I am Jacob, and I am on a journey with no clear goal

Hello, my name is Jacob and I am on a journey with no clear goal. I am here to share my ever growing knowledge of existence, but before I begin here's a little about myself in this current state of existence.

I am severely bipolar, a gender dysphoric and a heavy drug user. Discredit me all you will, but I am here to share. I am not here to convince people of my opinion. Whether i'm upbeat, a stoner, or any other personality trait is irrelevant yet so vast that I cannot explain myself with the words currently available in the English language. If I had to choose one, though, it would be "eccentric". I make enough money to survive off my Youtube videos, I can't get disability and am way too messed up to work. The last time I tried to work a "real job" I walked around all day with a boxcutter just waiting for somebody to cross me so I could slit their throat. I quit that job when I went to the bathroom and realized I was bleeding from my legs uncontrollably for reasons I had either completely forgotten or were completely unknown to me. I was a cutter during my teenage years, so I probably did it to myself.

I took the red pill only recently, I won't say when though because to me time is completely circular and irrelevant. This bothers me greatly. I'm not even sure how we perceive time, what it's made out of, if time is flowing backwards or if such a thing even exists.

I am a Wiccan and I practice magick. I am also a dreamer, my spirit animal is the owl (big surprise) my angel numbers for the past 11 years or so have been 111 and before anybody even asks yes ghosts exist. I've seen them.
Also, mermaids exist
aliens exist
the illuminati exists but it's completely different from what most people think it is
and science is not an explanation but a question

I could keep writing all day and get into topics as complex as the omniverse and as simple as silence, but i'll end with one final message.

We know nothing.

Feel free to converse, ask me about things or whatever else. I'll probably be on all day.

The Peace of our Lord Yeshua The Messiah, the Love of God and the Fellowship of The Spirit of Holiness, be with all of you. Amen.

a reply to: WeActOnImpulse

Welcome....

post up some of your youtube videos and I'll show you mine.

You are in good company because most here don't have a clear goal either.

Hi Jacob, I wish you well. Now drugs tend to fog up one's journey when one is not sure of where one wants to go. Are you able to stop using for short durations, so that you can visualize properly? Our brain has receptors to handle drugs, but that does not mean you are being taken to a place of spiritual reality. Little is known of how the brain functions under the influence of certain drugs.

a reply to: WeActOnImpulse

Hello, my name is Jacob and I am on a journey with no clear goal.

I dunno about some other things, but its okay not to be goal oriented.

Now stop mokin' that s***.

(and welcome)

Severely Biploar
Gender unhappy
cutter
...took the red pill only recently
not sure how we perceive time
Wiccan
Practice magic
Owl = spirit animal
111 is your "angel" number
Ghosts exist, you've seen one
Mermaids exist
aliens exist
Illuminati exists but is different than what we all think
Science is a question
We know nothing.

You classify yourself as eccentric.

Well, I'd say you cracked that egg wide open.

Being severely bipolar explains most of what you have written.

originally posted by: olaru12
a reply to: WeActOnImpulse

Welcome....

post up some of your youtube videos and I'll show you mine.

You are in good company because most here don't have a clear goal either.

Yeah here's some of my favorite videos, they're a little goofy but it's one of the few times in my life i've had pure, unadulterated fun. I plan to make goofy videos like this again. I am eager to watch your videos.
Sonic and Amy Trippin on Acid www.youtube.com...
Yoloswag420blazeit episode 1 www.youtube.com...
fake commercial I made for a contest www.youtube.com...

Welcome, we're thrilled. You should fit in quite nicely here.

a reply to: WeActOnImpulse

originally posted by: WeActOnImpulse

originally posted by: olaru12
a reply to: WeActOnImpulse

Welcome....

post up some of your youtube videos and I'll show you mine.

You are in good company because most here don't have a clear goal either.

Yeah here's some of my favorite videos, they're a little goofy but it's one of the few times in my life i've had pure, unadulterated fun. I plan to make goofy videos like this again. I am eager to watch your videos.
Sonic and Amy Trippin on Acid www.youtube.com...
Yoloswag420blazeit episode 1 www.youtube.com...
fake commercial I made for a contest www.youtube.com...

Here are some of mine....
www.youtube.com...
www.youtube.com...
www.youtube.com...

a reply to: WeActOnImpulse

God made us for some reason. We have a goal and a purpose, its just that it is probably beyond our small conception.

We can choose to fight against an inevitable goal or simply let go, making our selves available to whatever God sends our way and 'enjoying the ride' (no matter how up and down).

a reply to: olaru12

I really enjoyed the music, and the firefighting thing was directed really well. The first account has a different name from the other two videos, but i'm not giving it much thought. Nice videos I enjoyed them

Goal is not the answer the journey is

a reply to: olaru12

Why dont you guys make a short movie, you got loads of material in here for a script

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originally posted by: yulka
a reply to: olaru12

Why dont you guys make a short movie, you got loads of material in here for a script

No, we aren't material we are real life,

a reply to: InTheLight

No id probably say you are some well defined scripted material for an illusion made real in your mind