posted on Apr, 16 2008 @ 12:40 AM
When I try to wrap my mind around the concept of a conscious creator god that existed for an infinite number of years, before "he" decided to create
both an amazingly vast physical universe, along with non-physical dimensions, it's very hard to say I know it is true.
I question why "he" would chose to depart from the perfection that his existence expressed, and I also question why he would choose a reality that
involves the possibilty of war, murder, hunger, disease, ageing, disease, and death. Being god, he had to know what would happen.
I mean, god was creating a physical reality from scratch. Why not eliminate the really ugly aspects of physical existence such as war and rape. If
he is pure love, why subject his creation to such violent extremes? (And don't ask me the question of why a loving god could possibly create a
system where some of his creations might end up in a very unpleasant hellish environment for all eternity. You know who I'm talking about. The
children of crack addicts, etc. ...)
It's also very hard to accept the idea that a conscious, non-physical creator god could be aware of every leaf on every tree, every pimple on every
human.
So when my logical, rational brain does this analysis, the result is that I end up with a rejection of the god idea.
But when I think very hard about how the physical universe first began, I begin to have doubts. The big bang theory, which isn't a slam dunk when
you look at some recent scientific evidence, involves the idea that the very first preatomic, physical stuff, electrons and ions, spontaneously
erupted from a vacuum that wasn't confined to any location.
When the vacuum is everywhere, even when there is no where, I have a lot of trouble believing that electrons and ions, or anything else, could spring
forth from this nothingness.
And that's when I wonder whether a creator god or force might have played a role.
Sometimes I think a creator god exists, and sometimes I don't.
w