To Not Be Loved Is Like Hell

Originally posted by Jepic
Again!?

Yes, again. Maybe you will get it eventually. Hopefully you will live long enough to understand this. If not..... rut away.

Originally posted by intrepid

Originally posted by Jepic
Again!?

Yes, again. Maybe you will get it eventually. Hopefully you will live long enough to understand this. If not..... rut away.

Hopefully you get hit by a bus tomorrow, survive then get hit by another one.
If not... rust away.

Your comment is complete BS.

My advice. Take it or leave it. All of these are serious, even if they don't sound like it. We live in a superficial world.

Take a extensive shower every day.

If you're overweight, try your best to loose weight.

Look around at your contemporaries. If you find that you dress poorly compared to them, improve your wardrobe and wear the appropriate clothing at the appropriate times.

Wear only clean clothes.

If you wear facial hair and are not having success, shave. If you don't have facial hair, give it a try.

Do you find yourself wearing fedoras? Don't.

You can still be a geek, dork, dweeb, nerd (like me). You just don't need to wear it so much.

reply to post by Jepic


If this was your thread I would just walk away. It's not your thread. OP listen to the reason you are seeing here. Not the knee jerk reactions of, well, jerks. They can't help you.

Step 1: Get off the internet
Step 2: Go outside
Step 3: ???
Step 4: Profit and love

Don't change for all them pathetic people out there who will just care about you superficially. Give them all a big FU and just fudge them...

Try and get to know people who are most like you. They are the ones worth being with and fighting for.

But really now. Anyone you have to change for is not worth changing for.
It's about people who like/love you for who you are.

They are the ones that at the end of the day will walk beside you through the cold and fog. Real friendship is what I call it.

reply to post by Jepic


Can I get a T&C Violation?

Thanks.

Originally posted by intrepid
reply to post by Jepic

 

If this was your thread I would just walk away. It's not your thread. OP listen to the reason you are seeing here. Not the knee jerk reactions of, well, jerks. They can't help you.

Just sharing my story for the OP. Also giving some advice. It's still his thread.
Don't think so? Read the comments.

Thanks for the compliment though...

Originally posted by WickettheRabbit
reply to post by Jepic

 

Can I get a T&C Violation?

Thanks.

Sure. You got it. No need to thank me.

Been there almost my entire life(21). Relationships are a mess. There's the positive but....
If your seeking pleasure or security in anyway, pain and anguish will follow.

its been said "You'll catch bigger fish in the sea if you manage not to drown in it"

Just got to live with it, life is RAW
I'll probably die alone, seriously lol whatever, the tears have been dry

Originally posted by intrepid
I have to ask what you mean by "love". Sex? Intimacy? Those are 2 totally different entities. Caledonia nailed it. You can't even start to "love" another until you love yourself. The childish can put a masturbation joke in here.

How can you even love yourself when your self confidence and self worth has vanished??
You clearly don't know what the heck you are talking about.
And love does not usually mean sex, so i don't see why you even ask that question.
This is why i would never ever pay for a hooker, as that just would not be love at all.

And i say this as a person who is still virgin and unloved at nearly 30 years of age.
In beginning i actually had hope and self confidence, but that has now completely evaporated due to my situation.
I am at that point where i know i will most likely die as a lonely unloved virgin.

Originally posted by intrepid

Originally posted by Jepic
Again!?

Yes, again. Maybe you will get it eventually. Hopefully you will live long enough to understand this. If not..... rut away.

That comment shows what a person you are. Maybe you should try to work on your empathy.

Originally posted by juleol

Originally posted by intrepid
I have to ask what you mean by "love". Sex? Intimacy? Those are 2 totally different entities. Caledonia nailed it. You can't even start to "love" another until you love yourself. The childish can put a masturbation joke in here.

How can you even love yourself when your self confidence and self worth has vanished??
You clearly don't know what the heck you are talking about.
And love does not usually mean sex, so i don't see why you even ask that question.
This is why i would never ever pay for a hooker, as that just would not be love at all.

And i say this as a person who is still virgin and unloved at nearly 30 years of age.
In beginning i actually had hope and self confidence, but that has now completely evaporated due to my situation.
I am at that point where i know i will most likely die as a lonely unloved virgin.

edit on 13-10-2011 by juleol because: (no reason given)

I respect you man. That's a nightmare. Just a really bad nightmare.

And it makes me angry at the world.

If you're looking to have intercourse, there are ways to achieve that goal. I won't be detailing those here, but don't let anyone tell you "you don't pay for it" because you do in some way or another.

Maybe once that happens, you'll have some more confidence. Your call.

What would you say is the biggest holdup to your love life?

Originally posted by juleol
That comment shows what a person you are. Maybe you should try to work on your empathy.

You're right. I apologize.

Originally posted by greyer
Now I don't know what hell would be like but I am assuming that it is much worse than to go through life not being loved. But to go on for years and have the opposite sex not care anything about you, it feels like hell. It feels like you want to cry so much inside but your tears are all dry. It feels like you want to throw up but you are not sick. Every time I see lovers I get jealous now just because I have gone for so many years witnessing ladies not care anything about me. This person is so heart broken, every day by lunch time I have so much pressure in my chest I am about to burst with flame, all because the opposite sex does not care anything about me and has not cared anything about me.

edit on 13-10-2011 by greyer because: (no reason given)

Nope.
Wrong.
You are heart broken because you are Narcissus.
Your attention is turned inward upon your Ego Self.
You are creating the very feeling you suffer from.
You are contracting upon yourself as you try to escape
from yourself.
Some people have the luck to be Narcissus and to find
someone who will still love them. Some do not.

At this point you can continue to suffer or you can
abandon your suffering in the Eternal Love/Bliss of
Reality which will make you more attractive to everyone.

Originally posted by intrepid
I have to ask what you mean by "love". Sex? Intimacy? Those are 2 totally different entities. Caledonia nailed it. You can't even start to "love" another until you love yourself. The childish can put a masturbation joke in here.

Love to me is the vibration of existence and time, so when I think of time I fall deeply in love. The more I understand love I can vibrate in harmony with life and my being. A lot of people would say you have to love yourself before you can love another or another can love you. I conclude that if I were to feel more deeply in love I would have more understanding.

Originally posted by Hawkwind.
reply to post by greyer

 

It doesn't matter who you are or what you do, there is someone out there for everyone, no question about it.

These words are profound and make me feel so much better.

Originally posted by FissionSurplus
Believe it or not, there are women out there who feel as isolated, lonely and rejected as you do. Your situation is rather like a catch 22.....the more hurt, angry and desperate you become, the more women are put off by it, and the more hurt, angry and rejected you become.

It is necessary to break this cycle within yourself before you can break the lonely cycle of your life. First of all, the intense focus on yourself must be turned outward. This is usually done by volunteer work. You can volunteer at animal shelters as a dog walker or a cat petter (there are TONS of single women who volunteer there). You can volunteer to bring food to the elderly and disabled (Meals on Wheels). Just search the internet for volunteer opportunities in your area.

Once you are focused outward, on others, the better and more attractive parts of who you are will surface, and women will definitely be attracted to that.

Another option is to join clubs, like walking clubs. You show up with a smile and some walking shoes, and go walking along with others.

The emphasis here is to get yourself engaged in a social activity in which the focus is not on dating, but rather helping others or making friends.

As Albert Einstein said, You cannot solve a problem at the same level at which it was created. Break the cycle, get out and care about others, and you'd be surprised at some of the female attention you receive (as long as you are friendly, open and not pushy).

Oh trust me I believe it, and thats why one of the many things to learn from this post is to be aware of the world. Be aware of my place on earth.

Originally posted by timi0000
Man, I'm sorry to hear you're so distraught. Look to find joy! That's the key. I found joy by meditating, and shutting off the negative thoughts that told me I was no good. Whenever you're feeling down, ask yourself "would things be different if I felt joy right now?". Also, get close to your dad if you're nit already. Men who have poor relationships will their dads will have problems with women. It's all about how you feel inside. When you feel really good, you will be surprised at how your life changes.

Thanks a lot I will do. Today I am not only needing a change in my soul, but a complete change in my mind. I need to do it for my attitude. I need to be the kind of person who can feel rejected but still be happy and smile.