Sexual Desire

Could the fear of death, the loss of our existence, be the very fuel that lights our sexual desire?

One view is that sexual desire is built from the intensity of stimulation and orgasm. But if death is the loss of ones body, ones existence, doesn't one feel whole or more alive when engaged in sex? The very act which gives life.

Originally posted by socrates271
Could the fear of death, the loss of our existence, be the very fuel that lights our sexual desire?

One view is that sexual desire is built from the intensity of stimulation and orgasm. But if death is the loss of ones body, ones existence, doesn't one feel whole or more alive when engaged in sex? The very act which gives life.

First I think you have to define sexual desire, like snow, there are many different kinds.
Yes, sex gives energy and it is a life force. I truly believe that. But I don't believe the drive or motivation for sex has to do with fear or death. We fear it yes, and we want it badly when we suffer a loss of a loved one. Sometimes a great healer of sadness.
But I don't believe in loss of existence. I believe the drive is to connect again, not feel alone on this earth, to share your soul with someone who loves it. To heal each other in crazy scary world. Orgasm and stimulation drive us to be together, but also are generated just by being together..
yes, I think we feel more alive and more whole, and more natural.
That is why when we use sex as a weapon that it causes so much human damage.

Within all animals, hot and cold blooded is born a need to procreate.

Even plants bear seeds to carry on their species.

Doesn't it make you wonder who created such a system?

You're on the right track. After a brush with death, be it an automobile accident, a tornado, whatever, the adrenalin is heighened and so is the sex drive. In fact, one can become quite addicted to the rush of driving, say 120 miles an hour and then having sex.

Originally posted by dizziedame
Within all animals, hot and cold blooded is born a need to procreate.

Even plants bear seeds to carry on their species.

Doesn't it make you wonder who created such a system?

No, what makes me wonder is why would "someone" create such a system where there is a need to procreate and then place restrictions on that very act. Sounds sick and twisted to me.

To get back on topic, we have sex because it feels good. If sex didn't feel good then we wouldn't do it nearly as much. I don't think it has anything to do with a fear of death.

What I mean is most of us humans fear the unknown and death is a large unknown to many of our society.

Sex however increases one's feeling of completeness, of existence. We seek this out of fear of dieing, of becoming that decaying piece of matter easing out of our existence and reintegrating into the world around us all.

When we see a dead person, they are unresponsive, cold, and sickly. When we see two people making love, it is quite the opposite...(in most cases). Seeing this difference makes us define what is life and so out of fear of dieing people make love to continue their existence.

The notion that we have sex out of fear of dying is alien to me.
And that the drive to create children is our way of dealing with death.
If one feels that way, then the creation of children is a by product of fear.
Which has never crossed my mind.
Children are a natural way to perpetuate the species yes.. and we are driven to do that.
But I do not believe it is a purely biological function.
Having sex as a mechanical way to do that is much different than making love.. Please tell me it is so.
When people have the perspective that it is all about gratification, pleasure, or child birth, it takes away from the possibilities of what it really is. An alchemy of souls. When you leave your soul out of the equation, sex can be dull, and even create more loneliness. I believe that if you do the act, it should be meaningful. It should be an expression of love, not always a taking of energy.
A giving and a taking.. does the plant feel love when it produces a seed by pollination?
What if it did? What if it is a pure form of self love? That the plant needs only that to create life?
Do animals love each other when they have sex? Some mate for life.
I see love from animals all the time.. I don't believe they confuse it with love like we do. I think they just feel it and let it be what it is. They don't over analyze it.

With all this said...if fear makes me want to have hot sex....im gonna go get in a car accident right now than pickup the first prostitute i run into.....

reply to post by kettlebellysmith


I think that is largely because we have had a taste of death so to speak so quickly rush to the ultimate affirmation of life in my opinion, sex.

Originally posted by Watcher-In-The-Shadows
reply to post by kettlebellysmith

 

I think that is largely because we have had a taste of death so to speak so quickly rush to the ultimate affirmation of life in my opinion, sex.

yes, I will agree to that. I think that is a need to be one with someone and not feel so alone. The idea of death makes us fear that we will ultimately be separated by it. That we will be alone again. But I don't believe that. I don't believe that will be the case.
So fearful sex is not necessary in terms of death, and can create a needy feeling. How is another person supposed to ease that fear? Not by sex, but by making love.

Sex is clearly a function.
But of what?

Most obvious answer is: of reproduction.

But then, those who are aware of tantra yoga may say that sex is a vessel to ascension into the realm of spirit.

In this respect, sex is the means of defeating death.

biologyofkundalini.com...

From external source:

The sexual practice mentioned here is not a lewd activity, a craving for enjoyment; it does not aim at pleasure or procreation, but appears as a yoga, a discipline, a sacred act having for its goal the realization of the essence of the Self, the identification with Siva; as such it is essentially ascribable to heroic behavior." ~ Silburn