Why does Satan seem cool and God seem like a jerk?

It seems that as some Christians (and members of other religions for that matter) paint the World, God comes across like a total jerk and Satan seems like a cool guy.

As Certain Christians see it:

Satan will offer you a beer, God will take your beer away.

Satan will get your girlfriend to try sexy outfits and acrobatic sexual acts, God is a c---blocker.

Satan wants the poor to get health care, God does not want to jeopardize health insurance companies' profits.

Satan wants the US to stop bombing other countries for no good reason, God wants the US to bomb more countries.

Satan likes: the Beattles, Led Zeppelin, Metallica, Dr. Dre, Nirvana, Ice Cube, and Ozzy Osborne. God likes Christian Rap.

Satan likes: NPR, CNN, and the Economist. God likes Fox News.

Satan is okay with gay dudes. God says he hates gay dudes, but he turns tricks with male prostitutes in bathrooms.

Satan says the world as we know it is in peril unless we stop polluting. God says we should keep on polluting and scientists are full of s---.

Satan thinks that every country matters. God is an American and thinks only America matters.

hmmm, maybe it's because you're listening to Satan and not God.

It's just a thought I had. I really do not think it's that cool in hell so I don't associate cool and Satan/hell together.

here's the way I associate things'
Satan
have sex with hot girl but get STD's
you suffer
God
have sex with no std's, might require committment from both partners
you don't suffer

Satan
drink to your heart's content but go out and wreck your car or kill someone
you or someone else suffers
God
drink but in moderation
no harm done to anyone. In fact a couple drinks may help your heart.

Satan
lies and deceives you
you suffer forever in hell
God
the truth will set you free
You enjoy not living a lie.

What seems cool is only one's perspective.
My two cents.

reply to post by orionthehunter


You seem to be a person that believes in common sense and moderation, qualities that cannot be found in religious fanatics. Religious fanatics should be portraying God as someone that does the right thing, not a party pooper. Relgious fanatics should be portraying Satan as someone that does things that are really bad like hurt people.

reply to post by hotpinkurinalmint


Actually it was Ben Franklin that said Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. There is drunkenness in the Bible and it doesn't always end in disaster, though usually it does. It was also Ben Franklin who was a staunch supporter of moderation.

Read the Old Testament, God is one mean hombre, smiting people left and right, killing the first born, sending people to war, commanding the Israelites to commit genocide or take slaves and of course there's that time he drowns EVERYONE except Noah and his family horrifically in a flood.

The God of the Old Testament is, generally speaking, evil. The New Testament version is a bit nicer to us humans but apparently can't think of a better plan to save us than getting his own son killed. What's worse is that he turns back into that nasty Old testament wrath dealer in Revelations, letting loose all manner of torment and agony for no apparent reason just before damning the majority of human beings to a fiery pit of torture and despair for ETERNITY.

That being said Satan is not depicted as cool, aside from the appeal of rebellion and "doing your own thing".

[edit on 22-4-2010 by Titen-Sxull]

However many points you might be making, your OP is disrespectful and disgusting. I'm sorry your perspectives are so warped, even though I know how you mean things.

One more time, The devil rules culture, and gets scared when we categorize and trend it in terms of its evil effects on humanity. Sidestep culture.

God is perfect, there is no other perspective from which to accurately begin a sound understanding. From perfection all things fall into their place, every justice, every knowing that presents itself against Him, and no one is the wiser while they're still in the woods about how things really work.

There are physical enemies, and there are spiritual ones. It's profoundly better to focas on the spiritual ones, because the physical leaders, as nexus points of spiritual darkness, keep us captive. If you can find it in your hearts to pray for evil leader, to free them from possession, then perhaps you have found some wisdom in this life. It's what you make of it.

watch.pair.com...

I'm disappointed in this thread, I was hoping it would have some real substance to it after I read the title.

Yes, some christians have a warped sense of reality, just like any other group.

I was hoping you'd give examples from the Bible and not just some random list of other people's views about god.

reply to post by hotpinkurinalmint


That was absolutely, by far, one of the best opening posts I've read in my life.
I'm with you on this, my friend.
I'm currently on another thread regarding "god" and "evil" aliens...or "demons" as the OP describes them.
Threw out a few pretty good questions, but was met with "may g_d bless you".
Um...what is that nonsense?
Not saying I believe in the christian god/Satan dichotomy, but honestly, given the choice between sides...it's fairly evident which I'd choose.
Sit on a boring cloud and praise some ego-driven, bad-attitude, whinging, sore-loser, emo kid, or have an eternity-long kegger by the lake of fire with beautiful devil girls and all the veggie burgers I can eat?
Yeah...tough choice.

The more I read about the relentless attacks on God, the more I know we are closer to end times.

Satan is playing you and you think he is cool ?

PS read Revelation, they describe you in there. It might open your eyes.

Originally posted by orionthehunter

God
have sex with no std's, might require committment from both partners
you don't suffer

Clearly you've never been married...
*2*

Do you have kids?

I am a father to my kids. They don't always like me, but they respect me. And they're turning out just fine.

Don't always have to agree with God, but do respect Him, or He can make your life hell.

Originally posted by LoneExplorer
The more I read about the relentless attacks on God, the more I know we are closer to end times.

Satan is playing you and you think he is cool ?

PS read Revelation, they describe you in there. It might open your eyes.

Um, no.
PS...learn to think for yourself.

Greetings Matthew Dark.

Do you think such utopias will really last forever? Will there not be a point of answering for the injustices we have committed in our life? Thank you for taking your side though, I respect the courage to do so. But how can a cold austerity ever replace a warm smile?

...innocence can be rewon. Virtue is its own reward, and is reward enough.

What you dont realize is that GOD IS SATAN!

Originally posted by 911stinks
Do you have kids?

I am a father to my kids. They don't always like me, but they respect me. And they're turning out just fine.

Don't always have to agree with God, but do respect Him, or He can make your life hell.

really? i thought god gave us free will so we can do whatever the hell we want without him interfering? so which is it? is he going to make my life hell or is he going to wait til i die?

Originally posted by Northwarden
However many points you might be making, your OP is disrespectful and disgusting. I'm sorry your perspectives are so warped, even though I know how you mean things.

One more time, The devil rules culture, and gets scared when we categorize and trend it in terms of its evil effects on humanity. Sidestep culture.

God is perfect, there is no other perspective from which to accurately begin a sound understanding. From perfection all things fall into their place, every justice, every knowing that presents itself against Him, and no one is the wiser while they're still in the woods about how things really work.

There are physical enemies, and there are spiritual ones. It's profoundly better to focas on the spiritual ones, because the physical leaders, as nexus points of spiritual darkness, keep us captive. If you can find it in your hearts to pray for evil leader, to free them from possession, then perhaps you have found some wisdom in this life. It's what you make of it.

watch.pair.com...

oh yeah? then why do religious people have " beware of dog" signs on their fences instead of beware of god? why do religious people get medical treatment when they clearly think god decide when they go? why do catholics force people to convert before marriage when god gave us free will? why do god hate homo yet your leaders are pedophile? if the pope is so holy how come he doesn't have magical powers? if god is so giving how ocme churches need donations?

if satan is so evil how come he never says a damn thing? if satan is so evil hwo come god is always attacking him? how can satan be evil if he never does anything to anyone? satan don't ask for your money, he doesn't make you waste your sundays. he doesn't threaten you with hell, he doesn't lie to your kids about heaven.

if there was a war between heaven and hell i'll fight for satan.



[edit on 22-4-2010 by DOADOA]

Originally posted by orionthehunter
hmmm, maybe it's because you're listening to Satan and not God.



here's the way I associate things'
Satan
have sex with hot girl but get STD's
you suffer
God
have sex with no std's, might require committment from both partners
you don't suffer

Satan
drink to your heart's content but go out and wreck your car or kill someone
you or someone else suffers
God
drink but in moderation
no harm done to anyone. In fact a couple drinks may help your heart.

That's kind of how I see it. It's a trick. If you follow the ways of Satan, it will seem fun at first but soon you will have an STD, backstab your friends and be in prison - all the while blaming the girl, your friends and the police. Things only get worse from there, as none of your friends in prison trust you, you don't trust them, even Satan turns on you once you don't have anything to offer him anymore and he's taken it all from you.

Originally posted by DOADOA

Originally posted by 911stinks
Do you have kids?

I am a father to my kids. They don't always like me, but they respect me. And they're turning out just fine.

Don't always have to agree with God, but do respect Him, or He can make your life hell.

really? i thought god gave us free will so we can do whatever the hell we want without him interfering? so which is it? is he going to make my life hell or is he going to wait til i die?

You'll make your own life hell with your own unhealthy choices.

I don't agree with your idea of satan being the "cool" guy and God, being the "bad" guy. From what I read, It seems as if you're associating God with conservative republicans, and I do not believe that that's the case. God is all about love, not war. Satan is all about evil, not anything good.
When satan offered Eve the apple from the tree of knowledge in the garden of Eden, he told her that it would open her eyes,(illuminated, enlightened) and that she would be able to have knowledge of good and evil, when before she was only able to know of the good. He promised her wisdom, which she fell for. Even King Solomon said that too much wisdom could be fatal. God is the all powerful and all loving because he is the only entity able to be able to have knowledge of good and evil, yet always choose good.

We humans are unable to fathom what its like to be omniscient. In order to judge God, we must first have complete knowledge of everything...meaning we must know everything that has happened in the past, everything that is happening in the present, and everything that will happen in the future to even understand his plan for humanity.

Originally posted by darkbake

Originally posted by DOADOA

Originally posted by 911stinks
Do you have kids?

I am a father to my kids. They don't always like me, but they respect me. And they're turning out just fine.

Don't always have to agree with God, but do respect Him, or He can make your life hell.

really? i thought god gave us free will so we can do whatever the hell we want without him interfering? so which is it? is he going to make my life hell or is he going to wait til i die?

You'll make your own life hell with your own unhealthy choices.

really? just a few minutes ago it was god who would make my life hell and now i'm going to do it? make up your mind.

Originally posted by Northwarden
Greetings Matthew Dark.

Do you think such utopias will really last forever? Will there not be a point of answering for the injustices we have committed in our life? Thank you for taking your side though, I respect the courage to do so. But how can a cold austerity ever replace a warm smile?

...innocence can be rewon. Virtue is its own reward, and is reward enough.

Well hello there and thank you for the warm greetings.
Well, to be perfectly fair, I never mentioned a utopian society, I was just illustrating a point.
Personally, I don't believe in heaven or hell.
Now, I haven't committed any real injustices to speak of.
Never killed anyone.
Never raped anyone.
Never hurt a child.
Never hurt an animal (I'm a strict veggie).
I am, however, a behavioral health worker dedicated to easing the pains associated with severe mental illness.
And...I'm a dedicated nursing student.

Yes, I drink, I smoke, I have sex (with my beautiful, smart, sexy, law-student, animal rights activist girlfriend), I am naturally rebellious, I am filled with rage and I have a lot of hatred inside me.
By the average fundamentalist christian standards, I am exactly how your god made me.
So, I accept my nature, regardless of where it came from and I don't have to take anything on faith because it's not in my nature.
So, for people who walk a different path to try to force their beliefs on me...to condemn me to some awful afterlife that I don't believe in just because I'm different than them (even though I live a fairly good life) says more about the nature of their character than my own.
That is just wrong, and no one can convince me otherwise.
So, if people like that are truly representative of that god, then I will personally lead the rebellion and topple his oppressive empire...as he only has the power that people give up and transfer to him.
I refuse to give up my power, however massive or minute it may be...it's mine and mine alone.
Humans delude themselves into believing that they really matter in the grand scheme of things, that the universe somehow needs them.
It simply isn't so.
Humans have developed religions that place themselves at the center of the universe and elevated their importance as though what happens to us will cause a ripple effect through out all existence.
We'll all be dead one day, and no one will even notice.
We are a fleeting moment in time...a tiny, tiny drop in an infinite ocean.
We only matter to one another, to us.
We are important only to each other, and that is all.
I don't need to have the fate of the universe resting on my shoulders, I don't need a god to fear...or tell me how to act.
I will do as I please, because I know right from wrong.
I matter to the people who love me, and that is enough.
I care nothing for the god that causes people to live in fear, to cower in the corner for fear of reprisal should they displease their master.
I have no master, I don't need your god.
Okay, I believe I've eaten up enough space for my reply.
I'm gonna go make another cup of tea, smoke a cigarette and eat some nutterbutters.