Trained attack dolphins loose in the Gulf of Mexico! No foolin'.

observer.guardian.co.uk...

It may be the oddest tale to emerge from the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. Armed dolphins, trained by the US military to shoot terrorists and pinpoint spies underwater, may be missing in the Gulf of Mexico.

Experts who have studied the US navy's cetacean training exercises claim the 36 mammals could be carrying 'toxic dart' guns. Divers and surfers risk attack, they claim, from a species considered to be among the planet's smartest. The US navy admits it has been training dolphins for military purposes, but has refused to confirm that any are missing.

Dolphins have been trained in attack-and-kill missions since the Cold War. The US Atlantic bottlenose dolphins have apparently been taught to shoot terrorists attacking military vessels. Their coastal compound was breached during the storm, sweeping them out to sea. But those who have studied the controversial use of dolphins in the US defence programme claim it is vital they are caught quickly.

I feel for those fat German tourists vacationing in Florida, shelling out big bucks to swim with the dolphins.

"Look, Greta, zis one has a pointy thing on it's face. Ack!"

'My concern is that they have learnt to shoot at divers in wetsuits who have simulated terrorists in exercises. If divers or windsurfers are mistaken for a spy or suicide bomber and if equipped with special harnesses carrying toxic darts, they could fire,' he said. 'The darts are designed to put the target to sleep so they can be interrogated later, but what happens if the victim is not found for hours?'

Yeah, sudden 3 hour naps aren't so dangerous when you're swimming anyway, am I right?

Windsurfers, too? Wtf?


Is it just me or is this kind of hilarious?

jako






[edit on 25-9-2005 by Jakomo]

[edit on 25-9-2005 by Jakomo]

Originally posted by Jakomo

If divers or windsurfers are mistaken for a spy or suicide bomber and if equipped with special harnesses carrying toxic darts, they could fire,' he said.

If? If the dolphins have escaped and if they make a mistake, and if they are equipped.......

Why in world would the dolphins have been left in a non-secure area with a natural disastor coming, with the harnesses on? What is the likelihood of such stupidity?

Okay, I guess if any are missing, that in itself answers the question, but still.

Who knows what might happen with all the toxic backwash being pumped/flowing back into the Gulf.

Just think, mutant killer shrimp swarms attacking swimmers, a slithering mass of psychotic starfish laying siege to the beaches. We're all doomed I tell ya

As for Flipper and his pals, didn't the Simpsons once face a similar enemy?

I can't imagine these million dollar investments wouldn't be tagged and traceable from satellite.

if these dolphins were truly intelligent, they would call for jihad on the human species for destroying their ecosystem. this could b the start of ww3

Originally posted by RANT
I can't imagine these million dollar investments wouldn't be tagged and traceable from satellite.

I assume since these dolphins are military assets, they are well trained in the art of covert activity and disguise. Wont this make it harder for them to be found?



[edit on 25-9-2005 by loam]

Originally posted by elitegamer23
if these dolphins were truly intelligent, they would call for jihad on the human species for destroying their ecosystem. this could b the start of ww3

gawd, I hope they are. But do you think they think we're all the same?

Possibly the most absurd story I've heard in a while. Still, kind of cool.

I don't predict a problem because, let's face it, they're trained dolphins. They may have some weapons, but they're not about to go wreaking havoc upon the denizens of the sea. We'll find 'em soon because it's just not the kind of thing you want on the loose, simply on principle. I don't imagine they're very hard to find.

The dolphins probably considered it a naval jail break and are enjoying snapper filets from ogling tourists in Cancun.

Doubt they were swimming around armed in a holding area a before the storm hit.

www.spawar.navy.mil...

I hope this isn't true. Even if these dolphins are highly trained for military operations, they're probably incapable of taking care of themselves in the wild. There were some dolphins that were washed out to sea from New Orleans that were finally rescued and the handlers were saying they were born in captivity and didn't know how to hunt or to avoid predators etc.

Ha! The dolphins are just the start, the US Navy is now currently training baby Great Whites! Just wait until they train them up to go after scuba divers

[edit on 25-9-2005 by WestPoint23]

Originally posted by djohnsto77
they're probably incapable of taking care of themselves in the wild.

Exactly. If the story is true these dolphins will be dead in a few weeks
from starvation. They no longer have the skills necessary to be in the
wild. That was one of the problems with the dolphins who escaped
in New Orleans during Katrinia ... even when swept into the ocean they
would starve.

The US Navy had been experimenting with dolphins for many many years.

As a civilian engineer employed by the navy in the '50s and '60s, my grandfather has told me many stories about the frustration involved in trying to find a comfortable and secure method of attaching cameras and tracking equipment (weapons now, apparently) to the animals.

According to him the dolphins were being trained to monitor Navy ports for Soviet subs, mines etc.

I guess their attitude must be:

So long and thanks for all the fish!

Makes you wonder if they attempted to do an intricate backflip while whistling the National Anthem before they left.

If dolphins are dangerous imagine how easily we could save the Mid-East with a few camels.

Or maybe not.

Originally posted by WestPoint23
Ha! The dolphins are just the start, the US Navy is now currently training baby Great Whites! Just wait until they train them up to go after scuba divers

Reminds me of that scene from Austin Powers...

Dr. Evil: You know, I have one simple request. And that is to have sharks with frickin' laser beams attached to their heads!

ok, i have read this story, laughed, read it again, told my kids about it....laughed again. But there is still one thing that puzzles me.
And even though this may be obvious and i might be the only person who doesnt know how a dolphin kills people.....i'm going to ask it anyway.

So....how DO they do it?
Do they hold it in their flippers?
Do they have something strapped onto them and are trained to release something, somehow?
Please, someone put me out of this misery. Because right now, i have this image of dolphins going around, shades on, ciggies hanging out of their mouth, holding a dart gun in their flippers

[edit on 26-9-2005 by geek101]