LIES!

In the Quad City Leader Volume 19, Issue 20 on May 13, 2004 an article reads:

"Women tell men LIES, Men tell Women LIES" the following is a list which was attatched to the article:

Women:
You're not boring. I love to hear you talk.
I would never want to change you.
I love sports.
I love being around your friends.
I don't mind picking up after you.
I'm secure with you looking at other women.
Yes, you do look like George Clooney.

Men:
We'll talk about it later.
You don't look fat.
I love your new hairdo.
I'd rather spend time with you than go out with my buddies.
I wasn't staring at her. I was looking at her name tag.
You are the only woman I think about.
I love your mother.

HAHAHAHA Those men replies are always what i say personally i there arent lies but comforting statements.

Of course I really enjoyed sex :shk:

* sob sob *

The lies !

Deep

GIRLS:
Oh I caught a huge 12 lb Bass the other day, but broke a nail.

The part about "we'll talk about it later" is so true.

I know we won't talk about it later so I make him to me about then and there.

Men...

Little babies... Sometimes pussies, but you can't live without em.

Originally posted by TrueLies
Men...

Little babies... Sometimes pussies, but you can't live without em.

Hey, not all of us are... most of us are just lazy... in fact about 94.3% of us are, and we're damn proud of it. I don't make up that 94.3% I make up the 0.9% that can do something no one else can really do.

Things men say:
I'm hungry = I'm hungry
I'm sleepy = I'm sleepy
I'm tired = I'm tired
Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd eventaully like to have sex with you
Can I take you to dinner? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
Can I call you sometime? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
May I have this dance? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you
Nice dress = Nice cleavage
You look tense, let me give you a massage = I want to fondle you
Whats wrong? = What meaningless self-inflicted psychological trauma are you going through now?
Whats wrong?(alternate definition) = I guess sex tonight is out of the question
I'm bored = Do you want to have sex?
I love you = Let's have sex right now
I love you too = Okay I said it, we'd better have sex now
Let's talk = I'm trying to impress you by showing you that I am a deep person and maybe then you'd like to have sex with me
Will you marry me? = I want to make it illegel for you to have sex with other guys
I can't find it = I didn't trip over it so im completely clueless
What did I do this time? = Which one of the things did you find out about?
Its a guy thing = I have no idea why I'm doing this, and I don't want to look stupid
Uh huh/Sure honey/Yes Dear = I wasnt paying attention



Things women say:
Yes = No
No = Yes
Maybe = No
It's your decision = The corect decision should obvious by now
Do what you want = You'll pay for this later
We need to talk = I need to bitch
Sure....Go ahead = I don't want you to
I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you stupid moron
How much do you love me? = I did something today your not going to like
I love you = I'm going to love you FOREVER!!!
Is my butt fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful
You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me
Are you listening to me? = Too late, you're dead
I'll be ready in 5 min = I'll be ready in an hour
*Loud sigh* = You are an idiot. Why do I waste my time with you?
*Soft sigh* = I'm happy. Don't do anything to mess it up
This gift is perfect = A perfect piece of crap
I love baseball/football = I like to see guys in great shape in tight uniforms
Fine = This word should end any arguement that I feel I am right about and want to shut you up. Never should be used to describe how another woman looks
Nothing = This means something and you should pay attention.
Go ahead(w/ raised eyebrows) = I dare you. I will probably then get upset over "nothing"
Go ahead(normal eyebrows) = I give up, either that or I really don't care
That's Okay = I want to think long and hard about how I am going to get you back for that one
Thanks = A woman is thanking you. Don't faint just say your welcome
Thanks a lot = not to be confused with "thanks". You have offended me, so expect a *loud sigh*

THE LIES! MORE FROM Page A1!!!

Women:
I'm sorry.
No, I haven't thought about marriage.
Money doesn't matter to me.
I have a boyfriend. ( )
I love your family.
I won't get mad or be hurt by how you think I look.
You are right.
You are the best at everything.
This? It's something I threw on and have had for a long time.
I never talk to my girlfriends about you.
It's just what I've always wanted.
A guy loosing his hair doesn't bother me. Don't worry, you have a high forehead.

Men:
I'm sorry.
No, you don't hog the bed.
I really value our friendship.
I'm a doctor.
I won't tell my friends about us.
I don't enjoy strip joints.
I love movies like "Sleepless in Seattle."
I'm looking to make a commitment.
Trsut me.
I don't have any money.
I'll call you.
I'm not attatched to any of your friends.
I had car trouble.

Ladies
Hun! Me and the girls are gonna go get drunk and watch the ballgame.
All my rowdy friends are comin over tonight.
Oh my god, we just have to have that buck above our fire place!

Guys
Oh my god! I broke a nail!
Hey, hows my ass look?
Lets have wine and talk.