Tastes Like Chicken

So I'm sittin' here doin' some thinkin'...............I was listenin' to some cook guy talkin' about different foods. That cook guy thought he was so cool. Wearin' a white jacket with lots of fancy buttons on it, and wearin' a really fancy tall white hat and stuff. And like he had this really big fancy knife that he'd be slicin' stuff with. He was makin' frog legs. He kept sayin' that it tastes like chicken. Stupid cook guy - I don't trust that cook guy.
So I says to myself, Self? If those frogs legs taste like chicken, then why not just eat chicken? Why make all those poor frogs have to use little frog wheelchairs and stuff?
Hmmmmmmmmmm............. It's a great big French conspiracy! Yeah! You never hear a single word about all those poor frogs glidin' around on their little froggy wheelchairs and stuff. Hmmmmm........ I gotta do some investigatin' and stuff on that............
So like this stupid cook guy also made some alligator chili. One of the people on the show said - "It tastes like chicken."

What is this? Like does everything taste like chicken? When you eat a piece of tasty chicken should I say "Hey, this tastes just like Frogs Legs!"

Are all animals related to the chicken? Hmmmm......... I heard somewhere that T-Rex is related to the chicken.............Hmmmmmmmmmmm. I bet that T-Rex tasted like chicken. Man! That would be so cool! Like invite 1,000 people over for Thanksgivin' and stuff. Then pull that T-Rex out of the oven all filled with stuffin' and stuff! Yeah! I bet those 1,000 people would be so surprised!
Wait! That would be one heck of a drumstick! Yeah!

Oh Brain - this is such good thinkin'!

Like we could clone those T-Rex and end world hunger! Yep, send a bunch of those T-Rex over to like those really poor nations. They'd be eatin' tasty T-Rex in no time. I bet those countries would send really cool thank you letters and stuff.

Dear Mr. Lombozo,
On behalf of our village I would
like to thank you for the tasty
T-Rex. We cooked it in the village
square. Everyone ate and ate.
It tasted just like chicken!

Warmest Regards,
Oloika Hushu

Yeah!, We gotta start clonin' those T-Rex and stuff! I wonder if I'll win the Nobel Prize for this really cool thinkin'?

Hmmmm .... I sense a conundrum here.

Does everything taste like chicken? Or does chicken taste like everything else?

Which came first, the chicken or the taste?

Chickens are the closest living relatives of the dinosaurs, so the T-Rex could very well taste like chicken. Sorry, I mean the chicken tastes like T-Rex.

Alligator and croc don't taste like chicken, though. They taste like fish. I know, I've had some.

Oh now you've gone and made me hungry, it's just gone midnight and - hold the phone - Maccy D's is always open!

I'll have a McT-rex sandwich and a fillet of crocodile.

Hmmm Now that's some good pretend eattin'