The Shed 24

a reply to: Night Star

How's it goin!? Are you having a good Christmas day?

a reply to: DictionaryOfExcuses

My "neighbour" has "relationship problems". (Daily/weekly. It's 2 a.m. now) I tried the changing location game with the rental company but they told me no instead. # happens. So, now he's having a Christmas argument with his girlfriend.

Whoot whoooot!!!

a reply to: DictionaryOfExcuses

It's ok. Thanks for asking. Hope you had a good day.

a reply to: LightSpeedDriver

Are Christmas arguments festive?

a reply to: Night Star

I'll be honest. Judging from that response alone, you seem glum.

a reply to: DictionaryOfExcuses

When arguing about Santa, yes.

One of my favourite Christmas songs..

a reply to: LightSpeedDriver

If Santa's existence is a contentious issue with your neighbors, I readily understand your relocation request.

Of course he exists.

a reply to: DictionaryOfExcuses

I was being hypothetical. I'll try to stop.

a reply to: DictionaryOfExcuses

I was just missing some family members. Hugs

a reply to: Night Star

I'm sorry. Holidays, joyful as they can be, can also have an undertone of loneliness for me, too. Hugs back.

a reply to: LightSpeedDriver

And I was trying to be funny. Failed as usual, I see.

a reply to: DictionaryOfExcuses

No my friend.

I thought you were funny.

Look, the Aussies have a great sense of humor.

Europeans on the other hand have a limited sense of humor. The EU is trying its best to wipe out humor and it is having some success. They fail to understand a great deal. Attempting to get children to stop with the poop jokes is just silly, but there your are, the EU for all to see.

Americans have great humor, but it is like a burger. they can put anything between a cut bun and eat it. So they laugh at almost anything.

Beware The Snowflakes. A growing group that replaced humor with angst, so every time they hear a joke, they go mental.

Watching Snowflakes explode is great Aussie Humor, the best we have.

It is difficult at Christmas I know.

Always have a fart ready. If the joke fails, the fart will always bring it back. Timing is everything.

Hope this missive helps.

P

a reply to: pheonix358

Matter of fact I'm about to let one rip now.

Just hope I don't follow through.

bally

Oh man it is hard...

So on Christmas eve morning, i drank a couple of leftover beers from the fridge. Just a few. Then i realized i am not in a very good shape, time to sleep, and when i can, eat. And remember water. So i did just that on Christmas eve. Exactly that on Christmas day. Alone, with the lights turned off.

Still doing the same thing on December 26th and suddenly the doorbell rang. 2 cops. Again! I was like "What?" And they told me my mom is worried because being unable to contact. I told them that i haven't been drinking alcohol at all for a couple of days and trying to get a little bit back on my feet somehow. They replied "Good. But contact your mom" I was "OK, and then they left. Went to fb, told my mom to stop this, it doesn't matter if i am drunk or sober, online or offline, the cops are at my door. We agreed that from now on, she just assumes that i am always fine and won't bother me with the police anymore. That's it i am done with her for good.

Well, at least i got 2 birthday visitors.

Editing to add: Leaving this place. Anxiety is through the roof and i need a walk. Last time i saw a human being was Monday, and now it was the police . With ZERO provocation from my behalf. I have to go but i will return.

a reply to: DictionaryOfExcuses

You were funny. Timezones make for a fragmented interaction. My comedic keyboard agility level is depleted at 6 am. Sowwy.

All Aussies and North-Americans are mainly descended from European stock. I'm an Englishman, not a European! (If you don't think there's a difference just look at my hair and teeth!) I just happen to live in their overpopulated non-English speaking over-priced WW2 remnant. (And am politely grateful for the freedom to do so.) Certain island rules meant that it was better for me to relocate to a more tolerant place. Personal happiness, freedom to be me, sing Singing In The Rain like a boss in gay-themed outdoor-wear in a storm. Wait, what?

ETA We are all one.

ETA2 Possibly despite appearances, I am not gay.

ETA3 Not that there's anything wrong with being gay. Just to add.

Since I am in semi-hibernation mode, I greet you sleepily. A few stretches and cup of coffee hasn't done much so...Rushes off for second cup of coffee and to heat up a spinach and cheese Stromboli.

a reply to: Finspiracy

It's your Birthday? We can have a celebration of dinner and cake and dragon rides when you're feeling up to it.

Irony strikes again.

Got hired (as a temp) to go to the recycling plant tomorrow. Really was not enthusiastic but had to take the work. You know how it goes.

But anyways. Went to kickboxing today. Fun, except tore my right calf muscle. Ouch. New type of pain. Now on my back icing a painful leg injury. Can only limp. No recycling plant tomorrow.

Universe is saying, "You didn't want to go to the job, and you got what you wanted. Aren't you happy?"

And I am saying "Very funny, Universe. Veeeeery funny. Now leave me; I need to add this entry to my Dictionary of Excuses."

Universe - lost track of score, long ago
Me - after all these years, still 0