Some Poems By me

Hey guys, this is my first thread and my first attempt at poetry. Tell me what your think! Your criticism can be positive or negative. If their any way I can improve please do so. Thanks for your time!

War:
By me(In the eyes of a soldier)

After you've fought in a war
Hell seems like heaven
Taking other people's lives to keep your own
1 shot 2 shots 3 Shots 4
Now two more bodies join the floor
You may say it aint' that bad
But lets see you go though what i've had

Death
By Me
You can never escape death
For it is everywhere
All you can do is sit and wait
For the inevitable to happen

So there you have it! Enjoy





[edit on 8/26/05 by cheesy1907]

[edit on 8/26/05 by cheesy1907]

Well done!

Thank you for sharing them with us, I look foward to what others you may have to offer,

good work

Originally posted by asala
Well done!

Thank you for sharing them with us, I look foward to what others you may have to offer,

good work

Thanks,I really apreciate it!

[edit on 8/26/05 by cheesy1907]