Tough Guy Image

reply to post by maryhinge


Good for you! You are the type of person I admire. Keep up the good work and good health to you always!

I have no problems with folks who want to build their body-mass at the gym or cover with tatoos etc.

It's all for the same common goal - to get laid.
Sorry to put it so bluntly but that's exactly how I feel.

Where I take exception to is the fake "toughness" that guys (haven't seen this on women yet) surround themselves with in order to "play the role".
The best example of this is their vehicles.

A fake-tough usually has 1 or a combination of these items decorating their vehicle:

-Flashy wheels or oversize tires
-fake air-intake vents on front wheel well/fender
-loud pipes
-"Tap it Out" or "Ain't Skeered" stickers
-Some sort of deer hunter sticker or image
-Any reference to Nike, Oakley, Dale Earnhardt or a speaker manufacturer on their car
-Imagery depicting a little kid pissing on something

......

Seeing one of these vehicles usually prompts my wife or I to say the same thing.."There goes another Massengill stockholder" (ie. douchbag)

In high school, I was amongst the tall ones. And one thing I hated were fights.

Because I had severely beaten another kid in fifth grade. I went "boink" and when he came back to school the next week, he still showed impressive bruises. I had never felt so ashamed, and it still brings tears to my eyes as I write this...

In the week he was absent, I had time to think on what had happened. And I found out I was becoming a bully out of fear, not lack of intelligence. I had always been a good student, but that year, everything went down. As another poster said, you crossed my way, you got beat, pure and simple. I didn't mind facing two or three guys at the same time. And I never lost a fight. But after that kid... I changed.

When I first saw him back in school, I went straight to him, and told him, so everybody could hear, that I was deeply sorry for what I did to him, and that he never deserved it.

After that, I vowed to use my "boxing" abilities to do good. When ever I saw a frail guy being menaced, I was there to protect. I still didn't mind facing many opponents, but this time, it was to beat the bullies-would-be, and protect those who were weaker. But surprisingly, just by standing up to the bullies and the crowd who wanted to see a beating take place, was enough to stop the violence. I would simply grab the bullies and call for any one who wanted to stop me from stopping them to do it... Never did I had to use my fists again! I guess people know when someone means business!
I made many many friends then, and was known in every circle of school. All doors were opened to me.

But I never forgot it was fear that made me act that way. And life as shown me it is the same for every bullies in the world. Given there ARE psychos, all the others do it out of fear.

Simply showing you are not afraid, and that you measure them by your own rules will be enough to disarm most. They will be angry, but will ultimately respect you for that. Their fear is their fuel, and yours is your death, if you let it show. Simply show confidence, calm confidence, and all will be well.

It has never failed. This from an ex-bully. Still fearing some things, but not letting it drive me anymore.

Now, when a "fear bell" rings, I simply take it as me wanting to be cautious.

Peace

It's all about control. By acting this way this idiots can have just about anything they want: girls, respect, money, power, STDs

I used to be like that when i was going to school. Its a fake image. Most tough guys are really just scared and want to portray them self's as scary so no one will mess with them. Then over time it progresses (I never got this far) to a point where they are not scared and notice every one is afraid of them, they like the power so they take to the extreme.

Some posters said it is because they are stupid, they are just playing off a movie/TV stereo type that the meat head is all ways stupid, if you believe that stereo type then your stupid. Dont let the media do your thinking for you. I think its just a natural reaction to growing up in a scary environment.

Could be one or a combination:

- Some people are strong because require it (football player, body builder, soldier, fireman)
- They want to attract the opposite sex
- For confidence booster
- To be healthy, and it feels great

reply to post by Ralphy


Because some people's genetics make it easier for them to build muscle mass.. most people go for the easiest defense mechanisms for them.. some people have strong bodies.. some people hide behind humor.. whatever comes naturally. Not to say that we can't learn different ways.

Attraction and a healthy body?

I'd say in my case anyway that going to the gym has nothing to do with trying to stay safe or being able to look after myself.I could look after myself when i was very skinny.I started going to the gym because i was very skinny and had low self esteem about myself and depression,i also did very little exercise.I now feel much better about myself than i ever did and if i'm having a low day it can help to pick me up a little.Reading through this thread it stands out to me that a lot of you are judging people by how they look when you don't even know these people,sure some asumptions might be right but i'm sure most of you should know better than to judge a book by it's cover.

reply to post by StealthyKat


thank you for your kind words
and good health to you