What's a Bully? Just a Bag of Water.

I have an autistic little brother. He used to watch all kinds of videos on youtube. He loved seeing the travel vlogs some of the people put out and had a couple favorites he would watch over and over.

One day he mentioned how awesome he thought it would be to be able to make videos and show them to everyone. I saved a few dollars and bought him a little gopro type camera. He loved the camera, I don't think I've ever seen him so excited about something as he was when he realized it was really his.

He started learning how to use it and made a couple of videos, but he didn't think they were good enough, so he kept trying. He worked a week on the first video that he wanted to put on youtube and was even more excited about it than he was when he got the little camera.

He posted his video and waited what seemed like forever for the first few people to watch it. A couple days later he was really happy to get a notification that he got his first comment on the video. Unfortunately, that joy quickly turned into something different. The comment was extremely inappropriate. Then someone else replied and made another horrible comment about how he talks. Once we realized what was going on, my sister deleted his video. She thought she was doing the right thing, but that just upset him more.

It was the saddest thing I've seen in person. It truly broke his heart. He was so sad, but he didn't say a lot about it. He just laid the camera down on his desk and hasn't touched it since.

I wanted to do something, anything, but I just didn't know what I could do. A few days ago I came across a guy who is trying to make a difference with a project called "#createNOThate". I think it's great and it gave me an idea of how I could maybe do my part to help stop some of the online bullying, or at least try to let some young people know that bullies are just people and everyone has been a bully or has been bullied at some point, even if they don't realize it.

The video above is what I came up with. I'm not Martin Scorsese by any stretch of the imagination, but I hope you guys like the video and the thread. If you have any questions, I'll do my best to answer them. Thanks for reading.

a reply to: esteay812

If your brother ever posts another video, shoot me a PM and I'll be happy to view and post some positive and encouraging words for him. He sounds like a bright and creative person with some big ideas and I love seeing all the amazing things creative people come up with.

I'll watch your video now. Kudos for being proactive and productive in the face of the fugly. That's pretty awesome too.

a reply to: Boadicea

I've been casually trying to coax him back into giving it another shot. Maybe he'll get his confidence back soon and just go for it.

Thanks for the support and kind words.

a reply to: esteay812

You should post the video link here next time he makes one so we can hook him up with some friendly comments.

a reply to: esteay812

His well-intended and proud moment was dashed by the society we live in. And all it takes is one.

We have members here who use derogatory "terminology" as normal wording and as labels in general conversation, with little realization that the "terms" or "phrases" they are indiscriminately using...represents real people, with real afflictions, conditions and issues either born with or acquired. And thats sad...and I feel for your little brother.

Try to encourage him and try...TRY best as you can..to get him to understand that there are some in this world who will always be bad, say mean things and criticize. Tell him to not pay attention to those, but to move on to the good ones, comments and people.

If he can get to understand its never him...but others with the problem...then maybe he can concentrate on the good people, who make friendly commentary, and who enjoy what he does...as much as he does.

Good luck and God Bless both of you!

MS

a reply to: Idreamofme

I will for sure. We're going on a couple of short trips this summer, I'm trying to concoct a plan to convince him to take another shot at it and not worry about what anyone thinks. In theory it seems like the situation is a good teaching opportunity. It's just a little different trying to show him the different ways to look at it than it is for a kid without autism.

a reply to: esteay812

The love you have for your little brother is what shines most for me in your post OP... how thoughtful to get him a camera and how excited he must have been.

How sad that he had to be so disappointed bt the callousness of the internet.😕

I hope your little video helped heal some of the sting... I'm sure he loves it and loves his big brother with all his heart🙂

a reply to: mysterioustranger

Thanks MS.

I lurk on ATS everyday and read a lot of the threads and comments. It's amazing some of the stuff that gets said, I really think the people must not think it through before they post a lot of those things.

You know, it's a work in progress trying to help him understand different things he's gonna experience and letting him know that it's just life and how it is sometimes. I think as he gets older he'll understand more and maybe some of these experiences will help him out down the road.

a reply to: Sheye

Hi Sheye. Thank you for the kind words, it does mean a lot, even if you don't realize it. He's a good kid, he really seems to love everyone

a reply to: esteay812

Youre welcome...I tend to think the REAL humanity is with people like him because they are so "pure-of-heart"...and mostly unaffected day to day by the world "outside".

Peace

a reply to: esteay812

I just want to tell you what an Awesome brother you are! He is very lucky to have you in his life.

I wholeheartedly agree with IDreamOfMe.
please add a link here the next time he makes a video.

I'm sorry that those sociopaths ruined his first experience,but I hate to see him quit on something that he obviously enjoys.

Here is your worlds greatest big brother medal.


Respectfully,
~meathead

a reply to: Mike Stivic

Thanks for the medal, meathead, I'll wear it proudly

originally posted by: esteay812
a reply to: Boadicea

I've been casually trying to coax him back into giving it another shot. Maybe he'll get his confidence back soon and just go for it.

Thanks for the support and kind words.

Did you take him on a tour of comments on YouTube? A lot of comments sections are nasty, vile places. It might help him to see that he is not special that people are very, very unhappy and sad and want to make others as unhappy and sad as they are.

Another option is to simply block the comments. I think that should be an option for his videos. Then, you are strictly dealing with likes/dislikes and number of views.

originally posted by: ketsuko

originally posted by: esteay812
a reply to: Boadicea

I've been casually trying to coax him back into giving it another shot. Maybe he'll get his confidence back soon and just go for it.

Thanks for the support and kind words.

Did you take him on a tour of comments on YouTube? A lot of comments sections are nasty, vile places. It might help him to see that he is not special that people are very, very unhappy and sad and want to make others as unhappy and sad as they are.

Another option is to simply block the comments. I think that should be an option for his videos. Then, you are strictly dealing with likes/dislikes and number of views.

Maybe a mixing of the two ideas would work best..

Have him upload the video to YouTube with comments disabled,then link the video here where we can comment. He can see his likes there and get positive feed back here.

Just a thought..

Respectfully,
~meathead

a reply to: ketsuko

That's a good idea and something like meathead said, below your comment, would be good too. If he gets back into it I think we'll try something like this. Just need to find the right balance between protection and not having him be over-sheltered.

a reply to: esteay812

Just be very, very sure that he never hinges his worth or the worth of anything he does on the comments of random internet people.

That way lies madness.

a reply to: esteay812

What I've noticed is in Youtube comments ,no matter the subject matter,how well was presented,there is always some clown hating his life and have to try and bring someone down to their level,in truth their opinions don't matter,but with someone trying to grow self esteem another barrier they must overcome,but this is life,can't escape reality,just look at those liberal protestors,they will say anything to make themselves look good