Whats the funniest conspiracy theory you've heard?

That ATS is full of government agents.

We are so above the government...

[edit on 5/10/2006 by eaglewingz]

Personally, I think that aliens are not abducting people for experimentation purposes.

It’s for intergalactic porn. They maybe give them roofies or knock em out, and then some strange alien has his/her/its way with them. And it’s all filmed, for distribution on some alien internet somewhere

Then they get dumped back home all sore and used up.

Makes sense to me. Sick, twisted sense, but sense.

They are building an intergalactic army. They probe a few orifices with special machines, get a human hybrid, then put him in a giant cyogenic storage space. Then when Nibiru reaches Earth they unfreeze them all

I'd still have to say that the silliest conspiracy of them all is 19 Arab highjackers highjacked 4 planes and flew them in US airspace off course for almost an hour with very slow intercept times from the most advanced military on the planet. Lead by Osama Bin Ladin, simply because he hates our freedoms.

www.prisonplanet.com...

I know,,,I know,,,


Alex Jones is a conspiracy whacko, yadda yadda

I love Alex Jones. His research is first rate and if somebody can prove 9/11 was an inside job, it's him. Yet he also has some ridiculous ideas backed with shoddy research as well:

-Mexicans taking over America paranoia

-Arnold as possible dictator

-Anything on Masonry

who can deny he's a genius though? Bohemian Grove, all his ideas and research on 9/11.... he's a smart guy, and not crazy like Icke.

The funniest conspiracy to me is the theory of the Democrat and Republican party and that our vote means anything.

that gwb is smart enough to pull off half of the stuff he's accused of.

that there is an alien aircraft/technology inside ayers rock/uluru.

anything that eidelweiss pirate posts (just kidding dude).

Cheers
M4S

So many to choose

1) 911 conspiracy (all of the government "did it" ones and there many permutations)
2) Fake moon landings
3) Ted Heath a reptillian with dark eyes.
4) Bono is allegedly a singer in a rock band not a charity worker
5) That there is intelligent life on Earth
6) Intelligent design (LMAO)
7) George W Bush is the president of the United States......what you mean he is??
8) The death of 911 conspiracy theorists are "black ops hits"
9) Any NWO conspiracies. C'mon the guys running the show now (in the background) aint about to give it up.
10) Seagulls are actually interplanetary invasion fleets.


MM that'll do for now

My favorite is the one about George Bush being leader of the free world...lol

1.Marrinetts can't lead !
2. Free world ?-Where?

#1 KFC chicken making Black(only) male impotent. thats a winner 1

I love this one, but not a fan of the impotent myth as much as the more elaborate colonol sanders (A white southern man who looked like a slave owner) secret chicken recipe was actually addictive.

This was all coordinated through the kkk, the free masons and the u.s. government This was done because colonol sanders was still very upset about the whole south losing the war thing and was determined to enslave black people somehow.

All of this is of course boldly displayed in clever symbols that only the truly knowing (translated as only the truly crazy) can see and decipher. For example the SPORK, you get it, Slave/Pork, that's the white man telling the black man that we're screwing you brother and you don't even know it!

This whole addictive recipe is of course harmless to white people, and there is never any reference as to how the formula effects other races. gotta be my all time favorite, but it does beg the questions:

a) Why do I love KFC so much?

b) Where can I hire the guys who write for the black israelites.

Other favorites:

2) Dulce wars!

3) Any person having psychic convesations with celebrities.

4) Montauk Project

5) and most recently SERPO

Fun thread.

SPiderj

[edit on 5/18/2006 by Spiderj]

kfc has had a few nice myths and stories surrounding the business. Back when they went from Kentucky Fried Chicken to KFC, the rumor was, they were not legally allowed to call it chicken since they were farming a cloned boneless, featherless blob of chicken meat.

allowed to call it chicken since they were farming a cloned boneless, featherless blob of chicken meat.

I can't believe I forgot that one. That's a good one, nice catch crakeur.

KFC is a good one.

Also wasn't there one about Jack in the box (this was in the late seventies/early eighties I think) using kangaroo meat?

I've had kangaroo meat and its not bad actually.

Spiderj

[edit on 5/18/2006 by Spiderj]

Originally posted by Spiderj

I've had kangaroo meat and its not bad actually.

Spiderj

[edit on 5/18/2006 by Spiderj]

I grew up on kangaroo meat, has to be cooked just right but is a good feed. Kangaroo tail stew also goes down well. Just got to get em to stand still long enough in the pot!!

Dont look back
M4S

I'll tell you something- the Chicken conspiracy has a pint of truth in it. Kfc chickens don't have beaks (they are removed at birth) have Frankenstein limbs (due to the unnatural amount of growth hormone) and are just big bunches of deformed meat. I know, not what you want to think about when you eat KFC, but it's true.Good thing PETA is making this a priority. Sure they are all wingnuts but they can at least stop this cruelty.

"Saddam Hussein has waepons of mass distruction, Saddam Hussein is a threat to America"

I say this in jest but I heard two "drunked-up hockey Dad's" one night at a Kelsey's in Toronto...

Hey. You know why the Toronto Maple Leafs and Montreal Canadiens are prevented from playing in the Stanley Cup?

It's a comspiracy from South of the 49th parallel! Seems "the powers that be" are saving this event for the eve of an invasion! Think of it - Ontario, Quebec and much of the nation paralyzed by the spectacle of such a titanic struggle and the potential aftermath.

I remember the Argo's won the Grey Cup in about '83 or so and it was panda-freakin-monium from downtown TO to Scarborough... this would be several orders of magnitude larger in scale and perhaps not as good spirited a crowd... Ah, but for another George Armstrong...

TV ratings that large would be unheard of in any market ever! Hockey fans will know what I mean. Civil unrest can easily get out of hand... Toronto and Montreal would be vulnerable to "assitance" much like any other in a disaster. What better an opprtunity to "help"?

Thanx,

Victor K.

How about these famous political conspiracies:

-Christians burned Rome (Nero)

-Christians eat babies (Rome again)

-The Jews declared war on Germany in 1933 (Hitler)

-Muslims worship a horned goat God called Baphomet (Crusades, later attributed to the Templars so their money could be seized)

(love this crusades story about a knight who see's a Muslim praying and then thrashes him thinking he's mooning God then the Muslim comes up and says he's praying to Mecca , gotta love how little contact there was between civilizations in those times)

-Germans are polygamists (many Muslims believe this to this day)

-There was no holocaust (who can possibly believe that one?)

-Aliens built Mayan pyramids (well, not strictly historical but a good one)

-Josef Mengele works in the CIA (David Icke)

-Sumerians were fugitive dwellers of Mars (David Icke again)

-Diana was killed as a sacrifice to Diana (Icke....)


Saddam Hussein is planning to use WMDs against America using al Qaeda is a classic as well. Well, at least the history books will record it as one of the costliest hoaxes in human history.

[edit on 18-5-2006 by Nakash]