posted on Feb, 8 2006 @ 10:18 AM
OK, I really need advice and someone to talk to. 25% of this is a vent, the rest is an explaination of my problems. I was thinking a therapist, but I
figured that I'd post on the boards and maybe I'll run into someone who's been in a similar situation first.
Well, I'm 23 years old and will be 24 in August. After graduation, I feel I've done nothing with my life. Almost all of the people I know from high
school has gone and have graduated from college or trade school and are living a pretty productive life. Me, I'm still living at home with my
grandmother, working at a restaurant and barely out of community college after 4-5 years.
My problem is: I have no idea what I want to do. I have about an AA's worth of credits under my belt, by my problem is that I changed majors so many
times, got dismissed from school so many times and that at 45-50 or so credits, I don't have enough related courses to recieve an AA and even if I
did it would be pointless because I have under a 2.0 GPA. I've been through so many majors: Pre-Veterinarian, Biology, Computer Engineering,
Computer Specialist, Computer Networking and now finally I'm a General Studies Major.
It all started when I withdrew from 4 classes because I got in a bunch of debt and had to work overtime. I withdrew after the withdraw date and got 4
"F"s. I explained myself to my instructors who said they would try to explain to the school, but either they failed or didn't even try. I don't
blame them though, it's entirely my fault. Since, then it's been hard to pull myself out of the hole - financial wise and grade-wise. I'll go to
school for a semester, taking one or two courses and pass with an A. Then the following semester, I'll start working again and it'll all start
again. I'll get a D and according to my councilor, that one 'D' cancels out my 'A', so back on academic dismissal for me.
Now, I just want to get a skill to make some decent money. At 23, I'm now considered independent in the eyes of the financial department - even
through I would have considered myself as such 2-3 years ago. So, maybe I can get more aid. (Before I got hardly none, since with me working
overtime, plus whatever my father makes, I guess we made too much. Even though I technically couldn't afford classes. And at the time, my grandmother
or my father wasn't signing for loans). I really want loans over grants/scholarshops, since I feel they should go to more deserving students. Not
that I don't deserve them, I just think I've had my chance and passed it by. Now, I can sign for my own loans. Something I'd really like to do
since I don't need signatures from my parents.
Now, here's my problem. I really don't know what to do. I've signed up for the University of Phoenix so that I can major online for Information
Technology and Networking. I enjoy computers and networking, but I'm not totally sure if that's what I really want to do for the next 40 years of
my life. I wanted to major in Biology, but I may be in school for years and years to come. And even then, I'm not sure if -that's- what I want to
do, either.
However, a few good things came out of this predicament. One thing is that I've worked in a few industries, even if it was as I call it "under
entry-level' positions. I've gotten the chance to get my real estate licence, got involved with a few multi-level business projects and pondered
going into so many other fields, from becoming a herbalist to computer programming to a pet groomer to moving to Arizona and starting up a real estate
firm to just starting my own business doing who-knows-what. I've often said that once I get my actual degree in something and get situated in life,
that I'll take a few courses in my interests just because I can. My thing is, I have no idea what my actual degree is going to me.
The other good thing that happened during the years is that I've found that I can't/don't want to work in an office environment. One of those
trendy firms I've seen on TV would fit me, but what's the chance that I'll be lucky to find and be accepted into one of those, huh? I have several
tattoos and piercings - all of which I feel express myself and each one I've been up to 3 years of thought into each thing I get. Also, 50% of which
are visible. My old office job was fine with everything I had, but the job it self was tedious and the pay was terrible and there was no growth
potential. (Another reason, I need some type of degree or education! But that'll be another thread, since I don't care to bored you, the readers,
any longer with my problems.)
Well, that's it. I'd like to thank everyone for reading this far. I'm honestly lost and somewhat depressed. Unfortunately, this post is
long-winded enough so when I go to the therapist, I'll spill the rest of my guts to him/her. Also, I'm not looking for attention - just for a bit of
advice from people who might have been down a similar road before.
Thanks in advance.
[edit on 8-2-2006 by Shaione]
[edit on 8-2-2006 by Shaione]