Today some things happened

a reply to: oblivvious

Than make sure to pass your knowledge on to them. While I hate men acting like boys. Boys will be boys. They are acting off urges and trying to refine how they act, and they need your denial and input.


Also, the land of adults is often an unpleasant one. I assure you as a strong male I have experienced plenty of unwanted experiences, though they are what made me strong.


I was raised by my mom and my sister if love to say you don't deserve any of that, but they are stronger than me from their experiences and I look up to them for it.

a reply to: oblivvious

Honestly, sometimes, you SHOULD f some people up over that. Sometimes pain gets a point across that words often don't.

a reply to: oblivvious

Don't sweat it sweets, if you are attractive that can make guys nervous.

They want to show respect, sometimes all thumbs...

What age group do they hail from?

a reply to: oblivvious

hahahahahahahahaha thanks for the laugh!

Also I hate to do it but I will. Because if you were my sister I would be critical and say my point.

You want the attention, and here you have it. But the flip side of attention is when you get it, you get positive and negative. No one gets to pick and choose. So here it is, if you don't like it, than don't seek it, like with this thread.

Didn't want to be an asshole but you obviously wanted more by posting this thread.

a reply to: oblivvious

stop talking to boys. Really. Go for older guys or wait until thats more of an option for you...Just have fun and date sparingly.

These are boy issues. Trust me, men arent this retarded.

EDIT TO ADD:
I see some beat me to the punch. So you see. Adult males are not this retarded.

Just keep smiling

Sorry to hear about your Grandmother, my condolences to you and your family.

originally posted by: oblivvious
I'm short, have big brown eyes, smile a lot and I cry when I pet new dogs. It seems like it's natural for (mostly) men to immediately give me some type of attention. I get asked for my number, cat-called, flirted with.. No complaints here because there's nothing to complain about with any of this behavior. I think it's all pretty normal for a girl to experience. Even some girls (younger in age, but taller than me) tend to call me "cute" "tiny" and such.

*Men are not pigs.

**I don't have a very strong, commanding personality.

The problems comes with the following (today):

Using my head or shoulder as an arm rest... I want to rip your arm off now, thank you.

Assuming I cannot carry anything heavier than a gallon of milk. Did I ask you for a hand? No? Can a rip that one off?

Hugging me. Suddenly. When did it become OK to randomly hold onto someone 1) you don't know that well 2) who did not invite you to smother them or 3) wants to rip your arms off?

Threatening me when I'm upset.

???? You're going to "hurt" me if you see me looking upset again?!?2rwegjwrgwrglrg

Asking me if I have my period.. then telling me how gross periods are. While making vomit noises. GO F*CK YOURSELF!!!

Telling me it's ok that I don't know a lot about a topic because I'm small, cute and can get away with being stupid. My eyes are up to your chin, so ripping your throat out...

This isn't some crazy-feminist (no issue with feminism) rant. This is just sh*t that happened today that drives me crazy and I feel like it's because I'm a small female. I don't want this type of sh*t to happen. I openly tell people to leave me alone, politely or however I need to say it to get my point across. I don't laugh it off after a certain line has been crossed.

I don't complain so much but I needed to just rant about this a little bit tonight. Too much has gone on recently, with 4 deaths in the family and other problems popping up around every corner. This hasn't been a particularly hard day or anything, but a couple of things happened that made me want to rant a little bit about it.. I went to work, was annoyed, got home, that was that. These aren't the worst things I've had happen to me.. Like I said, I just felt like ranting about them tonight.

It's just one of those days,

edit:

this is honestly just a short meaningless rant that i needed to get out before the day was through. don't take offense to anything i've said.

edit: changed the title of my post since it's bothering people.

** my bad mood was mainly because i've had 4 deaths in the family this year, the most recently my grandma a couple of days ago. the way i was expressing myself was by keeping to myself instead of chattering away with everyone like i would normally do at work.

Hmmm, that all sounds like I'm lucky to be a non A-hOle Man. I'm sorry 😐. You sound really nice and I'm sorry I can't be there to tell these Delta Bravos to leave you alone before you go Wookie on them and go to prison for tearing some Dill holes arms off. Don't get me wrong, I'm a very happily married man (been with my wife for 9 years) I want to be there for you as a big brother type (6' 195lbs) Good luck, sister!

I know whats wrong with the day... stuff always happening, it needs a holiday.

Last I went to college a friend was small framed as you describe yourself and I had the urge and refrained and said I just want to pick you up and throw you in the air a few times and catch you and have no idea why... she said I'm pretty used to it that kinda happens a lot.

It was a complusion that had some brakes not everyone has brakes on their compulsion vehicle.

a reply to: oblivvious

My ex-employer would lean on my shoulder sometimes as she passed behind me while I was sitting at my desk.

I never said a word - I'd just drop my shoulder so she nearly lost her balance. She never had the nerve to complain.

I hope life brightens up for you. You've had a rough time and some of those people who have been annoying you would probably be mortified if they knew how much they'd made things worse. Why not try explaining to them that you're grieving and need a little space?

I might be misunderstanding the OP- if so sorry, I tried! But it's natural people will tend to place it into their own experience in trying to understand...

It sounds like you've had problems with people not respecting your boundries. That doesn't mean necessarily hostile, but even in affectionate ways. I have had that problem for a long time. I am very empathic, sensitive, and care about others- I am transparent and honest. People sense that. People tend to like me, but also not respect my space.

With age, I came to understand that I didn't put those boundries up in a clear enough way. I'd been educated in a way that was always emphasizing the necessity of being kind and open to others, and that it is bad- egotistical- to ever close your mind to anyone else.

I was started upon meditation and exercises to "open" my chakras wider; to dissolve the limits of self and merge with all, since I was five years old.

It wasn't until I was forty that I realized I feel much better when I meditate upon tightening those chakras to smaller more compact energies within me.

I raised my kids in a different culture, in which the other moms were teachign their toddlers to stand up for themselves before they could speak- I'd be telling mine to share, while they applauded their kid grabbing toys away from others and refusing to share! I thought it was crazy. But eventually I came to the conclusion that a balance is needed, and if you don't learn how to be egotistical a bit, you will just be run over and disrespected by those who do. No matter how nice you are, no matter how kind, sweet, understanding or wise you might become, they'll do it, even if it is not done on purpose.


Just going through the actions (tell them to move off) is useless if it is not backed up with a real internal sense of boundry.
The body language will convey the truth (why some people don't need to SAY that to have people respect them).

It might be useful, then, for you to stop trying to be understanding and kind in your head?
Perhaps some men are pigs?
Perhaps you don't need to defend them, to yourself or to anyone else?

Or maybe I am just talking to myself. I tend to argue with my own feelings, trying to make myself stay balanced, even when I should just be wholeheartedly defending myself and not others.

Sorry to hear about your grandma, it's hard stuff to deal with.

originally posted by: oblivvious
a reply to: dogstar23

well i'm 21 years old, i get it mainly from the guys around my age, older men don't bother me so much as visit me at work often and make polite small talk, which never bothers me.

i'm just ranting about today, but i know this happens to basically everyone and one point or other based on how they look, if they're male or female, etc hahaha

Ok, yeah, in some things, mainly things to do with women, us guys are profoundly slow learners. Rant on and know that most of them will grow out of it.