posted on Oct, 23 2011 @ 03:53 PM
Please note that this is a journal, and hopefully, those who read this thread will have some of their hard questions answered in their walk, as my
questions have been answered little by little everyday... you are never alone brothers and sisters, not just brothers and sisters in Christ, but of
this world. Some may hate me, I will not be surprised, but i think this journal will be helpful in the lives of those that are truly seeking God; the
time is near, and just as our Father wants, i want to see you all in heaven and rejoice together in His magnificent truth as we sing Him praises... i
am holding back tears as i write this because i know some will not acknowledge Him as our Father, and it may be for some, the last chance.
Here is some background information i just graduated high school and didn't go to college. My grades in high school were HORRIBLE, i should not have
even passed junior and senior year. However, before freshman year, I was an A student, in several Gifted and Talented programs, a natural born leader
as you would say. If you know me personally, you can say I had one of the best high school careers... i partied since freshman year with the seniors,
smoking weed, drinking, popping pills, dropping tabs, snorting lines, treating girls like they were objects... i was young, didn't have much care in
the world... but i always felt a void... like SOMETHING wasn't right... anyways,my mental health was breaking down (the '___' trip really didn't help
as well, i think that I was infiltrated as gateways were opened) as my family was breaking apart as we felt the economic pressure... and my dad was
hard for work, but yet i continued to take money and advantage of him... and since he loved me so much, he was fine with giving me money, which only
enabled my spiraling path of destruction. But without that, i wouldn't be in the place i am now, and i am forever grateful. i have had this strong
belief that my purpose in life was going to be "great." my spiritual godmother said it,