Confessions Of A Dark Sorceror

Originally posted by Majic
Rather, it is �Which path shall I walk next?�

There are only two paths. The side walk, and the street. The street requires something complicated with limitted room.

Both paths travel in two directions.

The direction you wish to follow can be found in the natures of Love, Humility and Pride.

But to answer your question in true matrix style.

Do not try to decide �Which path shall I walk next?� That is impossible. Instead only try to realize the truth.

What truth?

There is no I.

.


[edit on 21-8-2004 by Raphael_UO]

Originally posted by Raphael_UO
Take God's hand and let him lead you. Take a child's hand and lead them as you are lead.

These are good thoughts, one and all, in my opinion, and spoken from Love, which is forever a good place from which to speak. Please don�t mistake my humor with dismissal. As the clich� goes, I have a lot on my plate.

Considering where I stand at the moment, I hardly feel qualified to lead anyone anywhere. Heck, I�m not sure which way to go myself.

Don't get me wrong, the kids in my dream were heartbreakingly adorable and impossible not to love. My seemingly callous attitude is a matter of priorities. This driver needs to qualify for a license before he goes shuttling anyone around. And I�m not so sure �bus driver� is my dream job, even if I did happen to dream about it.

So I continue to monitor my navel for enlightenment. I have asked God for guidance, but that's not as straightforward as it seems. God is more than happy to tell me pretty much anything I want to know, except one thing: what I should do. If He wanted to order me around, he would have made me an angel and that would be that.

What�s more, I�m not sure if seeking �enlightenment� or �higher states of being� is necessarily what I should be doing, as weird as that sounds. Indeed, I begged God for ignorance! I suspect my Tarot card would be The Fool.

The good news is that I�m not in any hurry. Having gone through so much to get to this place, I�m rather enjoying the view from here!

Originally posted by Raphael_UO
Do not try to decide �Which path shall I walk next?� That is impossible. Instead only try to realize the truth.

What truth?

There is no I.

I like that!

Problem is, I bent over real far when I thought about it.

And here I stand, seeking to do exactly the opposite: define myself, and assert my unique and individual existence.

Perhaps that is the true Original Sin.

Originally posted by Majic

Originally posted by Raphael_UO
Do not try to decide �Which path shall I walk next?� That is impossible. Instead only try to realize the truth.

What truth?

There is no I.

I like that!

Problem is, I bent over real far when I thought about it.

And here I stand, seeking to do exactly the opposite: define myself, and assert my unique and individual existence.

Perhaps that is the true Original Sin.

Pride is the original sin.
God offers forgiveness.
Humility is the path you seek.
The ultimate humility is the realization that there is no I.

Originally posted by Raphael_UO
Pride is the original sin.
God offers forgiveness.
Humility is the path you seek.
The ultimate humility is the realization that there is no I.

Does ultimate humility then mean the death of the self?

There seem to be many concurrent layers of meaning to this exchange.

Originally posted by Majic
Does ultimate humility then mean the death of the self?

This I cannot teach lest someone reads my words and sees the truth without the understanding of Pride and Humility.

Seek to understand the natures of Love, Humility, and Pride. You will then be able to answer this question on your own.

I have often considered sin (a term which I believe derives from archery, meaning �to miss�) to be a �turning away from God�. In light of the notion that Pride is the original sin, this leads to some interesting concepts.

The general idea being that perhaps sin is what defines us as individuals. In other words, if we were not sinless -- meaning not somehow separated from God -- we would not exist at all!

If ultimate Humility means rejecting the self, then ultimate Pride means placing the self above all things (hmm, Satan�s Folly?).

I wonder, however, if it may not be possible to have a good sense of self-esteem and still be humble? Perhaps by being secure in one�s self without placing one�s will above those of others?

There must be a purpose for individuality, and although maybe it is a sin, in a technical sense, to be an individual, maybe that�s not necessarily a bad thing. For after all, without our existence as individuals, God would be very much alone.

There is a purpose to all of this, I am certain of it, but the purpose eludes me.

Hmm, so many things to ponder! If that�s a sin, then I am as guilty as it gets.

Originally posted by Majic
I have often considered sin (a term which I believe derives from archery, meaning �to miss�) to be a �turning away from God�. In light of the notion that Pride is the original sin, this leads to some interesting concepts.

I misspoke slightly. Pride was not the original sin. Actions or decisions based in Pride are sins. Pride and Love are both emotions. Both feel very much the same. But there are differences. The differences can be found in the nature of humility.

The general idea being that perhaps sin is what defines us as individuals. In other words, if we were not sinless -- meaning not somehow separated from God -- we would not exist at all!

We are as we were created to be. Think of a baby. How long is it before he notices his hand? How much longer still before he knows it's his hand.

A baby has no sense of self when they are born. But they are individuals.

If ultimate Humility means rejecting the self, then ultimate Pride means placing the self above all things (hmm, Satan�s Folly?).

*You see: Raphael reaching a hand into a passing bus and pulling out a book*

Isaiah 14:13

For thou hast said in thine heart, I will ascend into heaven, I will exalt my throne above the stars of God: I will sit also upon the mount of the congregation, in the sides of the north:

I wonder, however, if it may not be possible to have a good sense of self-esteem and still be humble? Perhaps by being secure in one�s self without placing one�s will above those of others?

Mark 12: 29-31 (KJV)

And Jesus answered him, The first of all the commandments [is], Hear, O Israel; The Lord our God is one Lord: And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this [is] the first commandment. And the second [is] like, [namely] this, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these.

Hmm, so many things to ponder! If that�s a sin, then I am as guilty as it gets.

1 Thessalonians 5:21

Prove all things; hold fast that which is good.

Hi Majic,

Originally posted by Majic
How is the Society of Light not a Group Entity?

They tell me that there are two major differences:

1. They do not combine their soul energies into a group consciousness for the sake of collective power.

2. They strive to become "a Light onto Oneself" which is an individualistic path.

Maybe you can make up a different symbol for yourself and your wiccan/witchcraft practices. The Pentagram is focused alot in the world as a sign of evil, the devil, stan, hell, etc.

I suggest choose your own symbol and focus using it, or perhaps a symbol that isn't meant to be regarded evil....

Majic,

Rare is it to find someone who is so logical, mystical and with such a good sense of humor all rolled into one. A number of your comments have made me laugh out loud.

You are quite welcome for whatever insight I can provide.

A mystic is someone who seeks divine communion/revelation directly, without going through a priest, rabbi, etc. By that classic definition, you are indeed a mystic.

Some of your conclusions are similar to that which is found in Solist Mysticism. One example would be your conception of souls being neurons in the mind of God.

Dr. Melvin Morse, a well-known author and pediatrician who has done research on the near-death experiences of children, prayed to understand the correlation of souls to God. The answer came back to him in a flash of insight: a "fractal." A fractal is a piece of a greater whole that contains within it the design or blueprint of that greater whole -- like a hologram.

Thus, souls are "fractals of light" of The Original Creator.

Just as many people on this planet used to attribute forces of nature and gravity to deities, so too is it a common characteristic of mystics and theologians to attribute The God Force and The Original Creator to be one and the same instead of two distinct yet related concepts.

The Light Of The God Force is an infinite, nonliving energy spectrum in the discarnate dimensions. It is the "white light at the end of the tunnel" that many near-death experiencers have reported. It is the energy that people on the Other Side use to heal and manifest telekinesis. As a soul progresses, it improves its ability to unite with The Light when it is free of matter. The higher the dimension of energy, the more powerful the soul and the more expanded the consciousness -- all centered on the ability to Love genuinely and deeply.

The Light Of The God Force has always existed and always will exist. It is the energy that allowed The Original Creator to come into being from His own probable existence. Without The Light, there could be no stars, no planets, no consciousness and no reality. It is the cosmic principle of energy in the Spirit that allowed the Universe to emerge in the first place.

Time is a condition of consciousness. When there is no consciousness, there is no linear time and therefore the constraints of something coming from nothing in linear time is not a consideration. That cosmic principle, along with The God Force, is how The Original Creator was able to slowly emerge from His own probable existence.

The Original Creator did not create The Light or the unalterable Universal Law which governs it. Instead, after He evolved into rarefied God Realization, He used The Light to a very high degree in order to manifest The Big Bang.

I also agree in the importance of cultivating Humility, as that is one of the pillars of spiritual stability or the ability to stay on a high spiritual level once it is achieved.

The other pillar of spiritual stability is Purity. This does not mean sexual abstinence per se, although when one is starting out on a spiritual path it is easier to cultivate Purity while practicing abstinence.

Purity is defined as the ability to avoid uniting with or generating lust of any kind.

Lust can be defined as emphasizing the denser aspects of matter in one's thoughts and emotions over the cultivation of purified Spirit.

Purity means having sexual relations only with Love and to reject lust whenever it is channeled into oneself.

BTW, whenever any thought or feeling "just pops in there," it is channeled from one or more discarnates (i.e., souls in the Spirit). Understanding this and focusing in on one's thoughts as they arise, gives one a clear indication as to the telepathic influence of people on the Other Side on those in the flesh.





[edit on 22-8-2004 by Paul_Richard]

Originally posted by Paul_Richard
Hi Majic,
2. They strive to become "a Light onto Oneself" which is an individualistic path.

While I do not pretend to understand your belief system, my own understanding would tell me this is a goal of pride.

Which would lead me to believe that while these entities may appear to be beings of light, they are not.

Before logging in and checking what has become a rather �different� (I think) thread, I decided when I woke up today to take stock of where I�m at, and record it here. So this is being posted without checking the status of the thread first.

These past few days have been quite a ride. I haven�t gotten much in the way of solid sleep. Many issues about who I am and where I am going are on the table. There is, indeed, much on my mind.

At the same time, despite the physical weariness that comes from wrestling with so many fundamental things, I feel better than I have in a very long time.

While there are many, many ideas trying to cram through my mental doorway at once, bunching up Three Stooges-style (�Spread out!�) as they try to get in, there is nonetheless a clarity to my thinking that is exhilarating. I feel like I am in charge of myself, and there�s a thrill to that which I daresay could become addicting.

It�s like skydiving into the cosmic void, with no parachute, relying on nothing more than my resourcefulness to save me. What a rush! And the view from here, as I fly among the stars, is simply breathtaking.

Spread out before me as I sail down toward it is an endless plain full of stalls and vendors of frames of reference, worldviews, religions, beliefs, perceptions, ideas, conventions, dogma, catma, karma, you-name-it-ma!

The thing I must keep in mind is the Golden Rule of the Vendor Stall: �You�ve got to haggle!�

But before I land, I can�t help but want to stop and appreciate the view from here. So, cartoon-style, I will magically whip out a parachute and use it. Ah, saved by cartoon physics! Now I can float above the Plain of Memes and get a better perspective on things.

As an afterthought, I check my pockets: nope, no money. So whatever I �buy� is going to have to come free, because I can�t afford anything more expensive, and I�m really not in the mood to buy on credit (have you seen the interest rates these guys are charging?).

Perhaps that is the true Way to Enlightenment: Empty your spiritual pockets!

I�m not so sure if I am �enlightened�, but not having pockets full of cash does make me feel �lightened�.

So much activity below, the Plain is bustling with commerce. Vendors vending, hawkers hawking and shoppers shopping. Before I try to find a parking spot, I think I�ll just float up here for a while and take in the view.

Originally posted by Raphael_UO

Originally posted by Paul_Richard
Hi Majic,
2. They strive to become "a Light onto Oneself" which is an individualistic path.

While I do not pretend to understand your belief system, my own understanding would tell me this is a goal of pride.

Which would lead me to believe that while these entities may appear to be beings of light, they are not.

Solist Mysticism embraces the Mormon concept that everyone has the spiritual potential to eventually become God Realized to the extent of being able to manifest one's own idyllic planet (sic). The difference is we have a very clear methodology in getting there.

This is not pride but a very constructive spiritual focus and an innovative approach to raising consciousness, called Chakra Radiance.

To evolve into having power in the Spirit and to only use that energy constructively and in service to The Light.

If we limit ourselves to existing only on the lower levels, harboring the belief we are not worthy to become co-creators with The Original Creator, how are we to find ultimate happiness and satisfaction with our souls?

We cannot.

We must have the courage to strive to new levels of spiritual development and take the responsiblity to use our power in heaven only for Good.

Majic,

If anything, this is one of the most entertaining threads I've had the pleasure of participating in. *L*

Enjoy the ride of spiritual and metaphysical contemplation. It is one of the benefits of being mystically inclined.

If there�s one thing there�s no shortage of in this world, it�s people with ideas to sell.

It doesn�t matter what the idea may be, there�s always somebody who wants you to agree with them on it. This seems to be as true in the spiritual world as in the physical world. Indeed, they seem to mirror one another in meaningful ways.

As of this writing, the self-titles �Perception Manager� and �Psyoperator� appear under my name. I have studied these things in more depth than most, and in less depth than some. Perception Management and Psychological Warfare are fascinating topics in themselves. Illuminating, I daresay.

Here, in my spiritual quest, I raise them by analogy. I easily recognize classic perception management and psychological warfare tactics being used in the spiritual arena. Well, many of them, because the awful truth is that even a seasoned psywarrior is never immune to their influence. I guess being �seasoned� means coming to know this.

While there is a budding science to these tactics, they are -- as I think everyone in the communities that use them would agree -- still the sovereign domain of artists and practitioners of the craft of shaping the thoughts of others. In other words, it�s a talent.

I suppose someone with appropriate talent could fashion a thread such as this to lead people to think in certain ways -- if they were good. But in my case, anyway, fan of that art though I am, this is truly a quest for self.

But I think I am well-armed to be suspicious. Perhaps it is vane to seek a higher spiritual path. Indeed, what is a �higher spiritual path� and who decides what makes it �higher�?

I wrote of the Plain of Memes, using the analogy of a bazaar, but really, it�s more like a Sea of Memes, one in which it can be very hard to stay afloat. It is all too easy to allow them to flood into our mental boats and sweep us away into the tempestuous and turbulent currents of the thoughts of others.

Hmm, note to self: �Quantum Memetics�? Maybe a fusion of that and Chaos Theory.

Perhaps all thought, spiritual as well as physical (i.e. �mundane� �real world� thinking in our pulsating brains) is essentially of this character: ideas or memes in constant flux, bubbling to the top and becoming strong through repetition and reinforcement or percolating to the bottom and disappearing from disuse.

The Society of Light (SoL) paradigm for spiritualism seems to correspond somewhat closely to this. But in the SoL paradigms I also see the signs of desire for things to be as they wish, which might obscure that which is truly there -- if there is any truth to the idea that there is an objective spiritual reality at all, which is not clear to me at this time.

To desire to seek a higher state of being is, nonetheless, a desire. It is founded in a value system that prizes �advancement�. But what form does such advancement truly take? I sense that there is a paradox there.

I remain fairly well convinced that Will is the coin of the spiritual realm. It is the basis for defining what is �real� or �not real�, perhaps even to defining them in sufficient consistency and stability that they become �physical�.

Does our physical world exist as a projection of spiritual Will? I am beginning to think so. After all, when you stop to think about it, everything that we think of as �solid� or �physical� is that way only by virtue of how it interacts with other such things.

In other words, the substance of what we perceive as matter and energy only truly exist in relationship to one another.

A Theory of Physical Relativity? There I find myself, instead of buying something off the shelf, synthesizing my own paradigm for All That Is.

Since my spiritual pockets are empty, I have forced myself to bypass the stalls and indulge in a �do it yourself� project, cobbling together my own view of Life, the Universe and Everything from spare memes lying around on the ground.

Sometimes, just being a penniless kid playing in the dirt is a bliss unto itself!

As this thread gets weirder and weirder, my impulse for pouring out my own benighted thinking on these matters grows proportionately. Interesting. I wonder about that.

Here I speak of people pushing memes while I myself push memes. Hypocrisy? Well, I�m not really complaining about people pushing memes, just observing. I�m not sure we can communicate at all without �pushing memes�. In fact, I am certain we cannot. So if it�s an evil, let�s consider it a necessary evil.

I have mentioned that I talk to God. I am also fairly sure that such discussions are self-illusory. Indeed, I have asked God about that and the answer is �Yes, but��, with the �but� being a very big �but� (does my �but� really look that big?).

The �but� is this: I cannot understand God �in the raw�. There is no foundation for such understanding. Thus my own consciousness limits my understanding of God, is the best I can work with for now (and forever, I suppose), and that is why God must speak to me in my own voice. There is simply no other way.

I have meditated on this many times in the past, and decided to apply my natural (�God-given�?) empathy to seeking to understand God�s condition in the hope of better understanding Him.

My primary frame of reference for understanding God comes from western religious sources, so I suppose that is a caveat. However, in discussing my notions of God with my mother, who is much better-educated on these matters, she has pointed out that there are many cross-cultural agreements with my �findings�.

So with a nod to the usual caveats, and with a tacit agreement that words are but the crudest tools for work such as this�

In The Beginning

Consider what it would be like to find yourself aware, but without any memories or senses. You cannot see, hear, smell, taste or touch. You cannot perceive anything except that you exist. You are utterly alone, and have no frame of reference whatsoever.

You only know that you are thinking, self-aware, and that is not really something you understand except in a very fundamental sense, with no definition for it, or anything else.

But who are you? There is no one, nothing outside of you. You have no body, only consciousness. There is no time or space, or even concepts of these things at all. There is nothing around you, nothing to be perceived. Not even darkness.

I don�t know about you, but personally, I find the idea absolutely terrifying. Imagine what that would be like, and you can perhaps have a glimpse of what it would be like to be God �in the Beginning�.

So what do you do? What can you do? You think. But you think without the benefit of any frame of reference outside yourself. You don�t even have a basis for what we would consider �basic thoughts�, since those are typically found outside ourselves.

�Time� passes, except that there is no time. There is no past or future, only the Present. No cause and effect. No constraints except one: you are utterly Alone.

Something Happens. It happens not due to any volition on your part, it just happens. In fact, it happens instantly, so fast that you are unaware that it had not already happened.

What is it? Your mind explodes.

From the keystone of a single thought, multitudes of thoughts break out, building upon one another, defining one another, creating new thoughts in every manner.

It is an explosion of thoughts, an instantaneous rush of every possible concept gushing through your mind. They regenerate one upon another, so that more thoughts beget more thoughts which beget more thoughts without any limit. It never ends.

The explosion of thoughts composes all that you are, it is inherent to you and inseparable from you. You have defined Yourself. You have become God.

Let There Be Light

This explosion of thoughts, which is an explosion of being, is Creation. God created God. God is �real� only within Himself. There is no concept of Outside, it cannot be known.

Within God�s elemental consciousness, which itself is the source of all things, thoughts coalesce into structures. These structures in turn coalesce into other structures, guided by the basic �physics� of God�s thoughts, the rules themselves self-defining as thoughts pour forth, by God�s Will.

Structures of thought are built upon one another, until one structure becomes self-aware. God has �reproduced� consciousness within Himself. Now an explosion of structures of self-aware thought occurs, each building upon one another, interacting and regenerating. As at first, they grow without bound, unlimited.

God�s consciousness has thus Evolved, from a simple, fundamental, individual viewpoint into a congeries of ever-changing, ever more complex, ever-dynamic perspectives, each but a tiny effigy of the original Consciousness that gave birth to them.

This is the Mind of God. These are the spirits, and these are our souls.

Light and Darkness

I feel that I am pushing the limits of a discussion forum thread, so I�ll cut off here with some notions.

To use analogies, the creation of thought is Light. The destruction of thought is Darkness. Life, Death. Positive, Negative. Yin, Yang. All analogies for creation and destruction. Existence and nonexistence. Each dependent, one on another.

These are definitions of things that we may choose or discard. We are unable, as conscious beings, to perceive anything without the mechanism of symbols. They are the foundations of our thought.

Thus our perception of Absolute Truth is inherently limited by both the fact that we use symbols, and the nature of those which we choose.

The Path

It seems that my spiritual quest has come to a point of choosing not only a spiritual paradigm, but more profoundly, choosing the very symbols upon which that paradigm will rest.

But I see more. Perhaps, if my focus is clear, I can -- with great care -- select the very symbols which are the foundation for my thoughts themselves.

Perhaps by doing so, I may better come to understand That Which Is.

I am long past caring for whether or not there is any �power� in this. There is something much, much better to be found here!

Despite appearances to the contrary, I am reading what everyone else has posted here.

Please don�t mistake a lack of a specific response on my part to a post on your part as my ignoring it.

It would be more accurate, perhaps, to think of me as �consuming� your posts, incorporating them into my thoughts as I chew, swallow and digest the ideas bouncing around here.

This process has profound meaning for me, as I am truly and literally making some Very Big Choices regarding Where To Go From Here.

In light of my intimate ties to the Internet, it seems only fitting that I do this online.

But this no doubt makes for probably some of the most bizarre and self-indulgent reading that a hapless �Net traveler might chance upon.

Then again, there�s always something even weirder and more self-indulgent out there�

Self-discovery is, by its nature, self-focused.

I cannot know the nature of the very first thought, from which all other thoughts sprang, but I can conjecture.

I think the First Thought was God�s initial moment of self-awareness.

The �proto-thought� simply being �I AM�.

Just a thought.

It is with gratitude to the contributors to this thread that I can take a small step down my new Path with some confidence.

Now I understand the true nature of all forms of sorcery, whether they may be labeled �Light� or �Dark�.

Sorcery is an act of control, a projection of will, by its nature an act of domination over another spirit. I no longer wish to do this.

To think that it is possible to summon spirits without, in so doing, exerting some form of control over them is an illusion.

Indeed, why summon them at all if not for one�s own reasons, and therefore, in service to one�s will?

I will not be pouring out salt circles or pentacles anymore. There is no point to it, for me, anyway.

There is a twinge of regret within me as I lay my Sorceror�s Robe to rest in the closet of my mind, but it is like the sentimental tug one might have in remembering childhood.

The trappings of sorcery have their own appeal, like a shiny bicycle or that BB gun every boy has always wanted. But they are, nonetheless, mere tokens of my spiritual youth, and fit me no more.

I have outgrown sorcery, and bid it farewell at last. That extra salt I have in the cupboard? It�s just salt.

New paths await me.

So If I am no longer going to summon spirits, then what, pray tell, do I plan to do?

Meditate, meditate, meditate!

I have chosen to forgo initiating action against others -- at least for now. The assumption of a passive role means substituting observation for action.

In other words, it�s time to do some serious cogitatin�!

It is not lost on me that all of this self-discovery stuff may be nothing more than the fashioning of a new, more satisfactory illusion for myself. Perhaps so.

But there is a sense I get, an important sense, that in deciding to cast off old assumptions I may accomplish more than merely replacing them with new assumptions.

Maybe I might catch a glimpse of the Truth. Just maybe.

What of my fears that piercing the veil of illusion that is the nature of our existence may itself lead to a death of self?

Well, as a greater philosopher than I so aptly put it: No pain, no gain!

Time to meditate again, and perhaps get some sleep. All this thinking is hard work, and leaves me physically exhausted.

I will close this post with a quote from a member of my old boot camp company, oh so many years ago. He was not known to be a deep thinker, to put it politely, and he entertained us greatly one day by proclaiming:

�I don�t like thinking, it gives me a headache!�

As time goes by, I am coming to suspect that he may have been much wiser than us all.