You and me, baby, aint nothin but mammals...

Just poppin' in to say as a 40+ virgin guy who's also somewhat asexual, I have never actually wanted sex from anyone. I don't think about having sex with a woman when I like her, or see one that I find to be attractive to me. I actually think of myself spending time and laughing with her. Maybe kissing or snuggling and sharing a lifetime. I love the idea of having children and being a great Dad to them. I never think of intimacy when I see a person OR in my private fantasies.

So, it's not true with every guy is all I'm saying.

originally posted by: 8fl0z


Now im a guy, and my fellow males reading this will know where im coming from - we do NOT take interest in a woman unless we want to have sex with them. We cant help it! What dont these women understand?

Well...I wasn't aware you spoke for me. Well done good sir. But if I may...not a chance sonny. Women ARE attractive...and I don't mind admitting that I notice but that's the stop. Even before I was married I have these two friends J and H. Friggin beautiful as all get out....not interested in having sex with them. Hate to break it to you but yes we DO take interest in women without considering what it'd feel like being 'with' them.

I hate how women act like sex is such a horrible thing, how we have to lie about it when trying to attract a mate, act like sex doesnt matter, like we dont think about it every 30 seconds. How can we deny nature? ...but theres always gonna be that urge deep down inside of every man that makes them wanna rip those panties off and charge the red sea

This is disgusting...plain disgusting...go ahead and run around saying I am "selling my gender out" or that I am "lying just to look good to women"

Let me save you the typing....no....don't even start

Sex being a horrible thing? Well I can't judge for women...I am not them. Ever consider the history of the individual woman? Maybe she's been hurt by an ex, assaulted...something that you don't consider because as you put it, you just want to "rip those panties off"

Now for the first part...

You have to "lie" to get to women? Have you ever considered you are the problem? So what I am gathering here is a woman is approached by you...you are lying to make sure you get your conquest?

And no not every guy thinks about sex every thirty seconds

www.bbc.com... ex

Wow....this is disgusting...I don't give a crap what anyone else says

Sorry I forgot that women, my partner included, owe me what I want, when I want, and how I want...phew...good to get that figured out

I am a woman. I am intelligent and fun to hang out with. I am deep and loving. I am 29 and would like to get married some day to a man I love and have children with him. The only man I ever loved apparently did not love me in the same way. I've never met anyone besides him that I wanted to marry. Basically all the guys I've met through the years who wanted me, wanted me because they wanted to have sex with me. They did not want me for companionship. There were a few who actually saw me for me, but I did not love them.

Men like you, who are just out there looking to bang, get in the way of what most women desire in life and what most are looking for. You disregard what most woman want in life, their motivations for dating in the first place. I can only speak for myself, but what I want for my life involves a great deal more than sex. That is the absolute truth, despite what you may think.

Honestly, your rant repulses me. But I don't expect you to understand.

a reply to: 8fl0z
 Pal, you have a lot to learn about the opposite sex. If you read ATS, you are not a moron, probably just a horny, young guy in need of guidance. 
So I am going to suggest a few things for you to Google and read.

Chivalry

Manners

Confidence

A Guide To Being A Southern Gentleman
By Jack Cazir  

When you have mastered the above material you may possibly be ready to speak to a lady.
 Now remember the most important part. Be confident and don't try to hard, like children and puppy's, women are drawn to men with a good heart. 

I only did those dating websites to get laid. It usually worked. It's a good place to practice your dating skills and flirting techniques. I always made it clear that sexual attraction was just as important as having the same things in common. The girl I am currently seeing, is flattered that I fancy the pants off her, she wouldn't want it any other way, she's got a great personality too, but if I didn't fancy her we could only be friends. I have enough of those already

originally posted by: gottaknow
Just poppin' in to say as a 40+ virgin guy who's also somewhat asexual, I have never actually wanted sex from anyone. I don't think about having sex with a woman when I like her, or see one that I find to be attractive to me. I actually think of myself spending time and laughing with her. Maybe kissing or snuggling and sharing a lifetime. I love the idea of having children and being a great Dad to them. I never think of intimacy when I see a person OR in my private fantasies.

So, it's not true with every guy is all I'm saying.

Gotta get out there and shake your stick man

originally posted by: gottaknow
Just poppin' in to say as a 40+ virgin guy who's also somewhat asexual, I have never actually wanted sex from anyone. I don't think about having sex with a woman when I like her, or see one that I find to be attractive to me. I actually think of myself spending time and laughing with her. Maybe kissing or snuggling and sharing a lifetime. I love the idea of having children and being a great Dad to them. I never think of intimacy when I see a person OR in my private fantasies.

So, it's not true with every guy is all I'm saying.

You are missing out on a lot of life.

originally posted by: 8fl0z
Now im a guy, and my fellow males reading this will know where im coming from - we do NOT take interest in a woman unless we want to have sex with them.

Speak for yourself. I'm also a guy, and this is bullsh*t.

originally posted by: BelowLowAnnouncement
a reply to: Kangaruex4Ewe

That's how it should be. No games. No BS.

The problem with the mentality of this thread is that the guy wants sex and nothing else so it seems. So, dude, find a nice prostitute?

He fails to display any depth that a normal--can I say "decent, self-respecting" woman would look for in a mate. Basically, he thinks only of his own biological needs and not at all of the natural instincts of the female side. As an old gent, I can tell you, he can find plenty of the type of gal that he wants, but she will leave him suffering as she will be as shallow in feelings as he is. I hope he finds her.

a reply to: 8fl0z

Good post,

Your honesty does indicate however your age in regards to sexuality. Not that there is anything wrong with sex, or the wanting of it but I remember reaching a point at my age now where sex actually has become less important in terms of relationships.

Now don't get me wrong, my voracity has tempered little only leaving me just below the sex addict category. That being said however whenever I'm with someone, and things become more serious, I'm not ashamed to be honest about where sexuality stands in the relationship (in my view), and how important it is in terms of keeping a relationship happy and stable. If the other person can agree and feels similarly, then it's a good indication were on the same page, if not then were not.

It's not the end all be all for relationships because if I just wanted pleasure I'd go to a bar or a dating website, as I've found from others experiences on dating websites that it's pretty much a hook up type of situation when you meet up with these people.

In conclusion to sort out this mixed bag of thoughts, your not wrong IMO with the statements you've made but there will surely come a time when you begin to feel differently.

a reply to: 8fl0z

with an attitude like that, im surprised rosie palmer still talks to you.

im sure you wont have a problem finding a suitable partner at the local farm.

a reply to: Night Star

I dont just want sex - i do want a relationship, BUT i cannot deny my own primal urges.

Guys my age dont usually take interest in a girl unless we want to give her the D from the get go. Thats just how it is.

If i wanted a hooker - id get on craigslist lol

originally posted by: 8fl0z
a reply to: Night Star

I dont just want sex - i do want a relationship, BUT i cannot deny my own primal urges.

Guys my age dont usually take interest in a girl unless we want to give her the D from the get go. Thats just how it is.

If i wanted a hooker - id get on craigslist lol

you hang out with a lot of shallow people apparently.

and prioritizing sex over personality. wow. no wonder you have difficulties.

I hear you, man. I moved to where I am now a couple of years ago and don't really get out much to meet someone so I go to dating sites. It irks me when I see all the ones where they aren't on there for a relationship. What's the point? It also gets me when they either don't put pics up at all or they put one up of a cat, dog, or something else other than an actual pic. Do they look that bad? Again, what's the point? How do they expect to find somebody like that? I usually report them for not having an actual pic. It might be a dick move but it annoys me. For the most part I haven't had much luck. It sounds like you haven't either.

a reply to: TzarChasm

75% of you people who have replied have completely missed the point.

How do i put this any simpler...

Im not a misogynist, im not out here just for sex - i would LOVE to have a real relationship with a woman, but i am also a 19 year old male. OF COURSE I WANT TO HAVE SEX, last time i checked i had a brain that generates hormones, and two testes. How am i supposed to be attracted to a womans personality when i dont even know her? There HAS to be some sort of physical attraction between us in order for me to take interest in my current case. Like i stated before - my school is a total mast fest, there are 3 women old enough to be my mom, and the other two females there, i have ZERO physical attraction to - and we obviously share some common interests - our school is a very specialized tech school - we are learning to become aircraft mechanics.

I am in a new city, thousands of miles away from my friends and family - im not old enough, nor do i care for hitting bars and clubs to find girls. Im just not that type of guy, i am a true introvert. My idea of fun is going to the local airport and watching planes take off and land lol. Not many girls there...

BTW if we are going for personal attacks now - you are a #

a reply to: 8fl0z

Ok...missed the point?

BTW I am totally calm and rational lest anyone suggest otherwise

This wasn't about missing the point. Reread what you wrote in your OP. It cam out literally as you were looking for one singular goal. You specifically said...

we do NOT take interest in a woman unless we want to have sex with them. We cant help it! What dont these women understand?

You made a point to accentuate the NOT and then followed up by basically blaming women for not getting that this is how it works.

You followed with...

but theres always gonna be that urge deep down inside of every man that makes them wanna rip those panties off and charge the red sea

What were other supposed to take from this other than men are supposed to be on a conquest, and said conquest's goal was inside her pants?

Don't get me wrong, I have a LONG history of misrepresenting myself in words but taking what you said directly was not much of missing the point so much as the point you made seemed relatively clear. Because again in OP you said you are NOT interested in a woman unless you want to have sex with them, then backtrack to say, well yes sex is important, but relationship too. Take it from me ((as I misstate myself hundreds of times)), if your original point was supposed to be this new post, that is what it should have said

As for the OP's context itself, now that you have clarified, yes I do enjoy sex. Been married for 12 years. And yes there is often some manner of physical attraction that gets your eye moving in his/her direction in the first place. And even though I am married, yeah I do see men and women that for a glance I think "wow...."

My entire point ((and I promise this isn't an attack or insult)) is that if you are looking for a relationship to last, somewhere internally you have to at least attempt to quell this idea of conquest. Yes sex is fun...no doubt there...but he, she, whoever anyone finds as a mate and wants a true relationship with must seek all sorts of levels to meet on

Either way...best of luck to you

a reply to: 8fl0z

Hate to say it, but most women (gah, girls seeing as I'm talking about people my age) that are on dating sites are not looking for a one-night, they want someone to talk to.

And not all of us guys are just looking to have sex; My friend base is about 75% females, and there are quite a few single lookers in the lot. Do I want to bang them? Nope, because they're friends, friends I'd rather not lose ties with. I see them as friends, and nothing more than that.

Same for the profiles, I'm currently chatting with a couple people myself, and all they want to do is talk, have someone listen for a change, instead of immediately jumping to the chase. For me, this is fine, because I'm learning to keep conversations going, rather than being awkward or abrupt.

Just my three cents.
-fossilera

a reply to: 8fl0z

What they're telling you is that they might not want to have sex with YOU. They want to make it clear that talking to you doesn't imply that they're going to have sex with you. Your post makes clear why they feel the need to make their position clear. To you, they're all just interchangeable body parts. They understand that's your opinion. As a result, they're letting you know that they are going to make the decision and it's going to be contingent on your behavior in the meantime. Get it?