDsux4me
That is not to say on a scientific level, we are only beginning to understand the mind, and energy. So if this whole spiritual thing has credence I'm inclined to agree very moderately. I don't play make believe well on subjects such as this, I relate to Psychic things in a scientific manner. But I am given a bit of hope from this movement in regards to myself. ADHD and this moevement gives me validation that I'm not broken, or completely dysfunctional, and that I may have purpose.
Please continue with your thoughts everyone,
-ADHDsux4me
First of all, I want to say that I am not attempting to diagnose you in any professional manner. I do have some experience reading case studies and
making diagnoses for the purposes of training and clinical experience in making clinical diagnostic impressions used by MDs to make diagnoses. I am
currently licensed to make diagnoses.
I am going to take your lengthy post at face value and I am going to tell you why I think that AADD may not be the best diagnosis for you and I am going to suggest that you get a second opinion, stop diagnosing yourself, and forget about indigo children until you get some help for your problems in living.
First of all, AADD requires an childhood onset.
Secondly, You have a history of creative accomplishment.
At least elveven of the symptoms listed below must be present for Adult ADHD or AADD:
This criterion fits you, but it does not include the kind of effort and dedication to master the art of classical singing.
But notice this constellation of associated pathologies and behaviors:
Please note the following quote which addresses creativity in those who suffer from Bipolar Disorder, formerly known as Manic Depressive Disorder:
It should be noted that while Adult ADHD or AADD and the manic or hypomanic phases of Bipolar Disorder do have similarities, the drugs used to treat these two disorders are quite different. AADD and ADHD are treated with relatively powerful CNS stimulants, while Bipolar is treated with anti-convulsants, lithium, and SSRIs. (Bipolar medications) (Adult ADHD medications)
This type of mood and behavior would, in my judgement, be consistent with a CNS stimulant:
For people who have ADD, ADHD, AADD and/or Adult ADHD, the effect of a CNS stimulant is quite the opposite.
Compare your symptoms with these criteria for Hypomania:
It is the tendency of the intelligent to inform themselves about their symptomology prior to seeking help for their problems, unless they are brought to a clinician by law-enforcement or a family member prior to their having become aware of their symptoms.
When a patient uses clinical terminology to express symptoms, clinicians call this "intellectualizing." They don't like it for two reasons. One, malingerers use the same technique. Second, it really doesn't tell the clinician how you feel and that's what they want to know, not how you fit your feelings to a set of definitions. Avoid clinical terminology when discussing your situation with a clinician. "I can't focus" and "My thoughts race and are jumbled," mean more to a clinician that saying "I experience 'flight of ideas'."
Next, based upon my interpretation of your behavior, taking your post at face value, I can make a reasonable argument that you can fit another diagnosis, other than the one's you suspected and you were previously diagnosed as having.
Additionally, your symptoms are causing you significant distress and affecting your social and occupational functioning and the realization of your full potential in life. This is reason enough to seek professional help.
I would suggest that you do what you can to get yourself a complete psychological work-up to include a battery of psycholgical tests, personality inventories, psychosocial assessments, clinical interviews, and if indicated, an evaluation by a psychiatrist.
Frankly, I think you have nothing to lose.
I hope this helps.
(Disclaimer: This exercise is not intended to be a clinical diagnosis nor is it intended to be construed as medical advice. It is intended solely to address issues described in a post to this board and as an argument that the person, who expresses significant distress, should seek further evaluation.)
[edit on 04/9/11 by GradyPhilpott]
I am going to take your lengthy post at face value and I am going to tell you why I think that AADD may not be the best diagnosis for you and I am going to suggest that you get a second opinion, stop diagnosing yourself, and forget about indigo children until you get some help for your problems in living.
First of all, AADD requires an childhood onset.
A history of childhood attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is a mandatory prerequisite for the diagnosis of adult type ADHD, for which no DSM criteria exists. Since the diagnosis must be made retroactively, tentative criteria have been designed to establish the presence of the childhood disorder. www.biopsychiatry.com...
Secondly, You have a history of creative accomplishment.
Other things that I am able to focus on are things which require my imagination, which I have an ease to harness. I am a creative writer, poet,
have classical singing skills, small time actor, and occasional stand up comedian. My mind is very sharp, I do not miss much. I pick up unspoken vibes and changes in peoples manner often before others notice. This has made me a fantastic peace keeper and peer dipolamat. I have exceeded in areas of customer service in jobs where this was required. I have a fantastic knack for saying the thing which soothes an angry individual.
At least elveven of the symptoms listed below must be present for Adult ADHD or AADD:
(Diagnosis requires the presence of at least 11 of the following)
Inability to complete tasks
Difficulty focusing
Distractibility
Stress Intolerance
Frequent forgetfulness
Atypical response to psychoactive drugs
Antisocial personality disorder
Blurting out answers before the question is asked
Difficulty awaiting turn
Interrupting or intruding on others
Inattention Deficit
Driven to Distraction
Sense of Under achievement
Difficulty getting organized
Intolerance of boredom
Often creative and highly intelligent
Increase number of projects going on at the same time
Trouble following "proper procedures"
Tendency to worry needlessly
Sense of insecurity
Problems with self-esteem
Inaccurate self-observation
This criterion fits you, but it does not include the kind of effort and dedication to master the art of classical singing.
Often creative and highly intelligent
But notice this constellation of associated pathologies and behaviors:
Family History of substance abuse, ADHD, or depression
Additionally, symptoms of ADHD can be found in cases of learning disabilities, language disorders and mental retardation. Thus co morbidity raises the questions as to whether the presence of another disorder alters the likelihood of a positive drug response? Family histories of the first degree relatives find increased rates of ADHD, poly-substance dependence, antisocial personality disorder, depression and anxiety disorders. Additionally, there is a 25% concordance rate for ADHD exists among the pro bands' first-degree relatives (Weiss and Hechtman 1986). Children with ADHD are at an increased risk of having antisocial behavior, depression and poly-substance abuse problems occurring when they are adults.
Please note the following quote which addresses creativity in those who suffer from Bipolar Disorder, formerly known as Manic Depressive Disorder:
Though this psychopathology is not for one to wish, one interesting association with bipolar disorder is the creativity of those afflicted. (2, 3, 5, 7) This is not the normal creativity experienced by the above-average people (on the scale of creativity). This creativity is the creative genius, which is so rare, yet an inordinate percentage of the well-known creative people were/are afflicted with manic depression. (2, 3) Among the lengthy list are: (writers) F. Scott Fitzgerald, Ernest Hemingway, Sylvia Plath; (poets) William Blake, Sara Teasdale, Walt Whitman, Ralph Waldo Emerson; (composers) Rachmaninoff, Tchaikovsky. (10) Psychiatrists, realizing a connection greater than coincidence, have performed studies all over the world in an attempt to establish a link between bipolar disorder and creativity. (5) In the 1970s, Nancy C. Andreasen of the University of Iowa examined 30 creative writers and found 80% had experienced at least one episode of major depression, hypomania, or mania. (5) A few years later Kay Redfield Jamison studied 47 British writers, painters, and sculptors from the Royal Academy. She found that 38% had been treated for bipolar disorder. In particular, half of the poets (the largest group with manic depression) had needed medication or hospitalization. (5) Researchers at Harvard University set up a study to assess the degree of original thinking to perform creative tasks. They were going to rate creativity in a sample of manic-depressive patients. Their results showed that manic-depressives have a greater percentage of creativity than the controls. (5) There have been biographical studies of earlier generations of artists and writers which show that they have 18 times the rate of suicide (as compared to the general population), 8-10 times the rate of unipolar depression, and 10-20 times the rate of bipolar depression. (5) The additive results of these studies provide ample evidence that there is a link between bipolar disorder and creative genius. The question now is not whether or not there exists a connection between the two, but why it exists. serendip.brynmawr.edu...
It should be noted that while Adult ADHD or AADD and the manic or hypomanic phases of Bipolar Disorder do have similarities, the drugs used to treat these two disorders are quite different. AADD and ADHD are treated with relatively powerful CNS stimulants, while Bipolar is treated with anti-convulsants, lithium, and SSRIs. (Bipolar medications) (Adult ADHD medications)
This type of mood and behavior would, in my judgement, be consistent with a CNS stimulant:
A few weeks go by, and my ability to focus seems a miracle of modern medicine, and that's when the full blown anxiety attacks started...
I first noticed it in the waiting room at the research facility. It was filled with a group of about 6 very typical ADHD childern, all playing, all loud, all inquisitve of the world around them. I started sweating, their little angelic voices took on a shrill grating sound, they were running around knocking things over banging toys on toys. I could barely contain myself, but at that very moment I yelled SHUT THE HELL UP. Obviously everyone was taken aback, and I later after feeling quite justified at the time, realized what an A$$hole I was.
For people who have ADD, ADHD, AADD and/or Adult ADHD, the effect of a CNS stimulant is quite the opposite.
Well I realized how miserable I was becoming with the obvious side effects of the medicine and thankfully the research study ended within a week of my decision so it was good timing.
Now things are more or less back to "normal" I still can't focus on menial repetitive structured tasks, and I still can't hold down a job. I quit the last one, when I realized just how boring it was. It was that or I wasn't able to do the work anymore, and I was saving myself the embarasment of being fired.
Compare your symptoms with these criteria for Hypomania:
Clinical Symptoms of a Hypomanic Episode
This section describes the clinical symptoms of a hypomanic episode employed by psychiatrists and other mental health professionals as part of the diagnostic criteria for manic depression (Bipolar Disorder) and other mood disorders.
Therapy and the Role of Clinical Diagnostic Criteria
Symptoms of Major Depressive, Manic, Hypomanic and Mixed Episodes
Criteria for Hypomanic Episode
Therapy and the Role of Clinical Diagnostic Criteria
In my own face-to-face and online therapy practice, I do not treat clients as manifestations of mental illnesses in need of medical fixing. No one is merely a case of bipolar disorder, an obsessive-compulsive, or a paranoid schizophrenic. In my view, formal diagnostic categories hold some value in terms of contextual information, but they play a much less important role than the specific personal circumstances of a given client. If you are a client, you are -- first and foremost -- a specific, unique individual.
Nonetheless, in my experience of working with clients who have received formal psychiatric diagnoses from other mental health professionals, I have often found that clients feel they lack adequate information about what these diagnostic labels actually mean. The entries in this section aim to provide the basic facts about each of several diagnostic labels. Please note that the diagnostic information provided here is for educational purposes only and cannot replace the advice of a qualified mental health professional.
More information about diagnostic labels is available on the page on the DSM and ICD.
Symptoms of Major Depressive, Manic, Hypomanic and Mixed Episodes
Because the lists of symptoms for major depressive, manic, hypomanic and mixed episodes play closely interrelated roles in the diagnosis of mood disorders, all are included here separately. The following diagnostic criteria are reproduced verbatim from page 368 of the DSM-IV TR (where 'IV TR' indicates fourth edition, text revision).
Criteria for Hypomanic Episode
A. A distinct period of persistently elevated, expansive, or irritable mood, lasting throughout at least 4 days, that is clearly different from the usual nondepressed mood.
My mind is very sharp, I do not miss much. I pick up unspoken vibes and changes in peoples manner often before others notice. This has made me a fantastic peace keeper and peer dipolamat. I have exceeded in areas of customer service in jobs where this was required. I have a fantastic knack for saying the thing which soothes an angry individual.
B. During the period of mood disturbance, three (or more) of the following symptoms have persisted (four if the mood is only irritable) and have been present to a significant degree:
inflated self-esteem or grandiosity (see quote above)
decreased need for sleep (e.g., feels rested after only 3 hours of sleep)
more talkative than usual or pressure to keep talking
flight of ideas, or subjective experience that thoughts are racing
distractibility (i.e., attention too easily drawn to unimportant or irrelevant external stimuli)
had always wondered why I was scatterbrained, whereas others could delve into tedious low stimuli tasks and complete them. My mind would not allow for repetition without changing rapid stimuli. In the face of tedium, regardless of my very determined attempts to focus on the task at hand, my mind would wander. Many times I would only realize this after somone else had pointed this out to me, by ways of either yelling, or getting my attention brought to it.
This has always been the way my mind functioned. On the plus side, stimuli that has been rapid and changeable keeps my interest, television, great conversation with give and take, and video-games.
increase in goal-directed activity (either socially, at work or school, or sexually) or psychomotor agitation
Other things that I am able to focus on are things which require my imagination, which I have an ease to harness. I am a creative writer, poet,
have classical singing skills, small time actor, and occasional stand up comedian.
excessive involvement in pleasurable activities that have a high potential for painful consequences (e.g., engaging in unrestrained buying sprees, sexual indiscretions, or foolish business investments)
C. The episode is associated with an unequivocal change in functioning that is uncharacteristic of the person when not symptomatic.
D. The disturbance in mood and the change in functioning are observable by others.
E. The episode is not severe enough to cause marked impairment in social or occupational functioning, or to necessitate hospitalization, and there are no psychotic features.
On the Downside on the topic of Jobs, I have lost, or quit every job I have ever had since I started working 8 years ago. Either I would be fired for my lack of focus, or I would be so bored with the Job I would quit.
(This is not entirely consistent with the criteria, but it is worthy of note, that your symptoms are sufficient enough to cause social and occupational impairment. This information should be given to your clinician. GP)
F. The symptoms are not due to the direct physiological effects of a substance (e.g., a drug of abuse, a medication, or other treatment) or a general medical condition (e.g., hyperthyroidism).
Note: Hypomanic-like episodes that are clearly caused by somatic antidepressant treatment (e.g., medication, electroconvulsive therapy, light therapy) should not count toward a diagnosis of Bipolar II Disorder.
It is the tendency of the intelligent to inform themselves about their symptomology prior to seeking help for their problems, unless they are brought to a clinician by law-enforcement or a family member prior to their having become aware of their symptoms.
When a patient uses clinical terminology to express symptoms, clinicians call this "intellectualizing." They don't like it for two reasons. One, malingerers use the same technique. Second, it really doesn't tell the clinician how you feel and that's what they want to know, not how you fit your feelings to a set of definitions. Avoid clinical terminology when discussing your situation with a clinician. "I can't focus" and "My thoughts race and are jumbled," mean more to a clinician that saying "I experience 'flight of ideas'."
Next, based upon my interpretation of your behavior, taking your post at face value, I can make a reasonable argument that you can fit another diagnosis, other than the one's you suspected and you were previously diagnosed as having.
Additionally, your symptoms are causing you significant distress and affecting your social and occupational functioning and the realization of your full potential in life. This is reason enough to seek professional help.
I would suggest that you do what you can to get yourself a complete psychological work-up to include a battery of psycholgical tests, personality inventories, psychosocial assessments, clinical interviews, and if indicated, an evaluation by a psychiatrist.
Frankly, I think you have nothing to lose.
I hope this helps.
(Disclaimer: This exercise is not intended to be a clinical diagnosis nor is it intended to be construed as medical advice. It is intended solely to address issues described in a post to this board and as an argument that the person, who expresses significant distress, should seek further evaluation.)
[edit on 04/9/11 by GradyPhilpott]
I work in a pharmacy in the military and it seems as if around 25% of the children here are on some type of ritalin or concerta or the newest most
extravegant drug to "help" them. Well I can only say that when my father was a child back in the 60s they had these things call butt whoopens. They
worked to straighten kids out...... if you are a adult and suddenly think you are add or adhd i think you need to see a shrink. Realistically maybe
you have other issues that are complex enough to directly affect your state of well being........or maybe you yourself didnt recieve enough butt
whoppens either....
people please take my advice...... dont rely on a drug to babysit your kids for you...
people please take my advice...... dont rely on a drug to babysit your kids for you...
Originally posted by ADHDsux4me
Other things that I am able to focus on are things which require my imagination, which I have an ease to harness. I am a creative writer, poet,
have classical singing skills, small time actor, and occasional stand up comedian. My mind is very sharp, I do not miss much. I pick up unspoken vibes and changes in peoples manner often before others notice. This has made me a fantastic peace keeper and peer dipolamat. I have exceeded in areas of customer service in jobs where this was required. I have a fantastic knack for saying the thing which soothes an angry individual.
Your whole post was an interesting read ( i dont have much knowlage about these things).
I quoted one bit because i know someone with ADHD, he is a fantasic poet and has alot of creativity- as a kid they didnt know what was wrong with him and used to dismiss him from class- disipline him more ( beacause of his behaviour)- never did they stop and think that maybe something was wrong- i dont think it was until his late teens early twenties- he was told of what could have been wrong with him bla bla bla.
I dont know what the point of my reply is ( well there is no point)- i just found it interesting.
See you around and take it easy.
MissP
In reagrds to AADD, needing a childhood onset. I agree, I have actually had these symptoms from a very young age. I actually briefly had seen a
psychiatrist, for my problems of speaking out of turn and, and allways blurting out answers in class. I also would intrude in conversations often, and
had diffuculty focusing in class on subjects that bored me. The study of ADHD was still in its infancy at the time, and my parents didn't figure
there was anything, tragically wrong with me. So there really wasn't any follow up. Actually the reason I was taken to see the Psych was the school
suggested it, My parents also felt I was being treated unfairly for the school pointing this out to them. In general I have always obeyed my parents.
I have always been level headed, just very distracted and impulsive.
In essence I don't feel completely dysfunctional, but I have always languished with low stimuli tasks. I actually had always been a fairly well behaved albeit hyper child, and outspoken and bored easily.
For the other poster, I sure did get my share of whoopens. I don't disagree a whoopen deserved should be a whoopen given. But the fear of the whoopen works almost as well as the whoopen itself. lol
As far as mania is concerened, I'm not prone to bouts of mania, I am actually a very even person emotionally. I'm not subject to highs and lows. I may have had a flair for the dramatic in my initial post, but It's my style of writing.
Sleep, is such a blessing. I love it, mind you in an unrelated note I can have problems sleeping, if I am not on a fixed schedule synchronized with my body clock. When I do sleep I get a standard 6-9 hours depending on time and the days previous activity levels.
I have 2 other family members Now Diagnosed with ADD, but I was the first to seek treatment as it has affected me most as an adult. As a child it is something that could have been overlooked, but in light of being rationale, knowing myself, and the classic symptoms I could go no further living with the self-dissapointment.
The skills for entertainment I have, were things I really didn't have to work for, they came very naturally for me. I don't really credit them as accomplishments. They were just extensions of my talents. I didn't pursue them with a zealous gusto, to become masterful at them. I was just born lucky to be in tune with these aptitudes.
Singing, you just know when you open your mouth and sing along to a song compared to people's reactions if you have the aptitude. I also enjoyed it so I did chorus and had some training at my parents suggestion.
Writing, I dunno, I'm a natural wordsmith. It also goes hand in hand with imagination and creativity.
Acting, hmm I went with what came natural to my personality, I'm fairly outgoing and do not have a fear of the spotlight, and in fact I enjoy it. It may have been easier since I had done solo's in music before.
Stand up, I never really pursued it much, I always seemed to have my time tied up in my myriad of other interests. I did a few open mic nights. People tell me I'm a scream when I get in the mood to be funny.
As far as Indigo Children Go, what can I say, tell a person who has felt out of place a lot, that there are others with very similar problems, and personal qualities out there. Wouldn't you want to identify with them?
I want to thank you all for your input, and I appreciate you taking the time to write. Please continue, to do so here.
-ADHDsux4me
In essence I don't feel completely dysfunctional, but I have always languished with low stimuli tasks. I actually had always been a fairly well behaved albeit hyper child, and outspoken and bored easily.
For the other poster, I sure did get my share of whoopens. I don't disagree a whoopen deserved should be a whoopen given. But the fear of the whoopen works almost as well as the whoopen itself. lol
As far as mania is concerened, I'm not prone to bouts of mania, I am actually a very even person emotionally. I'm not subject to highs and lows. I may have had a flair for the dramatic in my initial post, but It's my style of writing.
Sleep, is such a blessing. I love it, mind you in an unrelated note I can have problems sleeping, if I am not on a fixed schedule synchronized with my body clock. When I do sleep I get a standard 6-9 hours depending on time and the days previous activity levels.
I have 2 other family members Now Diagnosed with ADD, but I was the first to seek treatment as it has affected me most as an adult. As a child it is something that could have been overlooked, but in light of being rationale, knowing myself, and the classic symptoms I could go no further living with the self-dissapointment.
The skills for entertainment I have, were things I really didn't have to work for, they came very naturally for me. I don't really credit them as accomplishments. They were just extensions of my talents. I didn't pursue them with a zealous gusto, to become masterful at them. I was just born lucky to be in tune with these aptitudes.
Singing, you just know when you open your mouth and sing along to a song compared to people's reactions if you have the aptitude. I also enjoyed it so I did chorus and had some training at my parents suggestion.
Writing, I dunno, I'm a natural wordsmith. It also goes hand in hand with imagination and creativity.
Acting, hmm I went with what came natural to my personality, I'm fairly outgoing and do not have a fear of the spotlight, and in fact I enjoy it. It may have been easier since I had done solo's in music before.
Stand up, I never really pursued it much, I always seemed to have my time tied up in my myriad of other interests. I did a few open mic nights. People tell me I'm a scream when I get in the mood to be funny.
As far as Indigo Children Go, what can I say, tell a person who has felt out of place a lot, that there are others with very similar problems, and personal qualities out there. Wouldn't you want to identify with them?
I want to thank you all for your input, and I appreciate you taking the time to write. Please continue, to do so here.
-ADHDsux4me
I believe I am an Indigo child. How was the name Indigo child created??
ADHDsux4me, my personal opinion is that you give a lot of thought to what Grady has pointed out. Get another opinion, maybe 3 or 4 more
opinions, before you start labeling yourself as one thing or another.
As I read your post, many of the things you said reminded me of someone I know who has bipolar disorder to the max. She's my ex-wife, live-in companion and lifelong best friend and soulmate. Her name is Stacy. She's certified as having bipolar I disorder (the rapid cycling variety). Her state of mind alters frequently from extremes of deep, debilitating depression to irrational, unfocussed mania. The cycle is continuous and repeats frequently, with no �normal� times in between. Cycling �rapidly�, in her case, means that her mental state shifts radically between the extremes every few days, and sometimes even more often.
Stacy is a brilliant person, but like yourself has never been able to keep a job. She gets bored rather quickly and cannot do tedious tasks. In a 9/5 situation she feels shackled, and it never lasts long. She isn't one to take supervision well, and in most cases ends up being dominant over whoever her boss is. It's not that she's trying to be pushy or bossy, it's just that she's almost always smarter than they are and finds it easy to manipulate them. Plus, she always seems to find a better way of doing things (more efficient, saves time, saves money), and others often find it unsettling. Especially when they've been doing a job for years and she's telling them how to do it better after a couple weeks. At any rate, she always gets bored with it and it never works out. She's quit some jobs that others would kill for.
Stacy has a strong logical side. At times her problem solving abilities are downright uncanny. And she's able to discuss issues without letting emotion get in the way when it's appropriate. She's about as sharp as they come. And yet on the flipside, she's extremely creative in an effortless sort of way. It just comes naturally. Currently she's trying to get her own photography business going. Of course, she doesn't care for the business end of it, but she loves taking photographs, and has taken some real winners. She didn't even know she had a talent for it until she won a photography contest that she had entered as a lark. This was only a couple of months after she started doing it for the first time. Her natural sense for imagery, symmetry and composition is incredible. People who've studied the art for years are amazed at her work.
On the downside, life for her is either flying upside down at mach 7 with her hair on fire or wallowing in the depths of despair, thinking everything is futile and that she's a complete failure. Her judgement and ability to make the right choices is most impaired during peak episodes of mania. During these times she becomes confused, as random thoughts race quickily through her mind. She loses the ability to focus, or concentrate, on anything for very long, and ultimately becomes very frustrated. It�s during these times that Stacy is most likely to make bad choices and do/say things she will later regret.
I only mention these things about Stacy in case you might see yourself in a similar light. Stacy has seen many, many doctors/shrinks over the the years, but it was just 2 years ago that she was diagnosed as bipolar. Before that, most doctors misdiagnosed her and didn't understand her condition in it's totality. And even though her condition has been nailed down and proper medications help a lot in leveling things out, she's still bipolar and will always struggle with being a little different than the "normal" person. And frankly, although I feel for her plight, it's the fact that she's not your average jane that appeals to me the most. One thing's for sure, life with her has never a dull moment ...
For my 2 cents, I think you should take heed of the things Grady so insightfully pointed out in his post. And whatever you do, the best of luck to you. You sound like a very bright and gifted person. See you around the boards ...
As I read your post, many of the things you said reminded me of someone I know who has bipolar disorder to the max. She's my ex-wife, live-in companion and lifelong best friend and soulmate. Her name is Stacy. She's certified as having bipolar I disorder (the rapid cycling variety). Her state of mind alters frequently from extremes of deep, debilitating depression to irrational, unfocussed mania. The cycle is continuous and repeats frequently, with no �normal� times in between. Cycling �rapidly�, in her case, means that her mental state shifts radically between the extremes every few days, and sometimes even more often.
Stacy is a brilliant person, but like yourself has never been able to keep a job. She gets bored rather quickly and cannot do tedious tasks. In a 9/5 situation she feels shackled, and it never lasts long. She isn't one to take supervision well, and in most cases ends up being dominant over whoever her boss is. It's not that she's trying to be pushy or bossy, it's just that she's almost always smarter than they are and finds it easy to manipulate them. Plus, she always seems to find a better way of doing things (more efficient, saves time, saves money), and others often find it unsettling. Especially when they've been doing a job for years and she's telling them how to do it better after a couple weeks. At any rate, she always gets bored with it and it never works out. She's quit some jobs that others would kill for.
Stacy has a strong logical side. At times her problem solving abilities are downright uncanny. And she's able to discuss issues without letting emotion get in the way when it's appropriate. She's about as sharp as they come. And yet on the flipside, she's extremely creative in an effortless sort of way. It just comes naturally. Currently she's trying to get her own photography business going. Of course, she doesn't care for the business end of it, but she loves taking photographs, and has taken some real winners. She didn't even know she had a talent for it until she won a photography contest that she had entered as a lark. This was only a couple of months after she started doing it for the first time. Her natural sense for imagery, symmetry and composition is incredible. People who've studied the art for years are amazed at her work.
On the downside, life for her is either flying upside down at mach 7 with her hair on fire or wallowing in the depths of despair, thinking everything is futile and that she's a complete failure. Her judgement and ability to make the right choices is most impaired during peak episodes of mania. During these times she becomes confused, as random thoughts race quickily through her mind. She loses the ability to focus, or concentrate, on anything for very long, and ultimately becomes very frustrated. It�s during these times that Stacy is most likely to make bad choices and do/say things she will later regret.
I only mention these things about Stacy in case you might see yourself in a similar light. Stacy has seen many, many doctors/shrinks over the the years, but it was just 2 years ago that she was diagnosed as bipolar. Before that, most doctors misdiagnosed her and didn't understand her condition in it's totality. And even though her condition has been nailed down and proper medications help a lot in leveling things out, she's still bipolar and will always struggle with being a little different than the "normal" person. And frankly, although I feel for her plight, it's the fact that she's not your average jane that appeals to me the most. One thing's for sure, life with her has never a dull moment ...
For my 2 cents, I think you should take heed of the things Grady so insightfully pointed out in his post. And whatever you do, the best of luck to you. You sound like a very bright and gifted person. See you around the boards ...
ADHDSux4me:
You are like I am - normal!
The pharma. co's created the ADHD/ADD syndrome to sell more drugs (via sponsered uni studies by professors/doctors).
I'm just waiting for what they're going to come up with next. It's simple for them really - take certain "traits" that are considered "abnormal", fund a study, create a drug and there's another revenue stream. It's disgusting really!
Big advise - stay off the drugs as they'll only mind fu(k you more.
Regarding a job - I found I couldn't work for people and I started my own business...then another...and another. The hardest part is keeping focused and not getting bored - you have to learn quite a bit of self discipline here.
A good career choice is to look at all your hobbies (the things that keep you stimulated/happy) and try to mix one of these with a way to generate $. Don't expect to come up with something overnight - it may take days/months or weeks before you come up with a bright idea...and believe me, there are many ways to generate $...In the end, you'll be doing something that you like and you'll make money at the same time.
Good luck.
PS: I am also Indigo - it's just another way to describe people with certain "traits"...and a certain "gift" if you want to call it that...
[edit on 11-9-2004 by jumpspace]
You are like I am - normal!
The pharma. co's created the ADHD/ADD syndrome to sell more drugs (via sponsered uni studies by professors/doctors).
I'm just waiting for what they're going to come up with next. It's simple for them really - take certain "traits" that are considered "abnormal", fund a study, create a drug and there's another revenue stream. It's disgusting really!
Big advise - stay off the drugs as they'll only mind fu(k you more.
Regarding a job - I found I couldn't work for people and I started my own business...then another...and another. The hardest part is keeping focused and not getting bored - you have to learn quite a bit of self discipline here.
A good career choice is to look at all your hobbies (the things that keep you stimulated/happy) and try to mix one of these with a way to generate $. Don't expect to come up with something overnight - it may take days/months or weeks before you come up with a bright idea...and believe me, there are many ways to generate $...In the end, you'll be doing something that you like and you'll make money at the same time.
Good luck.
PS: I am also Indigo - it's just another way to describe people with certain "traits"...and a certain "gift" if you want to call it that...
[edit on 11-9-2004 by jumpspace]
The things about that malady which are not synonamous about me is the switch between high's and lows.
I don't have phases of one extreme or another. I am generally upbeat most of the time. As everyone does, we have points of being bummed out. I can only recall 3 times in my life where I was depressed, but they were of a considerable time. At 19 I had a nervous breakdown, when I realized the world didn't revolve around me. To clarify, in my youthfull ignorance I got a dose of reality that I couldn't live my life recklessly and not hold my self to standard responsibilities like paying bills, having a job, a place to live, etc. I was in a place where I felt trapped, I had only a place to live, but lost My Job and my car, and was stuck like that for 6 months. I buckled under the stress.
The Second time I was depressed, I had moved out to Las Vegas to Pursue my dream of Show Business. I didn't plan well, and relied on fate, and good luck to see me through. Needless to say, while I may eventually be recognized as decent writer, I struggled to maintain a regular life out there. Too much ambition and nothing financially to fall back on. I went out there with only a $1000 dollars. I did it to escape, and it was impulsive. So it failed. I got depressed when I was stuck moving back to Massachusetts, and due to the tragedy of 9-11 I was not able to get a job, and get a car again. So I had to work a crappy job and give all of my money over to rent save $50 a week. It was a necessity, I was living with my dad, and he was in a finacnial bind, so it was necessary for us to live that way. I couldn't escape, my Dad needed me. In this matter, I was stuck between a rock and a hard place, so I started abusing alcohol. Eventually it got better, and I came to terms with my drinking, and now I don't.
Depression 3, Is more or less now. After again moving to Las Vegas for the second time, I fell into the same pattern. I impulsively went there to escape, and try to pursue show biz. I failed with improper planning, and low financial backup. I fared better this time, but still struggled. I was made an offer by mother, and grandmother to move back here. The offer was move back here and become my grandmother's caretaker, she's disabled with a diabetes and blindness. Also my mother would pay for me to return to school. I went for the EMT-B course Emergency Medical Tech, Basic. I passed the course, but had problems studying. I passed on good retention, but could have done better if I had the patience to study. I have yet to take the test to become state certified, I find that while I take well to helping people, I have been distracted by thoughts of life fullfillment in other ways.
So to explain this depression, I am now trapped between a rock and hard place. I need to help my grandmother, and now also my great aunt who is diabetic and blind and lives alone needs my help. These 2 women are essentially helpless on their own. But I have become more or less a slave to all things menial relvoved around them. I have become overwhelmed. I think the worst experience was, my Aunt Called up for me to drive 20 minutes to her house to hand her a can of diest pepsi which was 5 feet away from her. If that doesn't serve to frustrate, I don't know what does.
So between guilt, and being used as an errand boy for ridiculous things. I am feeling trapped. I don't want to revert to impulsive escapism, it has gotten me no-where in the past, but ask yourself. Which is more important, my own mental health, or giving into guilt to drive 20 minutes and hand someone a drink which is 5 feet away.
So these are my thoughts and ramblings for now,
-ADHDsux4me
I don't have phases of one extreme or another. I am generally upbeat most of the time. As everyone does, we have points of being bummed out. I can only recall 3 times in my life where I was depressed, but they were of a considerable time. At 19 I had a nervous breakdown, when I realized the world didn't revolve around me. To clarify, in my youthfull ignorance I got a dose of reality that I couldn't live my life recklessly and not hold my self to standard responsibilities like paying bills, having a job, a place to live, etc. I was in a place where I felt trapped, I had only a place to live, but lost My Job and my car, and was stuck like that for 6 months. I buckled under the stress.
The Second time I was depressed, I had moved out to Las Vegas to Pursue my dream of Show Business. I didn't plan well, and relied on fate, and good luck to see me through. Needless to say, while I may eventually be recognized as decent writer, I struggled to maintain a regular life out there. Too much ambition and nothing financially to fall back on. I went out there with only a $1000 dollars. I did it to escape, and it was impulsive. So it failed. I got depressed when I was stuck moving back to Massachusetts, and due to the tragedy of 9-11 I was not able to get a job, and get a car again. So I had to work a crappy job and give all of my money over to rent save $50 a week. It was a necessity, I was living with my dad, and he was in a finacnial bind, so it was necessary for us to live that way. I couldn't escape, my Dad needed me. In this matter, I was stuck between a rock and a hard place, so I started abusing alcohol. Eventually it got better, and I came to terms with my drinking, and now I don't.
Depression 3, Is more or less now. After again moving to Las Vegas for the second time, I fell into the same pattern. I impulsively went there to escape, and try to pursue show biz. I failed with improper planning, and low financial backup. I fared better this time, but still struggled. I was made an offer by mother, and grandmother to move back here. The offer was move back here and become my grandmother's caretaker, she's disabled with a diabetes and blindness. Also my mother would pay for me to return to school. I went for the EMT-B course Emergency Medical Tech, Basic. I passed the course, but had problems studying. I passed on good retention, but could have done better if I had the patience to study. I have yet to take the test to become state certified, I find that while I take well to helping people, I have been distracted by thoughts of life fullfillment in other ways.
So to explain this depression, I am now trapped between a rock and hard place. I need to help my grandmother, and now also my great aunt who is diabetic and blind and lives alone needs my help. These 2 women are essentially helpless on their own. But I have become more or less a slave to all things menial relvoved around them. I have become overwhelmed. I think the worst experience was, my Aunt Called up for me to drive 20 minutes to her house to hand her a can of diest pepsi which was 5 feet away from her. If that doesn't serve to frustrate, I don't know what does.
So between guilt, and being used as an errand boy for ridiculous things. I am feeling trapped. I don't want to revert to impulsive escapism, it has gotten me no-where in the past, but ask yourself. Which is more important, my own mental health, or giving into guilt to drive 20 minutes and hand someone a drink which is 5 feet away.
So these are my thoughts and ramblings for now,
-ADHDsux4me
Hey man - I feel your pain.
I have been on Ritilin and concerta (i am currently on it now) for the last7 years (since my jr year in HS) and I have to say - I understand just about everything you are talking about.
The iritation you experience though is a little different for me. I get it when the drug is no longer in effect. I can remember my mom coming home from work when I was in HS and just flipping out on her for the most stupid reasons.
It turned out I just got that way when the time released stuff wore off, so my mom knew there was an hour to hour and a half period where she would just leave me alone
Any way, if you really do not like the meds, but want to improve your attention, may I advise that you change your diet? It helped me A LOT. There are some books on the subject, for me, I just need to stay away from sugar and caffine, but for others it supposedly requires drastic changes.
Anyway best of luck to you and the rest of us ADDers out there
I have been on Ritilin and concerta (i am currently on it now) for the last7 years (since my jr year in HS) and I have to say - I understand just about everything you are talking about.
The iritation you experience though is a little different for me. I get it when the drug is no longer in effect. I can remember my mom coming home from work when I was in HS and just flipping out on her for the most stupid reasons.
It turned out I just got that way when the time released stuff wore off, so my mom knew there was an hour to hour and a half period where she would just leave me alone
Any way, if you really do not like the meds, but want to improve your attention, may I advise that you change your diet? It helped me A LOT. There are some books on the subject, for me, I just need to stay away from sugar and caffine, but for others it supposedly requires drastic changes.
Anyway best of luck to you and the rest of us ADDers out there
wow i know how you feel i have ADD too. I had it for 19 years and i am also LD or LLD language learning disorder in math reading writing and math.
ummmm i think that this whole add ting is made up...... i seriously think some people just have a harder time concentrating then others. Like I had
mentioned before they never had "A.D.D." or "A.D.H.D." like 50 yrs ago. I think it all stems from a LACK OF PARENTING!!!! I work in a pharmacy and
when the parents come in to pick up their kids meds for adhd and add you can tell the parent is probably the root of the problem. Typically middle
aged parents working blue collar sometimes white collar jobs. They dont make enough money to take time off work and give their kids time and
dedication. So they work like 60 hours weeks..... Their kids get neglected and start getting ornary. (sound familiar). The parents feel bad for not
spending time with their kids and the parents blame themselves so in return for not giving their child time they dont discipline the child. The
parents think well i cant discipline the child it is my fault. The child goes on to get away with more and more until they are uncontrolable hence
leading to "severe adhd". So as a fix the parents now would rather turn their fun loving kids into zombies and put them on ritalin or concerta. This
way it mellows the kid out and they are less likely to be a problem to society and the parent no longer has to go to the school once a week and talk
with the teachers and stuff cause now their kid has lost all the fun things kids do in life. Well they still get to do them but they arent able to
enjoy them like a normal person is becuase they are to damn stoned from prescribed meds. It is sad really. I wish more parents would figure out that
their is nothing wrong with their kid they either need attention or a @ss whoopen
As a parent of two children with ADHD, I have a pretty good ides as to what you are going threw.
I could take up page after page on them, but I won't.
What I will do is this, I suggest that you get another opeion and second if they say that you are ADHD as well than explore with your doctor the kind of med that would be best for you.
Not all meds have the same side effects, as the saying goes, if ones you don't sugsead try try again.[spelling]
If you ever need a shoulder to cry on figurtivly speaking feel free to U2U me/
NEVER GIVE UP
I could take up page after page on them, but I won't.
What I will do is this, I suggest that you get another opeion and second if they say that you are ADHD as well than explore with your doctor the kind of med that would be best for you.
Not all meds have the same side effects, as the saying goes, if ones you don't sugsead try try again.[spelling]
If you ever need a shoulder to cry on figurtivly speaking feel free to U2U me/
NEVER GIVE UP
Originally posted by ADHDsux4me
The things about that malady which are not synonamous about me is the switch between high's and lows.
I don't have phases of one extreme or another. I am generally upbeat most of the time.
I am no expert but I immediately thought bi-polar when I read your 1st post and was glad to see that Grady had suggested searching further for a diagnosis.
Regarding your interpretation about the highs and lows, I have a close family member that was diagnosed w/ bipolar last year at the age of 42 just before we lost her to it and misdiagnosis. It accelerated and intensified over the course of time. She never recognized the highs. To her the highs were her feeling normal and being okay. It wasn't till she was in her 40's that the lows became so bad and frequent she sought meds for that, (which can be downright life threatening if in fact the problem is bipolar) while those around her recognized the intensity of her highs as beyond normal behavior.
Just be careful. Do not try to figure this one out on your own. From my experience, a bipolar often does not recognize themselves on a self diagnosis. In addition, there is no one drug or combination of drugs that works for bipolars once diagnosed. The treatment is highly individualized and once the right combo is found, it often needs readjusting over time, so you almost have to see a highly experienced practitioner for it.
Just my 2 cents....
I cannot seem to draw the parallels as how ADHD could be confused with Bi-polar. Could one be both with co-morbidity?
I really, really, don't want to associate myself with bi-polar. I was betrayed deeply by someone who was "classic" bi-polar. Delusions, false-memories, etc. I may be refusing to see the parallels, but my problems how I feel about them are too similar to ADHD to be misconstrued as bi-polar in my mind.
Would anyone be interested, in pointing them out clinicaly not drawn from my statements? I would like to compare notes.
My Thanks,
-ADHDsux4me
P.S. Hey Mr. T, I can agree to an extent with you, but inability to concentrate has nothing to do with parents. Mine were always there for me, and I still can't maintain focus.
I really, really, don't want to associate myself with bi-polar. I was betrayed deeply by someone who was "classic" bi-polar. Delusions, false-memories, etc. I may be refusing to see the parallels, but my problems how I feel about them are too similar to ADHD to be misconstrued as bi-polar in my mind.
Would anyone be interested, in pointing them out clinicaly not drawn from my statements? I would like to compare notes.
My Thanks,
-ADHDsux4me
P.S. Hey Mr. T, I can agree to an extent with you, but inability to concentrate has nothing to do with parents. Mine were always there for me, and I still can't maintain focus.
Originally posted by ilovehaters
ummmm i think that this whole add ting is made up...... i seriously think some people just have a harder time concentrating then others. Like I had mentioned before they never had "A.D.D." or "A.D.H.D." like 50 yrs ago. I think it all stems from a LACK OF PARENTING!!!! I work in a pharmacy and when the parents come in to pick up their kids meds for adhd and add you can tell the parent is probably the root of the problem. Typically middle aged parents working blue collar sometimes white collar jobs. They dont make enough money to take time off work and give their kids time and dedication. So they work like 60 hours weeks..... Their kids get neglected and start getting ornary. (sound familiar). The parents feel bad for not spending time with their kids and the parents blame themselves so in return for not giving their child time they dont discipline the child. The parents think well i cant discipline the child it is my fault. The child goes on to get away with more and more until they are uncontrolable hence leading to "severe adhd". So as a fix the parents now would rather turn their fun loving kids into zombies and put them on ritalin or concerta. This way it mellows the kid out and they are less likely to be a problem to society and the parent no longer has to go to the school once a week and talk with the teachers and stuff cause now their kid has lost all the fun things kids do in life. Well they still get to do them but they arent able to enjoy them like a normal person is becuase they are to damn stoned from prescribed meds. It is sad really. I wish more parents would figure out that their is nothing wrong with their kid they either need attention or a @ss whoopen
Typical comments from an ignorant person!!!!!!!!!
My son has been on different drugs since being diagnosed with ADHD when he was 6 yrs old. We have tried counselling, been to many discussion groups, read the books, changed diet, tried fish oil and other such natural remedies. Yes we have even tried 'KICK UP THE BACKSIDE'!!!!
The only thing that showed any changes in behaviour was diet, but cutting out some of the preservatives etc show the same changes in non ADHD kids as those with it. Diet is not the answer for some.
We noticed a dramatic improvement in his behaviour whilst taking prescribed medications. Guess what?? My son is happier too! He knows he needs to take it because he is usually upset by the behaviour he exhibits when a dose is missed.
Well, Ilovehaters you say you work in a chemist, it is quite evident that you are not a Registered Pharmacist by your ignorant comments. Ritalin etc do not "make my son stoned" nor do they have this effect on anyone who has been accurately diagnosed. Also, I have only ever worked part-time since my son was born and always spend plenty of quality time with him. We have a happy homelife, my husband and I have been together for 23 years. My husband has always been available to spend time with our children.
If this subject interests you so much perhaps you should do some research before you put your ridiculous and bias statements to this thread.
ADMIT YOU ARE A HORRIBLE PARENT.......... and your clueless as to how drugs work....... i will go head to head with you and any other ritalin
"mom" if thats what you want to call yourself.....if you seriously believe your child has a problem then why didnt kids in the 50s have this problem
or the 60s ???.......... yes drug companies do mean things including putting doctors to misdiagnose some new disease that the drug company invented
and just so happens to have a miracle drug for...... by the way i never claimed to be a Doctor of pharmacy or be a RPH (figure it out if you dont know
what it means) ....... you should have continued the spankings....... trust me they work miracles... I have a younger brother age 6 (im 25) who the
doctor told my father needed to be on ritalin. I told my dad not to do it. And to work with him and teach him to breath when he gets excited .... if
they mis_behave a butt whoppen works wonders. Obviously you havent figured that out.... just cause you tapped your kids hiney once doesnt mean you
gave him punishment.........
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