I am a sadist. I think. I have never had a masochistic partner so I don't know. I certainly don't inflict pain on my wife because I don't think she
will enjoy it.
As a sadist I like to be in control. I like to cause pain. However, I also drip with empathy. I would never cause someone pain who did not enjoy being
in pain. I do not kill insects in my house - I love my cat and my children. I don't even spank my kiddos when they are bad. I don't enjoy their pain
because THEY don't enjoy their pain.
I tell you the truth, I am terrified of talking about this with my wife because I think she will be horrified at me. (we have a great sex life doing
the "normal" stuff) It might be the only thing I haven't openly discussed with her. The crazy thing is she has the type of personality that might
actually enjoy being super submissive.
Perhaps there is a spectrum of sadists. Perhaps there are some that just enjoy cruelty for cruelties sake. I would say those people lack empathy and
therefore are also psychopaths. I think there are many, many people like me that - if given the chance - would enjoy giving pain to others AS LONG AS
THEY ENJOYED THE PAIN. This isn't evil or even a disorder.
The OP of this thread came up with an example of a "sadist" teacher who degraded students and caused harm to them. This would be a "sadist" that
lacked empathy. This teacher would be what psychologists call an "asshole" he might even be a psychopath. Although those are rare. Regardless, the
example is crap. Consider:
You (I will assume) enjoy sex. You get pleasure from orgasming and closeness and the whole shebang, and hopefully from giving others those same
feelings. I think we all understand that even though we enjoy sex and desire it - it wouldn't be fun to have sex with someone that doesn't want to
have sex with you. That's rape. If you want to rape you should seek help.
Sadists enjoy inflicting pain. They get pleasure from being in control and dominating another person, sometimes that involves spanking or other forms
of sexual pain. Sadists understand that even though they enjoy such acts and desire to do them - it isn't fun to do them on someone that doesn't want
to have pain inflicted on them. Consequently, that is also rape - also battery lol. If you want to rape you should seek help.
Masochists enjoy suffering. They get pleasure from being submissive and being dominated by another person, sometimes that involves being spanked or
other forms of sexual pain. Masochists understand that even though they enjoy such acts and desire to experience them - it isn't fun to have them done
them by someone that doesn't want to do them. Actually I am not sure how this part of the analogy would work - does the masochist - like - jump in
front of the softball bat as the player is playing? I don't know because I am not a masochist and masochists are so damn passive I love it. - But if
they did jump in front of the bat - I think that would be battery? I also don't know if a masochist would derive pleasure from being tortured by an
actual psychopath. Maybe. Who knows.
Here is a summary - Sadists are not evil. Masochists are evil. People that do # to others without consent are doing crimes. People that do # to other
people without consent and no regret are psychopaths. Psychopaths are not evil. They have a problem with their brain. They can't experience
empathy.
edit on 18-7-2022 by tylowill because: (no reason given)