Morbid Obesity and Being Stuck to a Couch, page 2

I don't see it as a "blame" issue.... more of a cautionary tale, perhaps.

Sure they should have done something, but what? Can't force her. No guarantee they could have her declared incompetent and committed involuntarily before it had gone too far. So then what? Maybe there came a point where all they could do was bathe her on the couch because nothing else worked. And most people won't go to the authorities if it's mental. If she were laying there bleeding to death, someone would not hesitate to call for help for her. But she was laying there dying slowly and horribly, so no one did anything to get her any help. Trust me, if you're laying on a couch in your own waste becoming one with the fabric, you are not in your right mind and are incapable of competent decision making. Maybe at that point they can commit you, but by then it's too late and you die during surgery.

Ultimately, yes it's her own "fault". But the bigger picture begs the question of compassion and how far it goes. How much of one's self is anyone willing to put forth. In this case it would have taken only a few words in the right ear. I can't believe nobody could smell that stench. Can't believe that NOBODY knew that SOMETHING was wrong. Her "husband" could have gone to social services saying "My wife is almost 500 lbs, our apartment is an outhouse with plates, I'm a drunk and we need help!". Compassion. Concern. It goes farther toward resolving problems than hate or constant condemnation. Maybe he could have gotten help as well and stopped the drinking that was obviously blinding him to their true situation. They could have both had a better quality of life. It's a terrible shame, but too often someone is drowning and their only help closeby is someone else who's drowning.