Bein' a Cannibal And Stuff

So I was sittin' here doin' some thinkin'..... I listenin' to a program on my fancy radio. Like it has these tubes in the back that get all glowy and stuff. And like it has a really cool clock on the front. I like to watch that second hand of that really cool clock move around the face. Yep. If I was a clock I would want to be that second hand. The hour and minute hand are so slow and stuff, but that second hand moves around that really cool clock with blazing speed! Yep that is one fancy radio. Yeah!

So like this program was talkin' about these people who got into a plane crash, and had to eat each other to stay alive. And like they killed one person so they could eat him and stuff.

So I says to myself, Self? What would you do if you were in that plane crash? Hmmmmmmmm...............

I'd probably get pretty hungry and stuff....... But would I kill someone? Hmmmmm......... I guess that depends if my loser brother in law was in that plane crash. I'd like serve him up with some hors douvres, and a nice bottle of wine and stuff.

Hmmmmmm.......... I guess I couldn't kill anybody. I'd be like real nice and ask the other people if I could just take a couple of bites and stuff. That way everyone can still be livin' and stuff! Yeah! Now that's some good thinkin'!

Hmmmmm............ I wonder if it would taste like chicken?

Unless your plane crashed in Anarctica, there's always something else to eat besides your fellow crash survivors. Just need to be able to identify them. While mowing my back yard the other day, I counted about 12 different wild edibles. I wasn't hungry enough to pick them and was in a hurry to get in out of the hot sun but it was comforting to know they were there (now mowed down). Still, I think I'd risk popping an unidentified plant into my mouth before I'd resort to cannibalism.

Nah, not chicken. Indonesian cannibals used to call people "long pig." So be sure to take lots of pork bbq sauce on every plane ride!

You are what you eat. Literally in this case.

reply to post by MajorMalfunction


You can pack more in your carry-on luggage if you go with the barbeque shake-n-bake rather than the sauce.