I'm worried about where I'll end up living when my parents are gone

a reply to: Conspiracyskeptic

Solution to your problem is pretty simple. Fly to San Fransisco, you can live like a king on the streets there. If you're ambitious, you can dress like a woman if your a man, or like a man if your a woman and run for political office. If you're a high functioning autism sufferer they'll never even notice!

The reason I am reluctant to live in a care/community home is because there has been cases where disabled people have been abused in care/community homes.

originally posted by: TonyS
a reply to: Conspiracyskeptic

Solution to your problem is pretty simple. Fly to San Fransisco, you can live like a king on the streets there. If you're ambitious, you can dress like a woman if your a man, or like a man if your a woman and run for political office. If you're a high functioning autism sufferer they'll never even notice!

That’s really quite unnecessary the dude is asking for help not some smart elic political BS. If you don’t have real input then perhaps you should just not post next time.

a reply to: Conspiracyskeptic

Along with other advice, like a life insurance policy, you could possibly pool your resources with others in order to afford something.

Heck if you are really clever and plan ahead extensively, and wait for the right moment to spring into action, you could buy a house, one with a seperate apartment either in the 2nd story of a 2 story garage, or a garage seperated from the house that can be converted to a small apt for yourself (and 1 parent, after 1 dies), or a home that is divided with a locking door separating the upstairs and downstairs...or park an RV out back, out front, pitch a tent, whatever...

The idea being that you would rent out the majority of the space to Other people, while maintaining your own privacy and distance. There are books about landlording, and also very specific laws depending on your region. Read the books. Learn the laws.

Heck a motivated landlord has many opportunities to make money, especially if you live right near them, because anything you can offer them, anything from a soda, to a carwash, to a haircut to a taxi ride, they can get without leaving home and from someone they presumably trust. Maybe even put in a soda vending machine for the roommates.



I am sorry that you are having this fear of future events. Depression stems from past regrets and an inability to move on from the past, while anxiety is caused by projecting yourself out too far into the future and worrying about what ifs, and what if nots... I myself suffer from near crippling depression And anxiety.

Having memories, and learning from the past is normal. Thinking about, and planning for the future, is also normal. The result of living Too Much in the past or in the future is that your "in the present" will suffer...

...until eventually, there is no present. There's simply no time for it. The past and the future are just too prominent, too important, the present doesn't figure into it. Nothing important, nothing that matters, is happening in the present, and that's just how it is 90% of the time...you really only have to Pay Attention about 10% of the time. The big events either already happened, or are yet to come.

It makes sense though, right?

yeah, but then I went through a period of such severe depression after my mother died, and my anxieties of the future were ever-present as well, that I put off bathing. First for a few days. Then I only bathe about once a week. This is when I learned about Baby Wipes. With these, I could go a very long time without bathing, not that I was planning to do so of course, but that is what ended up happening. I eventually went 6 months, because of procrastination, mind was simply too busy to be bothered with present concerns... my dental health was also neglected, although not to such a severe degree.


One thing to consider, that has helped me deal with such worries, is to simply accept that life is not something you control, it is some thing you experience and interact with.

Once you can accept That... it's not much more of a stretch to think, you are not in control, but, perhaps Something IS. It doesn't matter if you label this "thing" as God, Nature, The Universe, The Force, or Ordered Chaos, what does matter, is that, while you yourself are not in total control over your life, and are not aware of the endgame, your life, and existence as a whole, is Not pointless and random.

I don't really put a lot of thought into the who or the what is behind all of this... you know the "God" part. It's impossible for us to know the answer to who or what "it" is, anyway...

But what we Can ascertain, through pattern recognition, is that "everything happens for a reason"...and it is THIS that matters. That doesn't mean you don't try, it doesn't mean you don't try your hardest and never give up, it just means that, if you tried and it didn't work, maybe it just wasn't Meant to work this time.

If you have to live in a cold, damp, insulated dump, maybe that was meant to happen.

When I became an opiate addict, I didn't expect that I would gain deeper insights into myself during my struggle to recovery, becoming closer and more comfortable and more okay with myself than ever before, I never knew it would give me a vast wealth of knowledge and inside experience that the average person is simply ignorant of...I see them shaking their heads in confusion and frustration...if they knew what I knew, they would know what to do. But they don't. It turns out this opioid crisis is gonna be big business, so may parlay my knowledge into an addiction treatment center or at the very least a career as an addiction counselor. I got clean on my 1st try, and I sure didn't use the 12 step program... maybe my method could work for others. Even if it doesn't ever benefit me monetarily, I know my advice helps others and my knowledge of drugs and addiction is more and more relevant today as our family and neighbors become afflicted.

Im just saying, you never know how things are going to turn out. And, maybe a little change of routine would be good for you. I know how comforting it is to have familiarity but that also leads to stagnation. Perhaps you would not fear the future so much if you added a slight increase of unpredictability into your Daily routine. Go for a walk somewhere you don't normally go. Go to a web forum you don't normally go to, like something you would never do, and go create an account and chat with people you would normally never interact with... like some poker website, or a modified street car enthusiast site, or a website for white supremacists, or black supremacists, or some, crazy, cat website... and if you do this, I promise you will not lose your home and everyone will live happily ever! 😉

a reply to: Conspiracyskeptic

Will your parents leave you an inheritance? If so, then find a small patch of land and build a tiny house on it with a well and septic tank to eliminate those utility bills, then if you have any money left see if you can take short but useful college or uni course(s) or figure out a small cottage type industry or advertise as a labourer (if you are fit to handle physical work). If not, then perhaps you might have to seek assistance from your government.

originally posted by: Conspiracyskeptic
The reason I am reluctant to live in a care/community home is because there has been cases where disabled people have been abused in care/community homes.

I wouldn't worry about that you are an adult without a SEVERE disability if anyone tries anything self defense is your friend.

originally posted by: InTheLight
a reply to: Conspiracyskeptic

Will your parents leave you an inheritance? If so, then find a small patch of land and build a tiny house on it with a well and septic tank to eliminate those utility bills, then if you have any money left see if you can take short but useful college or uni course(s) or figure out a small cottage type industry or advertise as a labourer (if you are fit to handle physical work). If not, then perhaps you might have to seek assistance from your government.

Not really an option because even a small patch of land in non-rural Auckland is like upper hundred thousands and the council won't allow septic tanks or bore water where mains sewage or water is available.

That's only allowed in certain urban areas and rural areaswhere those services don't exist and it's too costly for Watercare to install.

There are houses available through Housing New Zealand but it's mostly used by solo parents and families until they can find somewhere to rent and the waiting list is pretty big.

a reply to: Conspiracyskeptic

Find a rich woman and marry her.

They've been doing it to us since year dot.

You might have to lower your sights, but hey ho.

I'm trying to stay hopeful but it'[s hard sometimes when everything seems to be against you.