Crowd Source: Semi Truck Driver taking too much time off...

I have a room mate who is a Semi truck driver. He has now been home for well past 4 weeks from driving his Semi truck. His reason is: helping his ailing mother. He is around 60 years old. I believe he said his mother was about 75? maybe 80? I recall him receiving a phone call from the dispatching company asking him why he hasn't been driving for two weeks (that was two weeks ago.) He said he was taking the time off to see his ailing mother.

The problem is.... I hear about his casino visits. And now he has brought home a random person. A lady who works at the gentleman's club. It has been a total of 4 weeks (Come tomorrow) that he has been off from work.

How do I know if this person still has a job? He may be making payments to his rent, but at the same time I wonder if he even has a job anymore. Especially considering he is enjoying all of the **** shows on tv. And playing video games. His mother may be deathly ill, but I highly doubt he is going to see her at 9 PM at night. She is not at the hospital. I already asked. His new found friend tells me he has been spending most of his time at the casino and has been getting lucky here and there. But I have known this person for well over 5 years now.

I did some searching on the internet to see how much time is allowed for "visiting an ailing family member," "common reasons truck drivers get fired," and finally asking you guys here and now.... Is he actually terminated from the company? Because he is beginning to do all of the things found in an old Spongebob Squarepants episode. (The episode where Squidward quits his job and lives in Spongebob's house.)

Watching TV. Stealing food. Being obnoxious. Playing video games. All the while not really worried about anything unless I ask him when he is going back.

It is beginning to worry me because I can not get a straight answer from this individual. And I am beginning to think he is going to stop paying rent soon.

a reply to: GiulXainx

If you find that you cannot trust this person to ask him an honest question and then be okay with his response, you probably should not be his roommate.

originally posted by: GiulXainx
I have a room mate who is a Semi truck driver. He has now been home for well past 4 weeks from driving his Semi truck. His reason is: helping his ailing mother. He is around 60 years old. I believe he said his mother was about 75? maybe 80? I recall him receiving a phone call from the dispatching company asking him why he hasn't been driving for two weeks (that was two weeks ago.) He said he was taking the time off to see his ailing mother.

The problem is.... I hear about his casino visits. And now he has brought home a random person. A lady who works at the gentleman's club. It has been a total of 4 weeks (Come tomorrow) that he has been off from work.

How do I know if this person still has a job? He may be making payments to his rent, but at the same time I wonder if he even has a job anymore. Especially considering he is enjoying all of the **** shows on tv. And playing video games. His mother may be deathly ill, but I highly doubt he is going to see her at 9 PM at night. She is not at the hospital. I already asked. His new found friend tells me he has been spending most of his time at the casino and has been getting lucky here and there. But I have known this person for well over 5 years now.

I did some searching on the internet to see how much time is allowed for "visiting an ailing family member," "common reasons truck drivers get fired," and finally asking you guys here and now.... Is he actually terminated from the company? Because he is beginning to do all of the things found in an old Spongebob Squarepants episode. (The episode where Squidward quits his job and lives in Spongebob's house.)

Watching TV. Stealing food. Being obnoxious. Playing video games. All the while not really worried about anything unless I ask him when he is going back.

It is beginning to worry me because I can not get a straight answer from this individual. And I am beginning to think he is going to stop paying rent soon.

Wait. You are making your determination in part on the behavior of an anthropomorphic squid on a children's show?

I think there are larger problems going on here.

a reply to: GiulXainx

CDL truck drivers are one of them jobs that they need lots and lots more workers. if he did lose his job he could have another with in 10 min as a cdl driver so long as he has no dui/dwi and can pass a drug test. i wouldn't worry unless he stops paying his share of the bills.

Let me blunt: It's really NONE of your damn business. If he is still paying his rent, you have no say in the matter. What you are doing is intrusively invading his privacy. His relationship between he and his mother is not your concern. His dealings with his employer are none of your concern. You have no right to research what the rules and regs for long haul driving are. You sound like to roommate from hell. Butt out.

a reply to: schuyler

It is very concerning because if he does not pay, and is bringing in random people into my house, especially without telling me in advance. It is a huge concern.

I keep asking him questions and he can not give me a straight answer. The problem is I have seen this behavior not only in a kids show mind you, but with past experiences with other room mate situations. All of the red flags are coming up like crazy. So you better believe I have questions for him. Because the next step is drug abuse.

originally posted by: GiulXainx
a reply to: schuyler

It is very concerning because if he does not pay, and is bringing in random people into my house, especially without telling me in advance. It is a huge concern.

I keep asking him questions and he can not give me a straight answer. The problem is I have seen this behavior not only in a kids show mind you, but with past experiences with other room mate situations. All of the red flags are coming up like crazy. So you better believe I have questions for him. Because the next step is drug abuse.

Why don't you move if you are so worried about it?

originally posted by: GiulXainx
a reply to: schuyler

It is very concerning because if he does not pay, and is bringing in random people into my house, especially without telling me in advance. It is a huge concern.

But he IS paying. You're concern is made up in your own mind.

I keep asking him questions and he can not give me a straight answer. The problem is I have seen this behavior not only in a kids show mind you, but with past experiences with other room mate situations. All of the red flags are coming up like crazy. So you better believe I have questions for him. Because the next step is drug abuse.

So now you're accusing him of drug abuse with absolutely no evidence. He does not owe you any answers at all. You have no legal standing. The only issue is whatever agreement you have with regards to paying rent and the lease, whose house it is, etc. which we don't know. From what you have presented it appears you are being abusive toward him. You're being a bully. Here's hoping he kicks you to the curb.

Jealousy often seems to cause micromanaging and obsessive nosiness in roommate scenarios. If him continuing to pay rent is a concern, despite the fact that he isn't delinquent with the rent at all and therefore has given zero indication that he's not planning to pay, simply voicing that concern to him directly would probably get you more answers than snooping around in his personal affairs will.

Of course, the real reason isn't a rent concern at all. It is jealousy over the fact that he is enjoying a vacation...whether it has anything to do with his mother or not. He's not going to work and you think he should be, and he's not sharing his personal business with you, so you're stalking him and making up stories to justify your obsession.

If you don't like your life, obsessively and creepily stalking another human being and then sharing what pathetically little you find with strangers on the internet is likely not going to improve things much for you. Hopefully, one of the people you're going to behind his back for information will tell him about your creepy stalking behavior and obvious obsessive envy of him, so he can get the hell away before you do something incredibly stupid like what you're thinking about doing and contact his employer. That would be possibly the dickiest dick move of all, and you should feel stupid for thinking about it in the first place.

I will keep your roommate in my thoughts. It sounds like he needs all the protection he can get with people like you in his life.

Ummmm....Is he your roommate...or your bitch?

a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

I do not want to lose my room mate, and at the same time I do not want to have a previous scenario play out the same way as before.

Let me make that clear. The reason why I want to know if he has been fired or not is to help him obtain a new job.

But with his behavior around this place has me very concerned because I have seen it before. I'm not trying to kick him out. I am trying to help. And since I can not get a straight answer from him it seems like he is beginning to go into the stages of depression.

I don't want another overdose to happen in my life. I've already gone through that experience before and I don't want to have another nightmare happen in the hallway. With someone twitching on the floor with foam all over the carpet and seeing a leg twisted backwards.

Or have the scenario of an underaged drinker blacking out in the living room who is not my friend. Or... having the cops knocking on the door asking for the whereabouts of my room mate. Later to find out he caused a hit and run.

I want to help him if he needs it but he can't give me a straight answer. That bothers me alot.

originally posted by: GiulXainx
a reply to: Flyingclaydisk

Let me make that clear. The reason why I want to know if he has been fired or not is to help him obtain a new job.

I don't want another overdose to happen in my life. I've already gone through that experience before and I don't want to have another nightmare happen in the hallway. With someone twitching on the floor with foam all over the carpet and seeing a leg twisted backwards.

Or have the scenario of an underaged drinker blacking out in the living room who is not my friend. Or... having the cops knocking on the door asking for the whereabouts of my room mate. Later to find out he caused a hit and run.

I want to help him if he needs it but he can't give me a straight answer. That bothers me alot.

You don't seem to understand your role as a roommate. It's not your job to "help" if you have not been asked. You seem to have cooked up some very strange scenarios THAT HAVE NOT HAPPENED as your reasons for intruding on his life. That says a whole lot more about you than it does about him.

1. He's not overdosed.
2. He's not twitching on the floor.
3. He's not an underaged drinker.
4. The cops have not come knocking on your door.
5. He has not caused a hit and run.
6. He's not responsible for your freaking out.

You MADE UP all this stuff. This is all YOUR RESPONSIBILITY. This is about YOUR BEHAVIOR--not his. You are not his parent. You are not his spouse. You are not in any way related. You have no responsibility for his behavior, legal or otherwise. You have no skin in the game except rent. Though you may desperately want to "help," he has not asked you for help. I suppose these answers are really worth nothing because you seem incapable of understanding that this is none of your business. Your one recourse is to move out. I guarantee he will heave a sigh of relief if you do.

a reply to: GiulXainx

Unless you can read and understand your state and city laws regarding holdovers, check with a lawyer if something happens. Dont make something happen.

Good luck.

a reply to: tadaman

Yeah I do know the hold overs. Especially in this lease agreement. Of which has already been broken. The girl has stayed over 4 nights now and is moving in. And has brought her pet as well. We don't have any pets and I am sure we are about to get caught seeing how this dog keeps barking at neighbors that pass by. That just happened today. He keeps telling me not to inform the apartment people about the pet. And well... this is just awesome. Granted 3 people can live in here but the fine for not letting them know we have a pet is now hanging over my head. I asked him if he has the money to pay the pet deposit and he just ignored my question. Once again... we now have three people in this 2 bedroom apartment. Which again is fine. But he doesn't want to let the apartment people know she is living with us.

originally posted by: GiulXainx
a reply to: tadaman
... I asked him if he has the money to pay the pet deposit and he just ignored my question. Once again... we now have three people in this 2 bedroom apartment. Which again is fine. But he doesn't want to let the apartment people know she is living with us.

stop questioning him and start preparing to either have him evicted after he runs out of rent, or prepare to move out yourself.

thats your only option, you will not control or influence him, dont waste your energy trying, just prepare.

a reply to: GiulXainx

Just start going to the
casino all the time as well.
And be sure to take your
whole wad. That'll show em!

Sounds like it's about time for...(queue dramatic intro music)...

Ace Ventura - Pet Detective.