Electronic Customer Service - &%@#!

Is it just me?! Or are you having problems trying to speak to people when you need help too?! Forget automated telephone systems...that's not what I'm talking about....

I'm talking about a group of people who create a FAQ/Tutorial system that they think is bullet-proof....and when there's a question you need an answer to that their genius minds didn't think up, you have to send an "electronic ticket" requesting help....

Maybe someone got it...I don't know....And even if they did, I'm going to have to sit by my computer all day and check my email 24/7 to get a reply that's just going to take further clarification and more waiting...

And the kicker is....These people have a customer support phone line....But they will NOT show it to you...

Having been a CSR before, I can tell you why! CSRs, to the big cheeses all over the world, are overpaid and overworked....They want to replace them with computers b/c they're the only non-living machines capable of doing the work without the pay...

Well - I'm the old-fashioned guy who prefers to talk to someone over the phone to get my technical assistance...

And if they have a website, you literally will have to read every single page...and if you're lucky enough to find it, it's on some obscure page, like "About Us: Why We Want Your Money" halfway down in a little box covered up by a picture of some smiling jackass, written out with the letters instead of the numbers so it blends in even more - something like - 800WEDNTCR....

AARRGGHHH!!

I got pissed off about this b/c it's even happening here at work! At a friggin university! We're supposed to negate this kind of ill-logic....

We just switched to a new system not but 3 months ago - LOTS of glitches and problems....For the first few weeks they had a phone number you could call....Now everything except log-in issues have to be electronically submitted.....

And they wonder why I put facetious replies on my job description.....

What kills me is that you submit your emailed response, and they sent you a form-letter response that doesn't apply to your question. And it always ends with, "we're glad we could fix it for you. If you have another problem, submit a NEW clarification ticket!" Which dumps into a new flow-chart, and no one ever spots your problem, because 10,000 tickets all got "solved."

Until the day when some poor, beleagured student/customer/mark is driven beyond the mountains of madness and decides to go

"E-POSTAL"

on their reptilian shapeshifting A$$e$! And we aren't talking mere hacking here--we're talking an Electromagnetic Pulse that would make it so that not even a toaster will stir in the greater Cleveland area until replacement consumer junk is airlifted in by a joint effort of the Air National Guard and Target.

See, if you don't ever let people 'rock the boat,' eventually someone gets fed up and decides to capsize it!

Take that, you techno-information-system robber barons!