Band Relationships: Just bad News?

Hey everyone.

Just pouring my heart out here.


Okay.


I've just joined a band with a couple of firends. I've known the rhythm guitarist and the other lead guitarist (I play lead as well) for quite a while.

However, I've just met our bassist and our drummer. Our drummer is simply amazing. She's been doing it for years, and she's got a great skill, and she's pretty good looking, too . I like her, and I considered asking her out, but I realized that being in a band relationship always ends in badness, because of the tension that occurs in band meetings and performances. Plus, I found out that our rhythm guitarist/vocalist is going out with our drummer anyway, which made me pretty upset.

I really wanted to say something to him or to our drummer, but I really don't know what to say. I'm afraid that if I don't say anything, it could be bad for our band. I think that, if they were to break up, we could not only lose our drummer, but our bassist as well, because they are sisters. I'm aslo worried that if I say something, he'll take it the wrong way and think that i am trying to get them to break up so that I can ask her out and "steal" her from him, because he was the first person I told that I liked her and he told me that they were already going out.

I really don't have bad feelings toward him or her. I consider them like family. They are like brothers and sisters to me, and I'd never be able to hold a grudge against any of them. I've told him that I've gotten over being depressed and upset about the fact that they're going out, and that there is no animocity towards them. I would honestly wish them the best of times when they're together, because I know they'll break up sooner or later, like most teenage relationships.


How do I try to tell him my point? I want to tell him that I think going out with someone in the band is a bad idea, but I feel that if I approach him with this, he'll think I'm trying to break them up!

I really don't want this band to end. We've already started jamming, and we came up with one of the tastiest rhythms I've heard in a while (and I came up with a good solo, too, and I don't want this to jeopardize the band.


What do I do?

TheRanchMan





[edit on 4/3/2007 by TheRanchMan]


[edit on 4/3/2007 by TheRanchMan]

Bone the bassist.


Thats all I could come up with.

I wouldn't.

First of all, we're all high school students, and she's the only freshman in the band. Secondly, she's definitely not my type. She's been caught up in the Japanese culture craze that's sweeping Florida (damn, do I hate Florida), and I just don't think she's my type.


And that wouldn't resolve what I want to say to our vocalist, either.


Funny, though. Your post did cheer me up.


TheRanchMan

Also, our drummer tends to act strangely around me. i don't know why.


Maybe he told her and it totally freaked her out.



Uh oh.



TheRanchMan

well, I've gotten over this, but now I feel a little bit differently.

Our drummer pays attention to me, and she's cool with me.

But seeing those two just walking around (not even holding eachother or holding hands, or kissing or anything) just makes me angry. Kind of like a "Why not me!?" kind of feeling.

Anyone know how I feel? How can I get over this?

TheRanchMan

I don't really feel like typing some huge dissertation, but I have an update on the situation.

The drummer asked me out.


Long story short, we made out in her kitchen.


TheRanchMan