I need some advice It's roommate problems

a reply to: Kazber

The place allows you to smoke indoors, so I'm struggling to see the problem. If two newcomers object to the fact that you smoke then just remind them of this house rule, taking care to point out that it was a condition for your accepting the tenancy.

If they still object then invite them to sample the hospitality of any of the numerous similar establishments where smoking indoors isn't allowed.

originally posted by: TiredofControlFreaks
a reply to: VaticNZ

Have you ever seen a ceiling blackened with soot from burning candles. Candles create odours and release cancer causing chemicals.

How are people ok with burning candles but not smoking? Do candle lovers have more rights than smokers.

How is it ok to burn a candle but demand to be able to intrude in a smokers home and impose their tastes on others?

Tired of Control Freaks

How close to the ceiling and/or big are your candles?!
Most people burning candles these days do so for atmosphere and aroma.

Smoking inside STINKS. Plain and simple fact. While gross, licking the soot from the ceiling won't hurt you. Lick that nice sticky nicotine and you'll probably have a heart attack, a massive seizure at least. It's well proven that secondhand soot er smoke is extremely carcinogenic.

We are making a choice to slowly kill ourselves. Inflicting that on others just isn't basic humanity. I guess it comes down to politeness and respect for others.

As always, just my humble opinion


Peace
V

a reply to: intrptr

Absolutely NOT YOUR BUSINESS! Did you learn NOTHING from the election?


The deplorables are fed up with being told what to do. Government has no business in the private lives of its citizens and neither do others!

The OP is an adult. When he wants help, he will ask for it!

Do candle burners worry about who they bother. Do people who cook food with objectionable smells worry about who they bother? Do people who use fire places and wood stoves worry about who they bother.

We are a community. Sometimes one member bothers another. Sometimes it needs to be addressed and sometimes there needs to be tolerence.

Legal activities, reasonable undertaken in one's own home are an example where tolerence is called for.

These girls must have smelled smoke when they first viewed the room. They knew that there smokers in the house and yet they still rented to the room. Who are they now to lay rules upon others in the private portion of the house?

Oh, I see. Snow flakes who demand social justice and pretend to be the victim. As usual.

Tired of Control Freaks

a reply to: VaticNZ

Many many things stink! Different people react different ways to smells. I almost throw up at the smell of roses.

Cigarette smoke has smelled the same since tobacco was first smoked. Until a madison avenue campaign to change peoples' opinion, most people did not find the smell objectionable (always some but not most).

You don't like it? So what! I don't like the smell of purfumes or colognes.

Either we all avoid smelling of anything or we are tolerent of other peoples smells!

Which is it? Rules must be applied to all or to none. Smokers are not your victims.

Tired of Controls

a reply to: TiredofControlFreaks

Absolutely NOT YOUR BUSINESS! Did you learn NOTHING from the election?

Anything on ATS forums is my business as is my opinion.

a reply to: intrptr

And I repeat: The OP did not ask your opinion. It wasn't wanted or solicitated. You are imposing your opinion on an adult who did not ask for it!

Why don't you start a thread advising smokers how to quit? That would be appropriate. This is not!

That is MY opinion and I am entitles to you and since you chose to express your unsolicitated opinion, I am allowed to give it.

Tired of Control Freaks

a reply to: TiredofControlFreaks

Fahrenheit smells like weed killer to me, sooooo your example is tempting

Seriously though, you are correct in all of your statements.
If the lease says he's allowed to smoke then smoke if you desire.

Maybe try a portable dehumidifier? Basically air filtration? If you care that is.

Peace
V

Judging from the way you described it they knew what they were getting into. That's where the issue would be. If they signed a lease with the understanding that any smokers would do so outside it could cause some issues. However, if they were well aware that there was smoking allowed inside the building it was their choice and you have no obligation to change your habits. The social dynamic may turn and that is something you may want to consider. People act strangely when they do not get their way. If you think it might lead to more trouble take the high road until you can find another place or they move. If not keep doing what you are doing. If they have an issue that is for the landlord to decide. Again it boils down to what they thought they were getting into when they signed on. Try talking to them and explain you will be as considerate as possible.

I have allergies so I wouldn't even touch a place that had a smoker. I would not try and make them change when I got there because of me.

a reply to: VaticNZ

V.

Did you miss the part where the OP was considerate, putting something under the door, giving up the right to smoke in any part of the house but his own room? Did you miss the part where he specifically went out of his way to rent in a house where smoking was allowed?

There is no appeasement of bullies. These girls deliberately rented a room in a smoking household and then deliberately demanded that their own personal tastes be accommodated at the expense of others.

Air filtration does not replace that particular chill that runs down your spine when you get to bully others and enforce yourself on them.

Nothing this person does will ever be good enough. Witness that last 30 years of anti-smoking where smokers smiling acceded to every demand. Now when they are only allowed to smoke outside, the bullying is still continuing.

Whatever makes you think that a smoker will ever do anything that is enough for these bullies. You already know what will happen.

If he agrees to go outside to smoke, there will be complaints about ashes or the appearance of butts in a can. Everytime he enters the house, the room mates will make a big to do about how he "stinks" etc.

He may as well make a stand now because it only gets worse from here on out.

His first mistake was agreeing to smoke in his room when the custom in the house was to smoke in the common areas.

He needs to go on the offensive now. He needs to complain about the smell of perfume, cosmetics, candles, what they choose to cook etc.

Bullies don't stop on their own. You need to take action to stop them.
Tired of Control Freaks

originally posted by: TiredofControlFreaks
That is MY opinion and I am entitles to you and since you chose to express your unsolicitated opinion, I am allowed to give it.

How exactly does that work? LMAO.

NO UNSOLICITED OPINIONS ALLOWED BUT IF YOU GIVE THEM SO WILL I.

Way to stand up for your own position. Hypocrite. Lol.

a reply to: WakeUpBeer

So what?

Tired of Control freaks

a reply to: TiredofControlFreaks

So nothing. That's it. You're not a man of your convictions after all.

a reply to: WakeUpBeer

Try me!

Tired of Control freaks

a reply to: WakeUpBeer

You apparently have absolutely no problem with one adult counselling other adults how to submit to their bullies.

I do. I am absolutely firm on that point.

Tired of Control Freaks

a reply to: TiredofControlFreaks

This has nothing to do with bullying and forcing one's will upon another.
The OP has posted asking for advice. He's received some.

He can a) do as you have suggested or b) take whatever, if any, advice he wants and do what he wants

If he's looking for permission to say F*** you, then you've given him that. Yay for freedom! If he's seriously considering that smokers are basically outcasts these days and is it really worth fighting for, or is it time to give up? He's been offered advice as sought.

Peace
V

a reply to: TiredofControlFreaks

Well I can't speak for you as a whole, obviously. Only this one instance where I observed you scold another member for giving his unsolicited opinion (And let's be honest, it was solicited. The OP asked for advice. Any advice.). Then you feel entitled (your words) to give said poster your unsolicited opinion.

Not a huge deal really. It means nothing to me. Just gave me a good little chuckle. That and your smokers passion. To each there own I say. I envisioned you as an anti anti-smoker. Lol.

Carry on! I meant no offense. Just amused by this non event.

Cheers! Or.. rather, a gentlemen's tip of the pipe.

I'll fill mine with the whacky kind.

a reply to: TiredofControlFreaks

I didn't read anything about the OP being bullied. Did you? Or did you read into his post and get a little triggered yourself? Maybe he was bullied. Maybe they talked to him about it politely. Maybe they are straight up you know whats. Idk. Neither do you. I'm not going to be so quick to judge the non smokers of that house as I know next to nothing about them or their personalities.

I am on the side of the OP here.

Unless the lease or landlord says otherwise...

Smokers gonna smoke!

a reply to: WakeUpBeer

And you know what? I will politically support the innate right you have to live you life in your own way.

I spent 50 years falling for government propaganda about whacky tobacy and standing by while your kind spent years in jail for the most innocent of offense.

I was wrong. it wasn't until they came for smokers that I understood what druggies were going through. It was then that I understood what institutionalized and social bulling really was.

Carry on my friend and so will I.

Tired of Control Freaks

a reply to: WakeUpBeer

Walking into a communal rental situation where you know smoking is allowed and then demanding to control the behaviours of others is bulling.

The girls could have just as easily rented rooms in houses where smoking wasn't allowed. Its not like there are none available.
They chose to enter into the situation and imposed their demands on others in their own homes.


That is bullying.

Tired of Control Freaks

a reply to: TiredofControlFreaks

I agree for the most part. Not entirely.

However what I disagree with is ultimately made moot.

Because at the end of the day, they knew where they were renting rooms.

So they can deal with it or move out.