Getting the Last Word

IMHO, this thread should be closed...this ATS thread has already been infected by the BTS thread Last to Post Wins!...


[edit on 14-10-2006 by MidnightDStroyer]

The need to get the last word is an interesting phenomena.

One thing that we all need to remember is that every single one of us sees things through our own biases. Personally, I feel people need to stop dragging their grudges around from thread to thread. Reading more into someones post than what they actually said is not very helpful, to say the least. Perhaps giving people the benefit of the doubt, or asking for clarification might be in order instead of making assumptions about their motives.

Where one person sees a troll, another person may see posters jumping to conclusions about intent and dragging around baggage.

Originally posted by Duzey
Reading more into someones post than what they actually said is not very helpful, to say the least. Perhaps giving people the benefit of the doubt, or asking for clarification might be in order instead of making assumptions about their motives.

Never assume people, take a moment before ripping the member a new... pair of shoes?... and ask what their true intentions were. Swallow some pride, and announce that your alittle unsure about a specific point in their post and you would appreciate if they could clarify it.

I do one of two things:

Just what was said. Before posting any thoughts, I'll ask the member to clarify on something that is a gray area.

or

I will post my thoughts, with extreme caution and respect for the poster because I know full well I could be completely off with this. I also throw a note on the bottom to the author that if I had taken this the wrong way, ignore it and move on. Don't take offense to it.

This is no sign of weakness, this is a sign of respect for fellow members. I always give the benefit of the doubt, even if the member had crossed me before.

I created a thread last week, and made a slip up in the opening sentence. A member jumped in with alittle more expertise on weaponry and called me out on it. Rather than politely pointing this out, the post was filled with a series of 's. I found it very offensive and ignorant. I could of responded harshly, but I simply explained my distaste for the manner in which he called me out.

He responded with he was denying ignorance. Now we need to be clear that you can not ignorantly deny ignorance. When I politely explained this point, he responded with a complete apology and understood his error.

If that poster does read this, my hats off to you because I have a tremendous respect for your.

This did surprise me though, because I really thought this would be a case where the member would continue to assault my posts and want to get the last word in. But my refusal to get into this bickering match, and continue to be polite may of ended this before it began.

Hell, I even got an apology.

www.abovetopsecret.com...



Springer...

I think it has to do with maturity. Actually being on ATS will mature you to some extent I think. I remember when I first came on ATS one poster told me straight up he was about to flame me! I didn't take it that well (a little personal).

I've come a long way since then, skin's a bit thicker. But I've noticed that most folk that have been on ATS for a while 'settle' in and find tactful ways of disagreement. The ones who won't offer us a chance to sharpen our social skills. (If they last) Even if that means silence from time to time.

Originally posted by watch_the_rocks
Admittedly, I was recently involved in a "Getting the Last Word" competition, but this was one of the good ones. See here. If a mod stepped in and saw what me and StellarX were getting at, there is a chnace they could have just closed the thread, expecting that we'd eventually just end up making abusive passes at each other. No one did, and that's good.

I have not forgotten you and when i find some time to complete some issues i am researching 'i will be back' and about as deadly as Arnie. Abuse is what happens when the party dishing it out has nothing of value to contribute to the discussion and it's normally a good way of picking out which side is to be believed when one is not going to explore the issue in any depth yourself.

Stellar

I'm waitin' Stellar, I'm waitin'!

You two pipe down!



A great example of when getting the last word can be beneficial to those involved and the site itself.