How aliens prepare their missions

Read to the end for the entire/satire?

Zorg wakes up in his room on the mother ship. He goes and assembles his unit of Greys.
All 5 of them have their Zerillian coffee and they report to overlord unit commander Machtar the reptilian.

He informs them of their mission, they must go to earth and complete the checklist for alien visitation.

The unit then goes to the launch bay. They have a selection of several beautiful alien craft, however they settle on the one that looks like a hubcap.

They then launch from the mother ship hiding in Jupiter's rings and proceed to earth.

First on the check list is to fly past the moon several times in an attempt to fool any amateur astronomers with digital cams.

Next on the list is to let their silver alien streamers fly loose in the upper atmosphere creating snake like reflections.

On the way down they are asked to test all the ships external lighting over Phoenix before proceeding with more detailed mission steps. There may be several other ships also testing lights so be aware of traffic.

Then to proceed and make human contact. But not with governments or worldwide media, the list clearly states one of the following:
- An amateur PC fix it guy
- A new age guru
- A CGI expert
- A Film director
- A freaky lady

Zorg settles on the PC guy...

They cloak their ship and turn on silent mode so noone anywhere can verify it came so close to the ground in a large city.

Then they follow the lists orders and remove all clothing and hide their genitals.

They then proceed to make sure that they have no weapons, shields or any other electronic devices - as the list requests - and proceed on foot at least 1 to 2 km.

On the way they indeed satisfy the list requirement of hiding behind a telegraph pole and scaring teenagers before proceeding to the contactee's house.

Once inside they make sure he remains in an semi conscious state, all of course while naked and having no devices.
They then escort the man unseen to their ship.

All manner of probing is done, even though the rear orifice is in no way useful to anyone.

The man is returned without memory of the event home, but the memory lock is set for exactly 2-3 weeks or 15 years...its generally randomly accurate.

Then they are to make sure they are seen by police and airforce radar on their way out.

The last task is to use their "low megapixel camera detector" and bad lighting sensors to find people to make shots of them before returning to the mother ship.

Zorg report another successful mission to the overlord, who is pleased....

/satire off
...and the whole point would be? Exactly there is no point to such stories.
That's why I only look for facts...

I had to laugh at that

great post...Just waiting for the bob newhart sketch of it

Thx, made me chuckle whilst writing...

You aren't just a good writer, you have a pretty vivid imagination as well. I like the story you wrote. Thanks for making me laugh.

reply to post by smans


Well, it's as probable as any theory!

Have a star!