My Experiences When I was Young

Hey all, been here a while, just haven't posted. I'll get to the point. When I was younger, I used to get on these certain trains of thought, like "Why are we here" and "What is humanity" and "Who is this person" Its kinda hard to explain from my perspective, but I would eventually get in this mode. It felt like I was detached from reality. I was conscious, not sleeping, and most of the time, just sitting somewhere. I can't explain the feeling, but it was strange. When I say strange, I mean foreign to me. I asked one of my professors about it and he had no idea.

I haven't thought anything about it until recently when I tried to get into meditation. (Still trying if anyone has any advice or pointers haha) but I want to know if anyone has ever had an experienced anything like this. To go into more detail, it was almost like an out of body experience, but it wasn't like in the movies where you can actually watch yourself (like a 3rd person shooter) but I felt unbound by, for lack of a better word, humanity. But I did not have a sense of freedom, it was more a sense of curiosity, I began to ask myself questions. One example, my mom came in the room and I was like "Who is this woman? Why does she act the way she does? Why does she care" etc. Obviously I knew, but when I asked the question, I started to think down that road. These sessions happened before high school, as that is the last time I can recall having an experience. Physically, the closest thing I can compare it to is a concussion (for those of you who have had one) where you think strange, you know you think strange, you know you don't normally think this way, but you still do.

Thanks for reading guys, I appreciate it. I figured I would try to figure out what it was before I forget about it. Feel free to ask any questions, I am an open book!

I think I know what you mean as I occasionally get like this too, usually after a 'cup of tea'. I think what you are describing is objective thought. Not many people have the ability to ask questions beyond their own perspective and fewer still have the inclination.

If I'm right, you'll come up with some very interesting ideas, and with those ideas will come more and more questions.

Go forth my my friend. You follow a noble path!

Interesting, I've had similiar experiences of detachment from those around me and found myself also questioning "Who, What, Why" in regards to people in my life and our relationships. I have no explanation or reasoning to answer your query because you'll probably have to come a conclusion as to the reasoning behind these experiences on your own.
In my case, I find that my detachment allows me to see these relations in a different perspective from what the relations says it should be, I find myself more aware of how the other person "sees" me as individual and as a relation. Not sure if any of that will help you but at least you know you're NOT alone in that kind of thinking.

Edit to add a word I forget to type

[edit on 9-11-2009 by worldwatcher]

This type of thinking started with me in my mid teens when I first experimented with cannabis. It was all questioning everything and the feeling of detachment to the lifestyle around me was greater than ever. The whole pre-set life that the government sets up to be born, learn, learn, learn, get a job from that learning to pay for yourself to live, don't question a thing, pay your taxes and ultimately, die. No it didn't appeal to me so I was left with this feeling like why are all my peers so materialistic ? I still have this feeling although my defination on it is now not detachment as in I'm different and alone (a bad thing) but more I AM unique as we all are, but I believe I'm on the right path and that this feeling of detachment is more of a feeling of umm, I can't explain it's like this feeling is a build up, like I'm waiting for something to happen, something different that's ment to happen and I know it's going to happen and that everythings going to be fine and I'll be better off than the sheeple. So I just carry on with my own life the way I want how ever I want. I am free and I don't have a wrong in my life or a worry about how I'm going to survive.
I hope that made sense and you can get something out of it.

Yes, I can relate. As to what it is, there are only guesses and suppositions ultimately. But how relevant are the specifics really as long as the interpretation fits?

I call it a 'higher self', an aspect of our existence which observes what we experience and interprets it as we do, but by different standards. It is not so much a part of this reality and so relationships appear there much the way an insect may appear to us.

From this 'higher self' come dreams and visions which is why, I believe, they can seem so senseless to us. They are interpretations based on a different value system. Almost another language that must be interpreted first in one direction and then back again. If you've ever used an automated language interpreter it's a great illustration to me.

Most schools of esoteric and metaphysical thought are at their core teaching more efficient communication between this 'higher self' and our material selves. As the bridge between becomes more firm so the information becomes more 'viable' or easier to understand. And so we begin to transcend the boundaries of space and time, the fabric of 'reality' itself because this 'higher self' exists beyond them.

As for meditation, having had these experiences, you are likely already where you need to be. Don't focus on prescribed techniques would be my advice. Try them and find what works, but there's no need to struggle with finding what another person has already found. And if you're anything like me in this area, you'll likely find most standard techniques of meditation somewhat distracting and therefore useless.

The essence of meditation is relaxation. Just find a comfortable place, set an appropriate mood with whatever paraphernalia attracts you (music, candles, incense, what have you) and then simply relax.

What you experienced in your youth is already meditation, after a fashion. And once ingrained it isn't forgotten. You just need to allow yourself to return to that space again. You could be amazed at how much you find and how quickly.

Peaceful journeys.

Hey guys, thanks for the replies!

I didn't know anyone else had these experiences haha, but my friends have told me that I am pretty smart, or as one said "A Genius" (unlikely) but I have found that I am very empathetic, and I look at things in perspective.

Traveler: Do you know any literature that would help me get back into meditation? What has worked for you? Or can you direct my research towards someone/some school? My professor recommended Tich Nah Han (sp?) i believe in zen buddhism. I just can't seem to get back in these mindsets and I really want to be able to.

Eathis: I can relate to you with the pot haha but when I did it, I felt less detached than what I'm talking about in my preteens, and with the ganj, it was less clear and more clouded. Thanks for the input! Wish you well!

World: How do you personally get into those mindsets?

Dig: Thanks alot, and yes, I did get some interesting answers haha

Thanks again guys, enjoy your weekends!

Originally posted by midnightrider07
Hey guys, thanks for the replies!

I didn't know anyone else had these experiences haha, but my friends have told me that I am pretty smart, or as one said "A Genius" (unlikely) but I have found that I am very empathetic, and I look at things in perspective.

You're welcome. And it seems we have other things in common as well.

Traveler: Do you know any literature that would help me get back into meditation? What has worked for you? Or can you direct my research towards someone/some school? My professor recommended Tich Nah Han (sp?) i believe in zen buddhism. I just can't seem to get back in these mindsets and I really want to be able to.

These days I generally just sit comfortably, focus my eyes toward my pineal chakra and allow the 'tingling' to flow over me which brings immediate peace and relaxation. This is our natural state rather than an achievement. If you are having difficulties it is only a temporary obstruction to work around and pass. Below I've listed some 'tools' I've used to help pinpoint and remove such obstructions.

The single best piece of 'meditative' literature for me has been the Stephen Mitchell translation of the Tao Te Ching, this particular translation because I find it beautifully written. You may also be interested in the works of Mantak Chia.

I've used binaural beats to great, but not lasting, effect. Which is to say very effective for a time, but less so after a period. But if nothing else they can provide an excellent 'trigger'. There are commercial products available as well as some freely available in different places here at ATS as well as some freely available over the internet.

Do you have a mala (prayer bead string)? I've also found this effective in focusing my attention as well as any sort of 'tonal' instrument such as a bell or gong. Being on a zen path, I suspect you may have as well?

Along the lines of sound I also use Ambient music to set an atmosphere. It is what some would call 'new age' but minimalist, the point of it being that it can be played at low volume and simply blend in as background. Particular albums of interest I've found effective...

Frank Perry - Deep Peace/New Atlantis (The instrumentation on these albums consists entirely of 'tonal' instruments such as bells creating wonderful harmonics and no electronics.)

John Foxx - Cathedral Oceans I/II (These albums contain vocalizations and are largely electronic)

Harold Budd - The Pearl (Mostly piano music with some electronic background)

Brian Eno - Ambient 1 (Another of mostly piano, but also some straight electronic pieces)

You can hear samples of any of these albums on Amazon the last I checked.

But something else we may have in common is that any of these techniques are limited in their effectiveness. I personally can't seem to find any particular school or idea that provides me consistent 'results'. So my advice is to experiment. And if one technique proves less effective after time, try another.

I've found a large point for myself to be not to become so concerned with the path I'm following that I forget why I'm on the journey.