European Heaven and European Hell

What is the difference between European Heaven and European Hell?

This joke, as I read in a magazine at the time, was going round on the Brussels party-circuit in the 1980's.
If it hasn't been heard recently, it may be due for a revival.

On the one hand, European Heaven;
Has German roads
And British policemen
The lovers are Italian
The chefs are French
And the whole place is run by the Swiss.

On the other hand, European Hell;
Has French roads
And German policemen
The lovers are Swiss
The chefs are British
And the whole place is run by the Italians.

a reply to: DISRAELI

excellent, Id leave the Italians and the French in charge of food for sure...lived in both countries, and their food and wine, is impeccable

Wouldnt put Italian government in charge of ANYTHING, never seen worse, and I lived in Greece too.

Sorry Italian friends, but you know its true

a reply to: DISRAELI

I heard a variation back in the '80s as well. Canada.

It could have had French culture, British law and American technology. It ended up with American culture, British technology and French Government.

a reply to: DISRAELI

European Heaven
A Europe united under one flag ruled by one parliament protected by one army.

European Hell
Being part of a Europe united under one flag ruled by one parliament protected by one army.

a reply to: DISRAELI

At least in Euro hell the trains would run on time?

a reply to: ketsuko
I think the premise of the joke is that they wouldn't, the Italians being the opposite of the Swiss in terms of clockwork organisation (even if they make better lovers).
Mussolini's achievement is assumed to be exceptional.

a reply to: DISRAELI

Yes, I know.

a reply to: ketsuko
You know about Italians being unorganised, or about Italians making better lovers?

originally posted by: DISRAELI
a reply to: ketsuko
You know about Italians being unorganised, or about Italians making better lovers?

Both.

I always thought the whole reason why everyone makes a big deal out of Moussolini getting the trains to run on time was because nothing else was any good and never had been and still isn't.

European hell?

An all Ireland football team

The Czech Navy will set things straight.

Cheers

a reply to: DISRAELI

On the other hand, European Hell;
Has French roads
And German policemen
The lovers are Swiss
The chefs are British
And the whole place is run by the Italians.

UPDATE 2020

Roads are okay
Germans are trying to police everyone
Swiss are stand-offish
Brits have said "Cheerio!"
And the whole place is under siege by COVID-19.

Where's that damn elevator back to the 1980s ?

Cheers