Should I just be the middleman instead?

Hey folks. It's been a while since I posted in this forum... and I got a question/problem...

There's this girl I've really liked for a while (known her for a little over a year). We've been talking a whole lot and everything seems to have been going just fine. Recently however, she's started talking with another dude more frequently and they would sometimes have lunch together. I didn't mind at all.

Now for the juicy part... the guy recently started talking to me wanting to know about her. So I told him a bit of what I knew. Me and her have still been talking and today, she asked me (since she knows me & him speak) if he's ever asked or spoken about her.

Right then in my mind I was a combo of , :bnghd: and .

In front of her, he blantantly flirts, and says the kinds of things I'd be too much of a puss to say.

Since I'm friends with the two of them, should I just carry on the middleman job? Is it wrong to put my own feelings aside and help her with him for the sake of making her happy? (like I want to do) ...or should I spill my guts and risk making things awkward?

I don't want to be a douchebag... but I don't want to be a doormat either. I guess it's also safe to say I'm in the friend zone since I'm literally the only person shes confided this to? (the fact she likes him)

Sounds like a difficult situation to be in.

If it were me, and I cared about the girl alot, I would want her to be happy. If she has asked you about him then that means that she's interested in him quite a bit and maybe doesn't see you in the same light.

Again, if it were me, I wouldn't say anything to her about how you feel because she is interested in the other guy.

Think of it this way:

Scenario 1) You tell her how you feel, which then makes her feel awkward and will find it difficult to approach you.

Scenario 2) You don't tell her, and continue being friends with her.

Finally, I would try and spend as much time with her as possible so that she isn't always with the other guy.

Good luck with it and I hope I helped.

Originally posted by prophetmike
I guess it's also safe to say I'm in the friend zone since I'm literally the only person shes confided this to? (the fact she likes him)

I hate to say it, but you hit that nail right on the head.
[[[[The Friend Zone]]]] zone zone

And generaly speaking, at least for me, if a guy don't do something right off the bat, before 'the friend zone' happens - it's just too late.

oh yeah buddy your in the friends zone and well that sucks, but under no means should you help either of them figure out what to do with each other so let him figure it out what you need to do is stop doing what you are doing and treat her like one of the guys now. rember the friends zone works both ways. and absolutly the last thing you want to do is spend anymore time with her than usual youll just drive her right to him cause now your being all clingy and needy. Step up be a man so start doing the things he does with someone else.

[edit on 24-11-2006 by Jovi1]