There is such a thing as a happy ending

I been searching on the board to see if this is the right place to post if it is not please can the admin put it in the suitable place.

I would like to give someone a positive inspiration if i could to show that if you believe in yourself you can get peace and tranquillity no matter how much hardship you are in, i would like to give you my personal experiences which has led me to a better place and a better person.

I shall make it as brief as i can but to hopefully give you a good idea of the possibilities you can have in your own life, i would like to give a warning though, there is graphic violence information on this topic that alot of you will not agree to, however i hope you understand this was the old me and not the new me now.

When i was born, i had complications as a child, i had 3 weeks to live, my mother was taken away from me because she was a risk to my health, my father had to fight the local authority to gain custody of me, meanwhile that was happening i was in foster care, at the age of 4 i went back to my dad on conditions he had a social services supervisor present and he took me to a child minder. I had a troubles school background, firstly in nursery were i would not interact with other pupils, i was taking speech therapy as a youngster and was looked after several child minders, Eventually as i went to primary school i was in and out of the school as i felt neglected and not apart of the system and i was bullied were i reacted with violence.

In my secondary school, i lasted just a few months by trying to blow up a school by putting the gas taps on in science and putting paper on fire at the top of the bus as well as fighting and been verbally aggressive to teachers, i then ended up in a special school at the age of 13 and again surly enough i was fighting my way through to be accepted no matter what i did, meanwhile my dad was working his socks of and i dint see him very much, in the special school were i had a special needs statement i unfortunately witnessed two murders, one of which was on the international news please search Janet Swanson murder 1994or 1995 in Leeds England.

I left the special school and had home school teaching by a private tutor which my father paid for, then i went in to another special school a year after of which then i moved home, i dint last long in the school, i then got involved with horrid teenagers who bullied me in my home estate, kicking balls at the window, smashing my dads car, beating me up, chasing me down the road, i became very depressive were at one time i became very mentally disturb with such horrid things as hanging kitten on the light lamps above me and been caressed by a paedophile who bought my dads volkwagan etc. Eventually one night some children who bullied me attacked my dad by hitting him on the back of the head with an iron bar were he was bleeding on the floor, I also started to be aware of the world and about my own self when i was seeking for some kind of intervention and the faith i turned to was god. We then moved to another town, i started college and i was still bullied but i did rebel a bit but i was not as strong willed as i use to be as a younger child.

I kept to myself for a while in this new town, until i wanted to be noticed again and became a rapper which is not what i wanted to do or had a passion for but i tried none the less and this made me get noticed by having several articles in the local newspaper, however it targeted yet more bullies yet again and i was a target, i moved a few times away from my dads home in this new town to hostels were i got involved in gangs, one time I robbed a 14 year old boy with a loaded gun, i knew it was wrong at the time but i had no option anyway and i made sure he was not scared, i then got involved with other rappers who were a bad influence on me then i got involved with drugs and kept smoking cannabis, taking coc aine, i travelled all around the country to meet different girls i talked to over the net, i got in a bit of trouble with some girls family who threatened to burn my house down with my dad in it, i was scared and at the time could not stand up for myself because i had no confidence and i let people take money from me, i was gullible.

One girl i turned violent against and i began to torture her severally, including burning her, battering her, tieing her to a curtain poll, putting a knife to a neck and stabbed her in the arm and leg and i also targeted another boy who i let in my home and i did the same, one urinating in his tea and starving him then battering him, i then started to buy samurai swords and started to become a threat to everyone were i lived, i became known as the local nutter, the people in that area stabbed me, took the mick out of me and my father, one lad who bullied me for 10 years within this new town i came to i stood up against finally and he stopped from there, i broke up with the girl and went further down the rail, until 2 years after i met this one girl.

I met a new girl who i might add i have never abused and never will has helped me understand alot about myself and the world and how to act in it, she guides me in the right direction and has taken me far away from all the negativity i use to be around, i use to ignore my father and say i hated him, i wanted to kill him and even put a knife to him once. This girl, who i virtually now worship has helped me love him again as i did as a child, me and my father get on very well and he says he loves me every night like i do him the same.
I do not go looking for trouble any more, i don't want any more trouble, i have had help from therapist and specialised physicist who have taught me how to cope in the world, helped me how to assert things before doing them and learning how to speak to others without hurting them.

My dad has retired from work, i am due to marry in September the 5th, I have changed in myself, I have a loving family around me which is what i always wished for since i was four years old, i have become more mature, i am not scared of anyone and i am not gullible any more, i am friendly, open minded and not scared of showing love, this girl, i might add i dreamt of for over 14 years in my dreams which came true, she has come from a bad background as well, we understand each other and now that i have gained this tremendous love that i have never experienced before in my life, i am going out more often enjoying myself, travelling, going to activities, bingo,ten pin bowling, sking, going on holiday's aboard and i live in a nice home within a comfortable friendly environment away from those who think they could influence me.

I would like to say to those who do not believe in a good ending, it dose happens, i have been homeless, rejected, nearly killed, slept with fleas crawling all over me, rats in the fall boards, horrible and unhealthy home which was a disaster, had a contract on me, been bullied, been the bully, travelled to areas which were quite dangerous and been with many different individuals and met many different type of people,
i can assure you, there is peace at the end line because if you are truly loving and peaceful being who just wants to be accepted, loved and nutured and regardless if you have done evil deeds which is not you, you will pay them back, but do not fear this because this is short and quick, if you are genenually loving in your heart towards yourself and others in the begining and it is said in your heart to be so, then it will happen in the future, whatever age you end up been.

[edit on 9-4-2009 by deathpoet69] added information

Mod-Note: ALL-CAPS Title changed.


[edit on 9-4-2009 by Skyfloating]

Removed it before I get more points taken away for being a SA.

[edit on 9-4-2009 by justsomeboreddude]

[edit on 9-4-2009 by justsomeboreddude]

We all know that, i am so glad i have a pessimistic attitude to life, and cannot really be bothered with things like positive thinking. The world sucks, we all know that, and humans today are worse than they have ever been.

Glad to hear someone is happy enough in the ending, but do yourself a favour and never bring someone into this world.

[edit on 4/9/2009 by andy1033]

reply to post by andy1033


that could be a good point, i would like a child but i would like to foster children try and give at least one child a good life.

Click here for more information.

[edit on 9-4-2009 by deathpoet69]

Theres always one less evil person in the world.

When you decide to be the better person.

GJ

Be the change you want to see in the world.

Good on you, very good. Most people will not change the way they are and complain about the misery and your story is living proof that even the stupidest maladjusted person can do a 180 and find happiness .

reply to post by Harman


thank you harman, I hope at least i can touch at least one person, i wish i could show this to alot of others in the world i know alot are stuck in the ways and won't budge though, even if my marriage failed in the future, i know that what i had was great and i would always remain friends with the woman as well and i would keep the way i am because i would be happy inside again.

reply to post by Harman


Tell that to someone on death row, that has never commited a crime in there lifes. OH yep they should be positive, shouldn't they.

Ever heard the term, do not judge a person until you walked a mile in there shoes, or something like that.

There are lots of people that have no choice in the fact that there life is destroyed, just because you may want to be positive, you should think about all the evil in the world, that takes over peoples lifes, and they have no way out of it, period.

reply to post by andy1033


everyone has a way out of it, there is some yes that can't and i am not saying there is, but it can be applied if tried, i had to work really hard to get were i am now.

I'm very proud of you for turning your life around! It only takes one decision to change the course of your life. Like you, I had a bad upbringing and had I made a different choice, I'm afraid to think of what my life would have been like. Leave that old life behind and start your new life fresh. Good luck to you.

reply to post by deathpoet69


good for you, but remember some lifes are impossile to fix in society. just being positive means nothing, yep it may help a little inside you, but postive thinking does not work in a new age way people think it does.

reply to post by virraszto

thank you, at least some will be saved at least, i know if i keep up the good work i will die happy i hope knowing what i have achieved, i hope you keep having a peaceful life and not let others put you down, i just wish i could get this out to others that there is a way out, unforuntally like andy said there is some other people who may find it difficult to get out the situation they are in, such as, an African starving to imprisonment to death row however there is some fortune people who have escaped suffering by trying to escape countries such as north korea, some have not, some have got through the net of tyranny,
even though we are all governed by an evil that wishes us to fight against each other and be selfish towards each other dose not mean everyone should surrender to it, we are all fighting against this system, even if those are unaware of what is controlling them for example, criminals are robbing and drug dealing because they want the good life style, a nice home, nice life style, nice material goods etc what everyone expects to have because the way everyone has been brainwashed, so therefore people are murdered for it, people are starving because of greed of others etc, its all for one purpose to have a better life.

Originally posted by andy1033
reply to post by Harman

 

Tell that to someone on death row, that has never commited a crime in there lifes. OH yep they should be positive, shouldn't they.

Ever heard the term, do not judge a person until you walked a mile in there shoes, or something like that.

There are lots of people that have no choice in the fact that there life is destroyed, just because you may want to be positive, you should think about all the evil in the world, that takes over peoples lifes, and they have no way out of it, period.

Yeah there is misery, yeah there will be suffering for a long time, yeah lives will continue to be destroyed by no fault of their own, yeah Africa will continue to be decimated by disease, hunger and war, yeahh the economy will continue to fall and wreak havoc, yeah people will continue be beaten, murdered, robbed and raped, yeah there will be a lot of other bad stuff going around in the world for the forseeable future.

But deathpoet69 has come out of it so that is a good thing, no matter how the rest of the world looks, even when suffering reigns supreme in the mass consciousness of humankind there will be people who find happiness and deserve it everytime they are strong/lucky enough to take that option.

Originally posted by Harman

Originally posted by andy1033
reply to post by Harman

 

Tell that to someone on death row, that has never commited a crime in there lifes. OH yep they should be positive, shouldn't they.

Ever heard the term, do not judge a person until you walked a mile in there shoes, or something like that.

There are lots of people that have no choice in the fact that there life is destroyed, just because you may want to be positive, you should think about all the evil in the world, that takes over peoples lifes, and they have no way out of it, period.

Yeah there is misery, yeah there will be suffering for a long time, yeah lives will continue to be destroyed by no fault of their own, yeah Africa will continue to be decimated by disease, hunger and war, yeahh the economy will continue to fall and wreak havoc, yeah people will continue be beaten, murdered, robbed and raped, yeah there will be a lot of other bad stuff going around in the world for the forseeable future.

But deathpoet69 has come out of it so that is a good thing, no matter how the rest of the world looks, even when suffering reigns supreme in the mass consciousness of humankind there will be people who find happiness and deserve it everytime they are strong/lucky enough to take that option.

exactly harman, its like the luck of the lottery, i could of been dead on many occasions but by shear luck i am here to day and enjoying myself and i am not selfish in anyway of that, that is the difference, i am grateful.

Originally posted by andy1033
We all know that, i am so glad i have a pessimistic attitude to life, and cannot really be bothered with things like positive thinking. The world sucks, we all know that, and humans today are worse than they have ever been.

Glad to hear someone is happy enough in the ending, but do yourself a favour and never bring someone into this world.

[edit on 4/9/2009 by andy1033]

This was very...ehm....EMO if you ask me.
Life is beautiful, if you look at it right

Wake up.

from the deepest worries of the depths of the ghettos and war zones to the escape to the most wonderful countryside of and tranquility can be given to those who trust in self and who battle towards all tyranny, only a few can be chosen there is no reason to why one may be chosen over another for the same deeds but the deeds are paid to everyone