59 Year old "AIrman"...reportedly lost in bathtub

Time to take a break from all the conspiracy theories, what if's, and highly charged debates.

Here is a story that is full of the hopes and dreams of a man, George W Bush, an ex-member of the Texas Air National Guard, trying to become the youngest person to circumnavigate his bathtub with a rubber duck.

His story and adventures should be a testimony to all that is right and good in this world. It is about hopes, dreams, ignorance and stupidity.

Earlier today his personal distress beacon went off and he is presumed lost without a sponge, away from his rubber duck and 4 seconds from any type of shampoo and conditioner. Sadly, he is most probably alive and alone in the middle of his bathtub. For those of you that believe, the rubber duck needs your prayers.

Mods,
isn't this political trolling?
ALERT sent.