How high do you rate "independence" in your must haves?

Now that I have entered old age early stage, I'm thinking about the things that I rate as essential. When I use the word independence, I mean I want to live on my own, no support workers.

I realize that a benevolent facility for assisted living makes sense for many people. But there is something in me that is very uncomfortable with not living totally free of assistance.

My big desires as I move further into old age.
1. Remain independent.
2. Stay healthy as long as possible.
3. Avoid depression. Maybe not happy, but willing to be here.

I'm working on all three.

Eat

Sleep

Fornicate

a reply to: droid56

when I get older than what I am INDEPENDENCE is a must. otherwise just take me out back and shoot me

a reply to: droid56

dunno how to delete this one but somehow it was a double post

a reply to: Lysergic


Eat

Sleep

Fornicate

Dump.

Soz OP couldn't resist.


Fox.

a reply to: droid56

Feed myself, clean myself, dress myself.

Not poo myself, not pee myself, not fall asleep in awkward moments.

Be able to dance and screw.

smile and laugh.

Be at peace.

Independence and dignity in old age.

Sadly, the world seems to be designed for the young and the me, me, me culture. Older people's needs are out of sight and out of mind.

As you age you have to reach out to 'younger' people for friendship....

and to keep you grounded because the older you get the less friends

you have due to natural depletion (death)


Loneliness is a killer

I rate independence extremely highly, and so did my grandmother. Unfortunately, I watched her gradually lose that independence as she got older, and I could tell she hated it and felt like a burden. She had a large and loving family that respected her immensely and only wanted the best for her, and we did everything we could for her. I think, if you also make family and community big priorities as well, the people who love you will step in if you are so fortunate/unfortunate that you live long enough to lose independence. Don't be afraid, love and be loved, and provide support while you can, so those around you learn to do the same.

Oh, and she never went to a nursing home (except briefly to recover from a difficult surgery). She lived with family when she couldn't live alone. I think she was OK with that, because when she was younger, she always had family staying with her (she had anywhere from 3-8 grandkids come live with her in "Camp Granada" every summer).

I worked in nursing homes for many years. Every resident felt the same way as you. I am 67, every morning I wake up ready and able is a gift.

I have actually thought long and hard about this. When does "living" become nothing more than "being alive"? My personal viewpoint is that I will never allow myself to get to the point that I can't take care of myself. How is it "living" when you can't dress yourself? Or cook your own meals or go to the bathroom by yourself? When you are dependent on someone else for everything you do?
There has to be some dignity in life and if I can't have that, I'll take matters into my own hands.

originally posted by: paraphi
Independence and dignity in old age.

Sadly, the world seems to be designed for the young and the me, me, me culture. Older people's needs are out of sight and out of mind.

Never a truer word spoken or written

a reply to: MissCoyote

I am going to walk into the woods and find a bear den and go to sleep in it. Preferably one that has a sleeping bear in it.

a reply to: droid56

That's the good old American spirit!

I honestly think that some of the Asian cultures have it right, all along. Multi-generational families living together, caring for each other and all contributing in many ways to the overall health of the family.

As for me, I rate my independence highly. When I go down, I want to go down swinging.

a reply to: kelbtalfenek

But I'm a Canadian. The desire to remain independent ran through my family. It wasn't based on our country.

originally posted by: droid56
a reply to: kelbtalfenek

But I'm a Canadian. The desire to remain independent ran through my family. It wasn't based on our country.

Still a frontier based culture...

2nd