Brain Memory and Frustration Struggle (Help)

I got what people will call an elephant memory. Not in normal life, but when under pressure and in need I can recall almost all the relevant information, sometimes like a picture.

A personal problem with my brain is I tend to think ahead of my mouth and get misunderstood often. So I developed this system to slow down but even when writing and rechecking I can still be misunderstood. So I just put it the best I could and most people understanding me seems able to follow what I mean. That’s why I hate social median because it will tear me to pieces without any intent.

The biggest problem arise with frustration and my lack of patients – Example: My son started taking very long answering my messages. Fine but 2 weeks when in an urgent discussion don’t work for me.
Ok, “What the problem?” - “Sorry dad I’m very busy and I changed to Telegram doing most of my stuff there”
Good so I loaded Telegram and deleted Facecrooks. “Son I deleted facebook and am now on telegram” – “that’s great dad now we can communicate better”. It went well for about 2 weeks then nothing, still busy to sort out a problem my son seem to think is not urgent.

So I send him an SMS “What’s going on, must I send more money for the license problems?” But dad I’ve been sending you whatsup’s and thought you were ignoring it.

F__k are you kidding me, wake up son - I’m must be getting crazy

Ok, now I start thinking; does he have problems he does not want to discuss with me or did he change into a dreamer. New frustration; How can I help if he don’t ask or tell, that will be interfering

And it does not seem to end there. It seems like most friends around me are entering a state of semi consciousness. Is it the lack of means to fight the laws enforced on us or must I go see a head-fixer.

What do you think?

a reply to: ICycle2

I find it better never to chase people for their attention... just adds tension

Of course i don't have children so i don't feel that need to connect with... family... so to speak

a reply to: ICycle2


Everybody does it differently, but if you're trying to offer assistance to your son and after waiting patiently for 2 weeks you get a "sorry dad I'm busy reply" I have to tell you it's not you or your perceived "lack of patience".


He ducking and diving to avoid you, man.


You sound very reasonable. Maybe a bit too much.


Good man.

a reply to: ICycle2

Instead of using thisapp thatapp or wheteverapp, why don't you just call him?

a reply to: BrokenCircles

I do. He does not answer his phone so I gave up, maybe once out of 5 he will pick up. I think his in a meeting even if he drinks tea.

Catt's in the cradle - Harry Chappin

a reply to: 19Bones79

The thing is that I was a single parent as his mother died in front of him age 8, and even with physiological help he seems to suppress feelings afraid of hurting again. It’s like a type of distance keeping

The balance between giving attention, work and social life was luckily shared by grandparents. I did teach him to stand on his own feet from a young age but he never allowed me to bring someone else into my life. It always ended in a mess me choosing my son.

The thing is I did my best and gave what I got. But yes, I did made mistakes.

Oh honey, I can tell you from experience, you can raise them, in a loving, nurturing environment, but you CANNOT choose how they turn out.

I am going through it right now. 2 boys, raised in the same house, the same way.
One will not contact me, unless he needs money, and then screams at me when I won't give it to him.
The other one, we are close.

It can be heartbreaking. But once they become adults, you can only be there when they call. You can't force them.

Doesn't make it any easier to know that though.

I hope it gets better for you.

a reply to: ICycle2

I have utmost respect for what you have gone and are going through.

We lost our eldest when he was 5. He was with his biological father when he drowned. His sister who idolized him saw them retrieve the body.

I can't begin to tell you our experiences.

Councilors told me marriages that go through these things more often than not don't last.

We seem to be proving them wrong, but it's hard. Some days are better than others.

I left home at 16 because of the neverending insertions into my personal life.....wait, that didn't sound right.