Waltz with Chains (SPECIAL)

Walc z łańcuchami
I.
Tańczy w środku parku
Dziewka z łańcuchami
Tańczy z młodzieńcami
Lśniącymi światłami

Trzyma za ich ręce
Nadąża krokami
Pląsa by pożegnać
Móc się z okowami

Jasne, złote światło
Ono nie zna granic
Łunem może pociąć
Różny typ metali

Ale biedna dziewka
Nie ma wiele czasu
Zanim się spostrzeże
Znów trafia do lasu

Dwóch kamieni szuka
Próbuje rozpalić
Lecz od łez są mokre
Iskrę mają za nic

Więc sama zostaje
W ciemnym strasznym lesie
Kto w końcu pomoże
Samotnej kobiecie?

Ciężki, srebny gorset
Ciąży na jej talii
Boli niczym brzeszczot
Wbity przez Moskali

Płakać już nie może
Skończyła się woda
Co płynęła w oczach
Ostała się trwoga

Modlić się do Boga
Również nie przystoi
Gdy smutku powodem
Własne kręte drogi

Więc w ramach przestrogi
Mówi dziewka młoda
Że tylko z miłości
Można ubrać słowa

II.
Co jeśli wam powiem
Że ten młody adept
Wcale nie był chłopcem
Lecz tą dziewką w sparze

Jakież to ździwienie
Że było inaczej
Jaka to różnica
Cierpi równoważnie

Nogi jej zmęczone
Podtrzymują buty
Towarzysząc w tańcu
Bezdennej pokuty

Wstydu, żalu, gniewu
Jest tu co niemiara
Zamiast się zatrzymać
Wciąż w tańcu się stara

Próbując rozparzyć
Bezskutecznie iskrę
Żeby troski własne
Zagoić jak bliznę

Chocia wie jak łańcuch
Ciężki się zakłada
Jak go było ściągnąć
Dawno zapomniała

III.
Żaden chłopak szczodry
Już jej nie przyświeci
Wszyscy dawno poszli
Do swych żon i dzieci

Tańczy w borze sama
Poszukując ciepła
Jeśliby przestała
Tańczyć to by zziębła

Dynda się ambitnie
Stąpa konsekwentnie
Głową swą nie kiwnie
Na młodzieńca w lesie

Podchodzi młodzieniec
Spyta go czy umie
Tańczyć, a on powie
Że go nie rozumie

Zadufana dziewka
Patrzy na łańcuchy
Wykonując coraz
Mniej zgrabniejsze ruchy

Kiwa się bezwiednie
W tango swoim tonie
W skrytej nienawiści
Bada jego dłonie

Młode, piękne, wolne
Od ciężkich kajdanek
Uderza ją zazdrość
Że tak żyje Franek

Odchodzi od Franka
Nic mu już nie powie
Zatrzymała oddech
W żelaznej okowie

---

Waltz with chains
I.
A girl with chains is dancing in the middle of the park
She dances with young men who shine with lights

She holds their hands and follows their steps
She dances to be able to say goodbye to her chains

Bright, golden light, it knows no boundaries
The flame can cut various types of metals

But the poor wench doesn't have much time
Before she knows it, she finds herself back in the forest

She looks for two stones and tries to light them
But they are wet with tears, so they don't care about the spark

So she stays alone in the dark scary forest
Who will finally help the lonely woman?

A heavy silver corset hangs around her waist
It hurts like a sword stabbed by Muscovites

She can't cry anymore because the water in her eyes has ended
The fear remained

It is also inappropriate for her to pray to God
When the cause of sadness is one's own winding paths

So the young wench speaks as a warning
That only out of love can words be put together

II.
What if I told you that this young adept
He wasn't a boy at all, but this trapped wench

How surprising that it was otherwise
What difference does it make if she suffers equally

Her tired legs are supported by her shoes
Accompanying her in the dance of bottomless penance

There is plenty of shame, regret and anger here
Instead of stopping, she continues to dance

Trying and failing to ignite a spark
To heal her worries like a scar

Although she knows how to put on a chain
She had long forgotten how it was possible to remove it

III.
No generous boy will ever shine on her again
They all went to their wives and children long ago

She dances in the forest alone, looking for warmth
If she stopped dancing, she would get cold

She swings ambitiously and walks consistently
She will not shake her head at the young man in the forest

A young man comes and she will ask him if she can dance and he will say
That she doesn't understand him

The self-righteous wench looks at the chains
Making less and less graceful movements

She sways unconsciously, drowning in her tango
She examines his hands in secret hatred

Young, beautiful, free from heavy handcuffs
She is struck by jealousy that Franek lives this way

She leaves Franek and won't tell him anything
She held her breath in that iron shackle

---

Why a special? Because I succeeded. Because it rhymes as a song and can be sung to a folk tune. Because it expresses everything I wanted to say. Because it has a consistent form. Because it is long, poetic and very Polish.

And because after this piece I will stop posting my works here for a long time. Maybe it made someone happy.
Anyway, thank you for all the stars and flags I received here, they mean a lot to me. This is a great forum and I'm happy to be a part of the artistic side of it.

a reply to: Agleaya

God, how powerful it would be with music and dancers...

a reply to: Agleaya

I wonder what my poems are like for foreign-language audiences who cannot experience their lyrical form and rhyming style.

I guess that foreign audiences focus more on the meaning of the poems and this may have different effects on their reception.

But that's a great thing actually.

originally posted by: Agleaya
a reply to: Agleaya

I wonder what my poems are like for foreign-language audiences who cannot experience their lyrical form and rhyming style.

I guess that foreign audiences focus more on the meaning of the poems and this may have different effects on their reception.

But that's a great thing actually.

I think some make it through although the meter and rhyme can be lost at a cost.

Poetry too can be guilty of obscurity and doubly so through translation.

Star and Flag Agleaya from one song writer to another!

a reply to: midicon

Thank you so much!

a reply to: Agleaya

I ran your poem through Chatgpt for a translation. It gave a reasonable version which could be amended to rhyme.

Just a thought Agleaya.

a reply to: midicon

Can you send me it on PM?

originally posted by: Agleaya
a reply to: midicon

Can you send me it on PM?

That was weird. When I sent it, it showed differently but now I've checked again it seems to be alright lol.