Disclaimer: Please know first that I'm not always capable of organizing my thoughts, so if I run on, or seem disjointed, I apologize in advance.
Also know that I was unsure where to post this, I decided on "Rant" for reasons which may or may not become obvious. The title is one of my
favorite things to say, and the following seems to define it perfectly.
Yesterday, I went outside. For personal reasons that are irrelevant to this thread, going outside is something I hardly ever venture to do. What is
relevant is that it limits my scope of everyday life, and how people live in general. And while none of this is news to me... eh... lets get on with
the story.
My neighbor was having a small gathering, and my original intention was not to join, but I was invited and since it was really a beautiful day I
decided to sit for a while (just in case timeframe is important to anyone, it went from around 5 to 8pm).
It didn't take me long to realize how completely unaware these people are of my world (and I of theirs). The majority of their topics revolved
around things I would consider "gossip". Between gossip, a little "reminiscence", and near non-existant takes on whats going on globally.
At one point someone brought up the weather, and I got excited thinking perhaps we could discuss the various theories of WHY the weather is seemingly
so dramatic these days. I began listing some examples like Texas and Arizona on fire, the snow in Utah (and others), the tornadoes and flooding in
the middle of the country, the fact that we even had some earthquakes in our area which is highly unusual. I was met with blank stares and an obvious
dismissal of "yeah the hole in the ozone is getting bigger"..... I started to say "some people don't believe that" but it was too late, they had
already gone off on another topic of interest (my neighbor's boyfriends cousins mom doing something with someone, I don't know... I don't care.
Important to them I guess).
It was reasonably difficult, since they rarely stopped talking long enough for me to even get a sentence in. For awhile I sat back and just watched
them fight over center stage with "my gossip is better than your gossip".
At other points in conversation I played the opportunist. I tried to incorporate things like HAARP, Elenin, Anonymous, Libya, the Economy, Volcanoes,
Radiation from Fukushima, Ron Paul, even Aliens...
Response Examples: Never heard of it, never heard of it, never heard of it, yeah war sucks but its good for the economy (dismissed), never heard of
it, I thought Fukushima was under control (its not), then why isn't it in the news (cause MSM is controlled), you and your conspiracies, can't be
bothered with politics, and a hearty LOL on aliens.
Please understand these are NOT stupid people.... and its not my intention to present them as such. But they are uninformed at the very least, and
with all the immediate dismissals, I must contend they really don't want to know whats going on. I suppose in hindsight I could have forced them to
listen, but I'm near positive they wouldn't have actually heard what I was saying.
At first I was angry, I didn't let them know this, its easy to blend in these situations - I just kept it to myself. With the trouble I have
absorbing all the information out there, I can't imagine my dumping it on them all at once would do any good.
After a while, a sense of superiority crept in. Instead of indulging that feeling, I questioned it. I encounter so many people online who believe
they're privy to information that no one else is, and in reality, their ideas (or beliefs if I may) are usually based on false logic, psuedoscience,
and/or little nuggets of information they hear and store for later spewing - so no, I am definitely NOT superior - I know my ideas are flawed, I'll
never know ALL the facts to make a real educated decision on most of these topics - but is there an excuse for knowing NOTHING?
Then I went into denial. Of course they know, they just don't want to talk about it.. I can't really be the minority here can I? (1 of 6 people...)
but of course that idea failed quickly since I heard with my own ears the responses they gave (I'm still reeling from the hole in the ozone
comment).
Now, I'm depressed and accepting. I am so powerless. This whole scenario made me question myself rather than them. I know whats up with them.
They're consumers. They're concerned with the materialistic things and use the drama as entertainment only. If its not wrapped up in a pretty
package and shown on the 11-o-clock news, its not worthy. And I know it isn't their fault, thats the society that we live in.
Since these are generally happy people (in their opinion)... What is up with me? Why am I so concerned? Should I be concerned? Should I find a way to
go back to that way of life? Will I be happier? But then I remembered this is one of the reasons why I chose to leave it... because its unaware.
It's like... Facebook, only animated...
Finally at the end of it all I just said f-it, and dove into the gossiping. If you can't beat'm, join'm? I hate to admit it but it was too easy
to conform and I ended up actually having some conversation, and enjoying the majority of the evening.
An amazing roller coaster ride, in one 3 hour sit down....
I'm leaving out a bunch of things but this is long enough, I think I got my point across.
Finally, if anyone wonders why I'm sharing this... I was driven, compelled to get it out
Call it therapy.
Much Love ♥ ~ Ð