Are You Flippin' Kiddin' Me, Or What?

So like as usual, I can't sleep. It's like 3:00 am and I'm flippin' through the channels. Discovery Channel just went to Paid Programming.

All of a sudden I hear this guy screamin' and stuff. His beard looks like it's been dyed several times. He's always yellin' and stuff. Like it might be some hamburger maker, or a cleanin' chemical, but he's always yellin'.
I guess maybe I should go to my next appointment with a fortune 100 company, and start yellin' at the people sitting around the table.

Yeah! I got it! First, I'll get a black sharpie marker, and draw a full beard on my face then I'll say yell some really fancy cool stuff like:

"So the economy has you down? I am here to stop your frown.
Just like the story of the Phoenix rising, I'm here to show you a deal on your advertising.
Web, radio, TV or print, I'll make you money - get the hint?
When others say it can't be done, we'll scream and yell and make them run.
If others say they should be feared, I'll show they are as fake as my beard.
MR VP you think you're so cool, I'm here to prove that you are a fool.
Quiet closed meetin's might be your style, but look at the orders stuffed in my file.
You think you have sales because you can sell, Mine are better 'cause I scream and yell."

I think I might be onto something here!

(By the way, is he realted to who might be the greatest home run hitter EVER, or does his name just rhyme?)

Dayum!
You're a poet and I didn't know it!

reply to post by lombozo


What channel will you be on? I'll make sure I don't flip it to that channel.

Those people drive me crazy, but yet they make a killin' from it. Some people are actually that naive to respond to him and spend their money. Now we know why the economy is the way it is.

I'll buy 1,000....

What did you just sell me again??

Ahhh good ol Billy Mays. He has woken me up on several occasions when I'm napping with the TV on. OXICLEAN!!! MIGHTY PUTTY!!!! AHHHHHHHH YELL YELL YELL.:bnghd::bnghd::bnghd:

Billy Mays

[edit on 2-2-2009 by Slash]

reply to post by lombozo

Oye vey!, so did you learn anything? I think that should have been about the time you hit yourself in the head with a hammer for some sleep.

I only know to well,, because I sleep for only a few hours at a time.

I always have the t.v. on for noise, even if it is infomercials.

Actually, I think they are funny. Good gosh, are we buying this stuff for people to be able to support the advertising fees?

There is a funny thread somewhere on ATS about snugglies selling 4 million, and how they guy has lost faith in humanity.

Somebody is watching this late night crap, and buying!

Whatever happened to that goofball with the pony tail that sold the crappy exercise equipment? He was the all-time yellin' sellin' feller. Had a high pitched voice like Billy Mays, and virtually SCREAMED. Tony something, maybe. Sold this stuff that looked like flimsy aluminum lawn furniture, but you were supposed to use it to exercise or something.

I always wanted to heart punch the guy.

Originally posted by yeahright
Whatever happened to that goofball with the pony tail that sold the crappy exercise equipment? He was the all-time yellin' sellin' feller. Had a high pitched voice like Billy Mays, and virtually SCREAMED. Tony something, maybe. Sold this stuff that looked like flimsy aluminum lawn furniture, but you were supposed to use it to exercise or something.

I always wanted to heart punch the guy.

Tony Little
www.tonylittle.com...

punching bags make for great exercise..

reply to post by AccessDenied


That's him. Most obnoxious pitchman, ever. Yes, worse than Ron Popeil, and that's saying something.