The Insane Awards

How insane are you? What is the most insane, nutty or just not thinking thing you have ever done?

I thought of this when I was driving home today because I was talking out loud to myself, stopped and then became startled when I realized that someone in the car had just spoken to me! I have a really bad memory.

Once at the laundry mat, I went up to the register and asked for $5 regular (gas) when I meant $5 in quarters.

A few times ive put the kettle in the fridge and then thought about it im like wtf

I agree Jonna - you should up your medication or institutionalize yourself immediately!

One time, I went to a gass station, pumped some gas then went inside to pay for it and get a snack. Then I drove about 2 blocks down the street to another gas station and got gas again. I went in to pay for it and realised that I had just got gas. Then, I realised that I hadn't paid for my gas at the first gas station, only my munchies. So, I drove back to the first gas station to pay for my gas. When I got there, the clerk was on the phone with the cops about my gas run. I paid him and he told the cops nevermind.

when i was younger i was on some swings and i thought maybe if i got going fast enough and high enough i could fly when i jumped. EDIT: i forgot to mention the part where i let go, went spread-eagle, and ended up bellyflopping onto the sand and blacking out.

... i was 13 years old :shk:

[Edited on 3/5/2004 by cmdrkeenkid]

My sharring of my adventure got me a warn, so I will talk about another insane thing i've done

I remember it was a around 9 am during the summer one day, and I climbed the cynderblock fence, it was about 10 ft tall, anyways I just did a super jump off it, but the grass was wet so I screwed my landing and hit myself in the chin with my knee...

Man it felt like a tyson punch, I just laid out in the grass for about 5 mins before I realise my chin was gushing blood.

when i was younger i was on some swings and i thought maybe if i got going fast enough and high enough i could fly when i jumped. EDIT: i forgot to mention the part where i let go, went spread-eagle, and ended up bellyflopping onto the sand and blacking out.

Don't feel bad, I did the same thing, and ended up breaking my arm, as I landed (or at least the arm did) on a concrete sidewalk...

Not 60 days of out of prison, I turned to robbing Drug dealers.

Hey, that should be my award.

I've done many stupid and insane things, and I will continu to do so until I kill my self or die naturaly.

I've been dragged on a skateboard with a rope attached to a car, on a snowboard behind a ski doo on a frozen river, that was almost only ice, really few snow.
Also been dragged on a really little plastic sled, at crazy speed behind a four-wheels. On the same icy river.
Lemme tell you that when you fall off and your body keep rolling on the ice for a few mins... It hurts, but damn it's funny.

I've jumped from house roof into swimming pools, I've snowboarded while being totally drunk, climbed various three, jumped from various high locations (always loved the impression of flying), climbed on building roofs without equipement (most of the time without being sober), mixed various substances that are not supposed to be mixed. Took part in a few riots.

I drove with insane ammount of alcohol (and sometime others substances) in my blood (that I'm really not proud of it tho). Fell asleep behind the wheel once.

That's all I can think of rigth now.

Originally posted by m0rbid
I've been dragged on a skateboard with a rope attached to a car.

I did the same thing, but it was with rollerblades and I don't know how to skate! I must have been on something.

Back in college I had this stick on a dog leash that I would drag around campus to confuse people. Now you can see how warped my sense of humor really is!

I went on this kick for a while where I would only wear pajamas in public. I think that I did it to embarass my mother. I also use to wear suits out with a costume tyger's tail hanging out the back. I must really get some kick off confusing people.

Originally posted by Jonna
Back in college I had this stick on a dog leash that I would drag around campus to confuse people. Now you can see how warped my sense of humor really is!

I like that kind of humor. I always enjoyed confusing people too.

There was this time where me and my cousin were having fun just randomly making strange noise, like you soemtime hear retarded people do.

People look at you strangely.

Originally posted by Jonna
Now you can see how warped my sense of humor really is!

i love your sense of humor!

Originally posted by Gazrok
Don't feel bad, I did the same thing, and ended up breaking my arm, as I landed (or at least the arm did) on a concrete sidewalk...

yeah, i was at the beach, so i landed on packed sand and grass/weeds.

ANOTHER ONE:
when jackass was all the rage my friends at the time and i did our own stuff. i ended up being the scooter crash king. i could make it look so real and hilarious, without getting hurt. sadly though, those days came too an end when i ended up giving myself a concussion from banging my head on a parking block (it was actually accidental too). the video does look kickass in slo-mo though!

I did lots of jack ass stuff too.

One day I was riding a little motorcycle on my yard, on wet grass, and I hitted the brake, but I don't knwo why, I grabbed the front wheel brake, so the bike slidded, I ended up sliding in the grass, facing the ground. It was funny afterward.

Also, at one time we had up to 3 little motorcycle (one 50 cc and two 70 cc). One of the 70 cc didn't had brakes, and we did a little race, since I was the more experimented, I took the one without brake. Luckily I didn't crashed my self, and everyone always moved out of my way, knowing I couldn't really stop, only slow down by down-shifting.

Lately my girl called me insane, cuz I cutted my thumb badly, so I had to have it sewed back together, but when it was time to remove the "suture wire", I didn't wanted to have to go wait at the clinic for hours again, so I removed them my self. It kind of hurted, thumbs and finger are #ing sensitive... Hopefully I had only 3 to remove...

[Edited on 5-3-2004 by m0rbid]

More in the 'just not thinking' catagory, but....

When I was much, much younger, I was haulling fire wood around the yard using a small tractor. I went over a small incline and for some reason the tractor started to tip to the left side. Well, I put my foot on the ground so it would not tip, but the wheel ran over my foot, yanked me off the tractor and drove over my leg as the tractor just kept driving across the yard. I was more in shock then hurt.

And speaking of yard work incidence......I was outside with my step father one day; he was chainsawing trees as I was dragging them away. All of a sudden I hear him scream "RUN!!!". So I did....right into the falling tree. Luckily I was only hit by one of the branches, but next time I told him to give me a direction in which to run!

It's ok to laugh about it...I do!


I am so danger prone that I have:

Actually slashed my throat with an electric razor.

Scewered my hand while attempting to cut a bagle with one of those super sharp knives.

Nearly severed my thumb while attempting to cock a rifle. I didn't pull it back all the way and when I let go the thing slammed my thumb. I was about 9 at the time...and NO my mother is not Sara Conner!

I don't know about me!

When I was really young, a friend of mine told me that glass is stronger than metal. I didn't believe him. SO he told me, yeah it's right, just try to scratch a piece of glass with some metal.

So I took an old glass lense, putted it on my left leg, grabbed a knife and proceeded to try to scratch the glasse.

No need to tell you that the glasse was not scratched, and I ended up with knife stuck in my leg lol..

One time, just while having fun jumping in a pool, I succeeded at moving 2 vertebral discs in my back. I couldn't turn my neck for a few weeks, even after the docs replaced them.

One time, when I was stone, I closed the refregirator door...on my head. Don't know how that happen, I only know that I almost fell on the floor laughing right after it, and my father was right next to the kitchen, he looked at me strangely.

Edit: There's this one time too, where I took a 110 volts shock while trying to move a electrical wall-outlet while doing some renovation. It was weird, at first I didn't even noticed I was being electrocuted. Then my hand started feeling weird. Then I couldn't let go and had to use all my will-power to pull back.

It was funny.

[Edited on 5-3-2004 by m0rbid]

And it the 'There is something just not right with you' catagory....

I once drove past a yard that had one of those plaster donkeys pulling a little cart. Well, something was really off that day and when I saw it I thought that some prankster had positioned them so it looked like the cart was F***ing the @ss in the @ss. I went hysterical for days and even now I chuckle when I think about it.

I once forgot how to get home even though I was on the road that led there.

In the 'There is something just not right with you' catagory....

Whenever I see a garden dwarf, I have a sudden urge to kick the hell out of it.

There was this time where me and my cousin were having fun just randomly making strange noise, like you soemtime hear retarded people do.

I do that all the time, most of the time in public, I enjoy acting like I am retarded every now and then.

Btw, I need the rant forum today, I am so #ing full of anger right now. ARGH!!

not looking forward to going back to work after lunch, going to have to throw axes at a tree or something at work so I don't flip out and go berzerk.

[Edited on 5-3-2004 by Lysergic]

***If you are easily offendable, DO NOT read this!***
*It was just a thought from my subconscious and I had no control over it*


I had the strangest dream last night. I was invited to the friend of a friend's house where there was a party going on with one male that I knew, a second male (the house owner), and 4 women. From the moment that I entered the house I felt uneasy. Everyone was drinking, smoking and doing drugs; this is not the sort of thing that normally bothers me. I was mostly in the cornor observing the whole time. Anyway everyone was acting really 'evil' for the lack of a better word. I just can't describe it.

Finally, my friend and I left and began to drive home. A few miles down the we saw a carved up bus and a bunch of half nude people in 'Mad Max' clothing. It was the people from the party. The started chasing us and eventually we had to battle. I was kicking @ss all ninja style and then suddenly my friend turned around and he had the same 'evil' look in his eyes that the others had. I ended up slaughtering all of them except one girl. It took forever as I had to dismember them all.

When I came to the last girl she just stopped and told me to listen to what she had to say. She said that she was Satan and was jumping from body to body (possession) in order to release everyones desires. She then told me that for some reason she could not posses me because I was too strong willed, that she was impressed that I was able to kill all of her demons without a scratch and that if I became her body guard, I could have anything in the world that I wanted.

So just as I am about to kill her in my current state of blood lust, I throw her down and start...........a bunch of other girls came out and we all........... You get the idea!


What the hell!!! I can't say that I have ever had dreams like this before; I mean, I was making female satan scream in a good way. Funny thing is that Satan was Elizabeth Hurley (I did just see the movie Bedazzled last week).


Sooooo....Do I get the Insane award yet???

Originally posted by Lysergic

I do that all the time, most of the time in public, I enjoy acting like I am retarded every now and then.

Yeah! I know what you mean, it's damn funny! We haven't did this in a while, but man how much fun we had looking like retards... lol...

And goddammit, I miss the rant forum too...

Jonna

I think dreams rarely makes sense. i had loads of dream wich, to me, looked totally insane. I posted some of 'em in the dream forum. Now that I re-started to smoke weed, I've stopped being able to remember my dream in the morning...

But yours sure was one crazy ass dream...

[Edited on 5-3-2004 by m0rbid]