Gaining Friends

I was wondering if anyone knew how to gain friends. When I was 15 I moved out of my hometown, then when I was 25 I moved out of my state for a job. Focusing on the job has been good for the amount of years, but socially there are not many who have stayed in my life out of the hundreds of people I met and talked to. I'm respectful, positive, and social so sometimes I wonder why don't I have a large amount of friends..

Get involved in things that other people are involved in. You'll make some friends eventually.
Check out meetup.com and you can see meet some like-minded people.

School and work are the 2 most likely places to make good friends, usually.

reply to post by greyer


In my experience people with less friends have better friends.

What state are you in?

I will be your freind.

My honest opinion is that a handful of quality friends are better than having a large quantity of friends.

For that matter - I am your-run-of-the-mill introvert, so I am happier with my own company than that of most other people, and am probably not the best person to give advice here.

But if you find that not many people stay in your life, it may be for a variety of reasons. "Respect, positivity and social capabilities" helps, but you may have strong and "different" ideas or a interesting personality without even realizing it, which is often the first thing that sends "normal people" scampering. Your intelligence, take-on-life or experience may be even intimidating to some - gosh - there are so many factors at play in the intricacies of human interaction!

Basically all I want to say is that if people are too "superficial" or have too much "bum-fluff" to pursue a friendship, don't dwell on it, and rather look forward to forging one or two real friendships with people who totally gets you. Every person has at least one or two of those in the world - it is only a matter of waiting it out.

Failing that - get a cat or dog. They are awesome friends - waaayyy cooler than most people.

I kind of have 3 different levels of friends...

On one hand, there are my close friends...a few folks I've known for more than a decade, who I'd do anything for, and who'd do anything for me. Most of these, came from previous jobs (mostly when I was a teen) or in school.

Then, there are friends...a slightly larger group, who I see occasionally, and do things with occasionally, usually group functions, etc.

Then, there are acquaintances, who I hardly ever see, but we all consider each other to be friends...we just don't socialize that much outside of the setting we see each other (like work, etc.)

My advice is just to be approachable, and try to interact with people during fun activities, etc. Find some common ground, and use that commonality to form the basis of some joint activity, then let it grow from there.

"I'm respectful, positive, and social "


Thats your problem


society today is disrespectful


negative


and social only if you fit into there bubble otherwise your an outsider fresh off the boat forigener


todays problem with society is that socializing has went to the internet . back yard bbq's have been replaced with lcd tv's which now have instant messengers! lool


screw society and this place we call earth with such disrescpecting , inconsidered , self centered citizens (most)

Originally posted by seedofchucky
"I'm respectful, positive, and social "


Thats your problem


society today is disrespectful


negative


and social only if you fit into there bubble otherwise your an outsider fresh off the boat forigener

todays problem with society is that socializing has went to the internet . back yard bbq's have been replaced with lcd tv's which now have instant messengers! lool


screw society and this place we call earth with such disrescpecting , inconsidered , self centered citizens (most)

Right on bro,the hell with everybody and the horse they rode in on.

reply to post by greyer


You shouldn't have a large amount of friends, one or two real friends are all you need. Most people have a lot of "acquaintances", they just call them "friends". These are the kind of people who consider the guy that stuck their head in a toilet at a bar and flushed it a hundred times...a "friend".

Then there's the idiots who get the email address of every human being they meet and add them to their email contact list. Then said idiot sends out an email to like a thousand people, most wanting to have nothing to do with said idiot. Then said idiot thinks he's cool for having such a ridiculously massive contact list and knows that all the people who receive the email will see his ridiculously massive contact list and think "WOW! this person's like really cool.....look at that ridiculously massive contact list!!

Peace

Thanks for the replies. I was thinking yesterday, I actually did have the opportunity to have a lot of friends in this new state. Yes I would not have fit in with the first of the group but it needs to be one large group. The situation I am in now is I can't hangout with one friend and another friend at the same time who are from totally different walks of life. The groups that are raised here are large and have many branches. I did not "roll with the punches" and seperated myself from those who I didn't consider the best of friends, instead of keeping them as a third level friend maybe. After a series of months on the inside I think it is important to re-enter society somehow.

Originally posted by TinkerHaus
reply to post by greyer

 

In my experience people with less friends have better friends.

What state are you in?

I'm in Arizona and from San Francisco, in my opinion society in those places are like night and day.