Car Stickers

Here are but a few car stickers I know, some I've found on google, some are my own

Don’t do anything in public that you wouldn’t do in private.
He couldn’t find his way out of a paper bag if it bit him.
When I think of all the people I respect the most, you're right there, serving them drinks.
We need to find a solution, even if it isn’t the right one.
Constipated people don’t give a #.
I like you as much as I like myself, only less.
Prices you can afford won’t be beat.
Predicting is difficult, especially when it involves the future.
If you notice this notice you may have noticed that this notice is not worth noticing!
I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
Don’t drink and drive…You might hit a bump and spill it.
Always remember you're unique...Just like everyone else.
I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
I feel like a hot turkey breast in a cold potato salad.
Illiterate? Write for help.
I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
Don’t be sexist – bitches hate that.
If you can read this – flip me back over.
How many undiscovered islands are left in the world?
Why is “abbreviation” such a long word?
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
What is a “free” gift? Aren’t all gifts free?
What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
How is it possible to have a civil war?
If one synchronised swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?
How come water can run, but can’t walk?
Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice?"
How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the morning?
If you are in a vehicle travelling at the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?
Why do our noses run, and our feet smell?
Whose cruel idea was it for the word “Lisp” to have an “s” in it?
If your parents didn’t have children, are your chances good that you won’t either?
Can blind people see their dreams?
If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

Which is your favourite?

I'm desperate for newies so if you have any please post...

Here are a few more I've actually seen recently:

Five out of four people can't do fractions.
I am neither for nor against apathy.
Beware of a man with a gleam in his eyes - it may just be the sun shining through the hole in his head.
Don't wrestle with pigs: you'll get all muddy and the pigs will love it.
Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.
Beauty is in the eyes of the beer holder.
The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

This made me chuckle:

When I think of all the people I respect the most, you're right there, serving them drinks.

This one I have heard before and it just makes me wonder:

Can blind people see their dreams?

Jack

Again, a few more:

Did you take a # today? Well, put it back!
Hey jerk! You are driving a car, not a phone booth
How's My Driving? Dial 1-800-EAT #
I fart to make you smell better.
I may be fat but you’re ugly, and I can lose weight.
If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport
If I wanted a bitch.....I would have bought a DOG!!!
If I would like to hear from an asshole, I’d fart!
If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.
If you took an IQ test, the results would be negative
If you want to get laid, crawl up a chicken's ass and wait!
Instant idiot. Just add alcohol.
It's men like you that make women gay.
It's time to pull over and change the air in your head!
I Wonder if You'd Drive Any Better if that CAR PHONE was UP YOUR BUTT

But my favourite one of all time has to be:

I’m constipated, I don’t give a #...

I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.

One you'd know about Wendel

Great thread

Horn broken, watch for finger!

When in doubt, GAS IT!



[edit on 24-2-2005 by dadkins]

My other ride is your girlfriend.

i have a car sticker on my cobra that reads "speed kills!.....so get the F*ck out of my way"

well it makes me laugh!

My favourite political car stickers: (If you’re Republican, stop reading now!)

A politician should do two terms - one in office and one in jail.
Annoy a politician today. THINK!
Don't be stupid. We have politicians for that!
Forget the Flag. Burn a Politician.
If Clinton is the answer, it must have been a stupid question.
Politicians & Diapers need to be changed… often for the same reason!
Re-elect Bush: I'm tired of waiting for the Apocalypse.
I don't approve of political jokes...I've seen too many of them get elected.


:bash:

i saw one that said "Beer...Helping Ugly People Have Sex Since 1865"

i though it was funny as hell the first time i saw it.


anoher on that was popular in my state was during the 2000 elections
"Sore Loserman"

Here's several that are not for kids, nor for anyone who's easilly offended. I find these rather funny.

Jesus loves you. Everyone else thinks you're a #.
My other ride is your daughter.
Dead girls never say no.
Got crank?
I # nuns.
Eat. #. Kill.
Tact is for people not witty enough to be sarcastic.
Swallow?
You will bow to me.
Drink. Fight. #.
Wash your hands after touching Christians.
I still hate George Bush.

That's all for now. I await your flames.

Dead girls never say no.

Like this one, obsidian, although I'm not sure about the nun one...I am slightly disturbed by it................

Anyway, a few more to keep you occupied, the theme for this post is religion:

Atheists are Beyond Belief
Blessed by Jesus - Spoiled by my husband.
Don't think God has a sense of humor? Look at the platypus.
Get a taste of religion. Lick a witch.
God is my co-pilot, but the Devil is my bombardier.
God must love stupid people, he made so many.
God was my co-pilot but we crashed in the mountains and I had to eat him.
Heaven won't take me and Hell is afraid I'll take over.
Honk if you are God.
I'm against the death penalty / Look what happened to Jesus.
I Have The Body Of A God... Buddha!
If God had not meant us to write on walls, he would never have given us an example.
If God intended man to smoke, He would have set him on fire.
If You Are Born Again Do You Have Two Belly Buttons ?
Jesus loves you, everyone else thinks you're an asshole.
My God is alive - sorry about yours.
My Goddess Gave Birth To Your God.
National Atheist's Day April 1.
Never drive faster than your Guardian Angel can fly.
Reincarnation is making a comeback!
Sorry I missed church, I was busy practising witchcraft.
Sudden prayers make God jump.
Take a friend to heaven!
You're the reason God created the middle finger.
You are proof that God has a sense of humor.
You found God? If nobody claims him in 30 days, he's yours!

My favourite:
If going to church makes you a Christian, does going to the garage make you a car?

And totally random:
TAKE REVENGE, S*** ON PIGEONS!




[edit on 8-3-2005 by Wendellion]

ROFL- This is awesome!! Here are a few of my favorites:
The ever so popular- Jesus loves you, but we think you are a #.
God, Save me from your followers
Nuke the gay unborn baby whales for peace
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons- for you are tasty and good with ketchup.
333- only half evil
Isis! Isis! Ra! Ra! Ra!
Honk if you love Isis
Abortions tickle
Rape is no laughing matter- unless you a raping a clown.
I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.
My cat sucked the breath out of your child.
My God can beat up your God.
Hello Cthulu (a parody of Hello Kitty)
The fastest way to a man's heart-is through the second and third rib.
God gave man a penis and a brain, but only enough blood to run one at a time.
Ah, I see the # up fairy has visited again!
What am I? A flypaper for FREAKS!
You call me a heathen, I say you are all uneducated.
I used to have a grip on reality, but it broke.
Vegetarian- Indian word for lousy hunter.
Supersadomasachisticexpealidocious
Get on your knees and beg.
I'm not a bitch, I'm THE Bitch, and it's Miss Bitch to you.
Necrophilia: Lay back and crack open a cold one.
"I like children. They are tasty." Albert Fish
Fairy: The other white chewy meat.
"So long, and thanks for all the fish!" Hitchhiker's Guide

u know what i hate the most, u f!@?in a!@holes with the freakin dumb bumperstickers against republicans. I know u probably hate to know but republicans were the right 51%. i know a few anti-democrat stickers too
The road to hell is paved with liberals
Blaming guns for people dying is like blaming spoons for rosie odonnell for being fat
work harder, millions on welfare are depending on you
I think... therefore i vote republican
vote democrat its easier than working
God created Adam & Eve not Adam & Steve
Gun control is hitting your target

I absolutely loved these Wendellion

Beauty is in the eyes of the beer holder.
I'm against the death penalty / Look what happened to Jesus.
You're the reason God created the middle finger.
Heaven won't take me and Hell is afraid I'll take over.