I'm Being Bullied at Work

I've been abit unsure whether to post this or not. It's a long story, so I'll try and keep it as short as I can.

Basically, I work in a supermarket, with maybe 20 other people. The guitarist and ex-bassist of my band work there, too. Anyway, ever since we kicked the now ex-bassist out of the band, s### has turned sour - especially considering the ex-bassist is a supervisor... as is his DAD, who also happen to be good friends of my boss'.

I'm a duty manager there, which means when ever the supervisors and manager aren't there, which happens quite often, I'm in charge of the store and it's staff. For the last few months, I've really been putting in extra effort at work, I've ALWAYS gone in if somebody is off sick and they are in need of extra staff and do work that isn't mine to do.

Anyway, on Saturday, I came into work at 8am with a seriously killer hangover, I didn't complain about it, I was sick once, but I just got on with my work and worked as hard as I would usually do. The boss wasn't happy with me being hungover, but I told him it wasn't affecting my working ability and carried on.

I didn't talk to the ex-bassist or his Dad because of something that happened the night before while I was out drinking. They knew I was really drunk the night before and how hungover I was.

Anyway, at the end of my shift, he asked me to come into the office for, "a chat". I won't go into detail but the basics of this, "chat" were:

- Apparantly, I'm a waste of space.
- Apparantly, for the last few weeks, everybody has complained about me not working and just standing around.
- Apparantly, the work I do is "half-arsed" and not completed to a high standard.
- I've been put on a, "Performance Monitor System", which will last THREE MONTHS.

In essence, my manager and his two bum-chums (supervisors) are going to make my work-life a living hell until I finally break and leave. The things he said to me are complete and utter lies. I'm not sure if he was having a bad day and needed somebody to release some anger on or what, but I'm so pissed off. I'm even considering court action for unfair treatment, etc.

There are people who I work with who literally do f### all and don't get a bad word said about them, but I come in hungover and I get nearly sacked?!

I think it's quite obvious the ex-bassist and his dad are pissed about what happened about the band and are looking for a pathetic way to get at me. They're always making snide remarks about us kicking him out the band and how "screwed" we will be without him... yeah right.

Anyway, I've decided to keep a journal of every single day I'm at work and if the s### hits the fan, atleast I have something to back me up. Today, I even took photo evidence of jobs not being done to a high standard by other members of staff. For example, one of the things he moaned at me about is that I left some waste (out of date products, poor quality items, etc.) lying in the back over night... It was actually all scanned off, bagged up and waiting to be thrown away.

I came in today to find about 100 loaves of bread out of date from yesterday, a stupid amount of out-of-date sausages lying around... I'm not kidding when I say this, they were actually a grey/black colour when I found 'em. I took some pictures of the mess lying around incase I need to use it as evidence of people's lack of working skills/laziness.

Some may think I'm insane taking pictures of crap, but you have no idea how bad things are at work. I'm looked at like a piece of crap and I'm fed up with it.

I'm currently looking for a new job, but if I get sacked, I am really in financial trouble as I took a pretty big loan out of my bank on Thursday.

Anybody got any advice? Have any of you been in a similar situation?


[edit on 4/8/08 by xeroxed88]

[edit on 4/8/08 by xeroxed88]

It doesnt sound like much fun.

If they continue to harass and bully you, and if you feel like you may lose your job for an unjustified reason, then there is something you may want to consider.


Your boss(es) have a boss as well. I suggest setting up an apointment with whomever that is. If you dont know, find out. Let their boss know whats going on. Mabye even show him the journal and photos.

Their boss may have a good solution to the issue that you have with your ex-bassist.Plus it couldnt hurt to get their boss on your side.

having friends in high places always helps.

Good luck buddy.

[edit on 4-8-2008 by gimme_some_truth]

Its never good when this kind of thing happens,

Your right to keep a log of everything that happens, check out some WEB stuff and see what advice there is on there also,

www.tuc.org.uk...

There are laws now that came in to place for 2007 so might be worht a peek.

I would also suggest talking to your bosses boss if this keeps happening. Let him/her know what happened in the band and that they are harassing you because of it.

I'm not sure where you live but in some areas it is very difficult to come forward at work for any reason. Times have definitely changed.

So many things fall into factor.

1. Is the place managed by experience professionals or people that run things by emotion?

2. Are they always hiring people and proud of it? That means they always fire because they can't manage people worth beans.

3. Are you new to the job? If you are low man in ranking (even if your position is much higher than every other person) than no-one is going to take your side and you'll be considered a trouble starter no matter how much they know you are in the right.

4. Are your ideas really considered or are they just thrown aside with disconderation.

So many things determine how to handle a work problem because everyone pretty much has no clue on how to manage a business and were thrown into the position because they where manipulated into that position with out the proper pay. No one will admit this because they want everyone thinking they are getting paid are experienced and ultimately successful.

This is why most business fail because of the lack of people hiring and management!

Pretty pathetic in my 15 yr management experience opinion!

Thanks guys/girls. I know my boss' boss and get along with him very well. If things do continue, I'll be sure to speak to him next time I see him. The thing about, "Everybody has complained about me" is that if it's a lie, then it's shocking my boss would say that and get everybody involved in this, but if it's true, I feel I can't trust anybody there because they are all liars.

I've been in this job for about two years now, everything has been great until the last few days. The one thing I hate about the job is, no matter how hard you work, nobody appreciates it, as soon as you do one tiny thing wrong, you get a good bollocking for it.

It's almost like they're forcing me leave without actually saying it. Just trying to make me feel as miserable as possible.

Will keep you posted in anything happens.

Documenting the situation is a really smart thing to do X88.

It's pretty obvious that some folks are unable to separate workplace stuff, from non workplace stuff.

You might throw out a "virtual carrot"..
A bit of information saying that there are discussions about bringing him back into the band. You don't have to follow up on it, but you may get some good behavior out of these arse-clowns for a while.

reply to post by spacedoubt


Today, the ex-bassist was being really nice to me, which was odd. I think maybe him and his Dad told my boss some lies about me to get me into trouble, but never realised it would nearly get me sacked, so he's probably sucking up to me. I think he realised how bad I was feeling when he asked, "Are you okay today, man?" and I just said, "No" in a pretty angry way and the fact I avoided him for a while, which he was fully aware I was doing. He even offered to drive me home after work.

Maybe I'm just being paranoid and my boss generally dislikes me and this has nothing to do with the band thing.

As for mentioning we might bring him back to the band, there is no way after the way he treated us. I know it's only a way of getting him off my back but it may cause more problems. One of the main reasons we kicked him out was because we were playing pretty high-up on the bill at a festival, we weren't told we were getting paid at all, but he was told apparantly weeks before the actual event and decided to keep the money for himself. That is until we found out about it and confronted him, which he openly admitted doing!

We recieved the payment when we arrived at the festival by the organisers, but the now ex-bassist wasn't there when that happened. It was addressed to him and we were all really confused and decided that we would hold on to it until after we played the show (which was an awesome one, might I add) and let him tell us about it... which he didn't. So, after the show, we opened the envelope infront of the ex-bassist and it turned out it was a hell of a lot of money, we gave him the envelope and asked, "Why the # didn't you tell us about this?" after a quick conversation, we gave him the money and told him we thought it was best for him to leave the band, which he agreed to.

Anyway, our new bassist is awesome in comparison, so it's a win-win situation.

Apparantly, this "performance monitor" thing really does suck. I'll basically be treated like a kid for three months and have targets set out for me to achieve. The one thing I hate the most is being patronised and I'll probably end up saying something I'll regret.

I'm actually pretty surprised I still have my job after I told my boss I think he and the situation is a, and I quote, "F###ing joke" during our "chat".

Anyway, too much babbling on for one post.

[edit on 4/8/08 by xeroxed88]

If things get really bad you could always just take a poop somewhere randomly in the store and then call the health inspector. Get your boss a nice fine and you can laugh for years to come.

Though I'm sympathetic, I can see some lessons in this story for you.

Instead of being antagonistic, let your boss know by way of your actions that you are being more responsible.

Take your lumps wrt things that you do wrong, even if you don't see them that way. (Who does? We all try to mitigate our conduct)

Maybe this is a sign that you should look at your behavior after hours and clean up your act, stop getting so drunk that you show up at work 'hung over'?

Taking video of other people's mistakes is supposed to help -your- case, how? It just shows absence of being a team player.

If you get caught doing this, I could imagine your boss terminating you.

If you go over your bosses' head, I can see big problems.

There are advantages to playing straight here, cleaning up your act, getting a good attitude, not looking at others' faults as an excuse for any of your own faults.

Consider, no matter how hard it is to take that maybe the boss that put you on review had a real reason, and play it accordingly. At the end apologize to him for whatever you might have done wrong, while not admitting to more than you are responsible for and work even harder. Don't worry about what others do so much.

Again, I sympathize, and hope those months go by quickly and they see your value and keep you and by working hard your reputation goes up.

Good luck!

reply to post by Badge01


I do see where you are coming from and agree that I shouldn't have gone out and got drunk on a night before work. However, considering I didn't let my hangover bother me and just got on with my job, I don't see why my boss was angry with me.

The point is, I'm being picked on by my boss and supervisors and have been for ages, just recently it's become really serious. I'm not going to inform them of people's names when/if I show the pictures, I haven't taken pictures of any staff members, and I 100% believe the mess I took pictures of was left by one of the supervisors! They're just there incase I need them and to prove to him and the company that nobody else gets told off for things they do wrong, only me. I'm not trying to get sympathy, I'm not trying to get attention, I'm just trying to prove a point. I don't know what to do other than what I'm doing right now, and at the moment that way seems the only way to show what I mean. He doesn't believe a word I say to him when I try to argue my case.

Even when I've tried talking to him in the past, he just looks at me like something he walked in and doesn't even bother responding. A few times, I've walked in on conversations between my boss and the supervisors talking about me in a horrible way. The last time that happened, I told them if they want to say something about me, they were to say it to my face; which is fair play in my book. I expect to be treated like I treat others and that is with respect and it's obvious I'm not getting any respect.

Anyway, I have a day off today. So I'm going to enjoy it and not think about work until tomorrow.

I agree that you shouldn't try to bring other people down with all of this, although I know it is tempting especially when you know that nearly everyone else is lazier than you yet you get the blame for it. But I do think writing down everything that happens to you personally at work is a good idea.

However I tend to think this performance monitoring could work out in your favor. If nothing comes out bad in this, it could make your supervisors look like idiots.

reply to post by snowflake_obsidian


Yeah, that's a good point. I might just try and pass it with flying colours and make them look like fools.

Thanks.

reply to post by xeroxed88


i can see your from yorkshire, I am from Leeds orignally. There like that round here, i would look for another job while been in that one and then just leave. Theres no point in it, other hand , save some money and have them killed.

Quite a strange turn of events...

I was called early Friday morning by my boss, practically begging me to come to work early because one of the supervisors and two staff members called in sick. I agreed and also was asked to work an extra five hours on Saturday. Ever since then my boss hasn't said anything bad about/to me. Just have to wait until the supervisor returns to work to see what's going to happen.

I have a week long holiday this week so I won't know anything until Tuesday! Going to a festival on Thursday (Bloodstock Open Air) until Monday, can't wait!

reply to post by xeroxed88

i agree with badge01, about not giving them anything to be nasty about, i would also go and talk to CAB, they are very good at letting people know thire rights and will point in in the right direction should u ever need to take this further. i would also start looking around for another job, just incase (or even sign up with an agency, as back up plan, incase you loose this job).
best of luck and dont let the bu**ers grind you down,
m x