Ever feel like you're not where you belong?

I've browsed ATS for some time now, and decided to create an account and participate in some discussion. I have a tendency to allow my thoughts to get away from me, so if I ramble or go off on seemingly unrelated tangents I apologize. At the least I will attempt to keep it readable.

I'm not here for the political threads, the racism threads, or threads about how I would have handled an armed assailant with a simple Judy Chop to the neck.

There are certainly quite a few threads about the current state of the world, but I've always viewed ATS as a place to discuss things you might not discuss with your close friends and family for fear of looking like a whacko.

I'm here-
...for the mysterious.
...for the insane theories.
...for the crappy UFO videos.
...for the possibility of broadening my own view of this reality.

As for the title of this thread (and my username), I have always felt...out of place...it's a very difficult feeling to put into words. Maybe its just me, but I find it difficult to participate in day to day life without questioning why the hell we do the things we do...much of it seems unnatural to me. Most of my life has been spent moving and searching for the place I 'belong', but each journey ends the same way. I've always felt that I should have lived in the medieval period or something...a time when honor, respect, and concern for your fellow man meant more than the price of your shoes or which smartphone you have.

A few of my 'beliefs', in no particular order-

1. Life is not a random accident.
   
   
2. Science is not hellbent on disproving any God.
   
   
3. What we commonly refer to as 'God' or 'Gods' is/are separate from whatever created this reality. Meaning that while we (humans) may have been created by another life form, that life form is not the same entity which created the universe/our reality.
   
   
4. We have been to (and landed on) the moon. Some interesting evidence has been presented in attempts to discredit the mission, and I have no doubt NASA would be high on the list of letter agencies that would obscure the truth or flat out lie to the public. I'm open to the possibility that it was all a fraud, but I haven't been convinced so far. In fact it was a recent thread about the Van Allen radiation belt that caused me to finally join ATS.
   
   
5. Something/Someone is actively ensuring that we are in a constant state of unrest. Why? Not so sure...
   
   
6. The education system in the US is severely broken. We teach kids to memorize 'facts' like dates and names or multiplication charts, but there is little emphasis on real life skills such as problem solving and critical thinking. Obviously that is a blanket statement and there are certainly programs which counter my claim. I personally was lucky enough to have classes in my schooling devoted to problem solving and critical thinking, my school called these classes the "Gifted Program". However, as a whole I see the current education system here as broken.
   
   
7. Since I was very young I felt as though I am 'controlling' this body from somewhere else. I have a weird experience that I may share in a thread some day...short version included after the list. I've read a little about the simulation hypothesis and while a good chunk of the ideas are beyond my current understanding, the main premise resonates with my experience.
   
   
8. There is more to existence than just the life we live here on Earth. Is there a heaven/hell? Unlikely, in my opinion. Is there 'life' after our death here on this plane? Very likely, in my opinion. As I see things, the life we live here on Earth would be pointless if there is nothing to come afterwards. There is something to learn from every experience, and what's the point of learning if the knowledge cannot be applied?
   
   
9. There is life outside of Earth. What is it/are they? No clue. There are countless ancient tales of beings not-from-this-world, whether that world is another planet or another dimension isn't clear to me. If this reality is some sort of simulation/holographic interface, it would be possible that the universe (more specifically Earth) was indeed created (coded?) just for us, and the universe is a cold lonely place. However, I don't believe that is the case. Call it intuition, call it wishful thinking, call it what you will.
   
   
10. I believe in some sort of God, but likely not one who has been written about in any text. I was raised in a family where the Christian faith was present but not in the forefront of daily operation. From a young age I saw my family's beliefs as flawed yet harmless. Their brand of Christianity is one that results in good deeds without the judgmental [[spellcheck is flagging 'judgemental'...interesting]] angle. They essentially calibrated my moral compass, and my Code of Conduct draws heavily from the Christian faith.
    

Sorry for the long introduction, and thank you to the author of this thread. I look forward to participating in some discussions, especially the mind bending ones. The thoughts I've shared here are barely scratching the surface.



The strange experience, for those who are interested:

When I was young (around 10) I would think something like "I'm just another person", sort of with the underlying tone that everyone experienced life just like I do and everyone was connected through experiencing the same things...if I concentrated on it hard enough, I would get this feeling similar to getting slightly light headed when you stand up too quickly. That would freak me out and I would get the jolt like you have when you wake from falling in a dream. I never got comfortable with the light feeling, so I never pushed through with the thought. I eventually stopped doing it and have lost the ability to get in that same state of mind...

geez....glad to see you get all of that off your chest.....oh...and welcome

Thanks for sharing all of that. You piqued my interest with your title as I have spent my entire life feeling like I don't belong.... I am well liked, and can generally fit in in just about any setting. But I do not feel like I belong. Anywhere. I always feel restless. The only time I feel some sense of peace is if I am doing something outdoorsy (hiking, just taking in the scenery, etc)
Good to know I am not totally alone in that! I see other people and they seem to just have it figured all out. Maybe I will eventually one day too.

This was posted quite a long time ago by some other guy here on ATS, but I had to copy it to my Notes, so I can use it later and ......I just can't find any better words myself.

This is it:

Do you feel different? An outcast who doesn't fit in with most other people. An individual with thought patterns that are out of the ordinary. Someone who is very self-critical and places unrealistic expectations on themselves. A person with too much time on their hands in this physical world, but not enough time to explore the metaphysical aspects of existence. You are physically lazy but mentally proactive.

While others concentrate on what they can see, you focus on what you can not. You feel in awe of others that you admire, but you dismiss these feelings when they are directed at yourself. Your priorities are not the same as "normal" people; you are not fussed over the same things as they are. You are full of wonder when you think about the universe and other people, but feel empty and anxious when you look at yourself.

Others tell you that you are smart, but you feel silly. It's the tasks that most people find easy that you tend to struggle with. You ask yourself why you find tasks that are automated for most others so difficult. You feel as though life is just one challenge after another. You don't congratulate yourself enough when you do overcome a hurdle. But you take joy in telling others when they do. You love to make other people happy and give them advice when they are in need, yet you don't heed the wisdom you expel. Are you a hypocrite? Perhaps that is one of the many flaws you see in yourself.

You view the world through an external perspective. While you are confident you are in touch with reality, you feel separated from it. When you are asked to define who you are or what you believe, you struggle to find the words. What is your passion? What is your drive? You are not sure of your ambitions or your purpose for being here. When asked if you could do any occupation and get paid the same no matter what you choose, you struggle to define what it is that makes you happy and complete. You do not know, nor do you claim to know. This makes you appear indecisive to the average person and contributes to your feelings of alienation.

Other people ask you where you see yourself in 10 years, you worry about where you see yourself in 10 days. You are not the same person you were yesterday. You don't just worry about the future, you focus on the past and are apprehensive about the present. Your life is a plethora of examination, analysis and interpretation. You feel like you don't belong, yet you long to be. If only conversations in your head counted as social interaction with others, you would be the social butterfly that society expects of you.

--
anyway, welcome and thanks for sharing mate

a reply to: WrongRealm

I have always felt...out of place...it's a very difficult feeling to put into words. Maybe its just me, but I find it difficult to participate in day to day life without questioning why the hell we do the things we do…much of it seems unnatural to me.

Don't fret about not belonging somewhere because we don't. The spirit does not belong in the flesh. We have to endure here for a little while to learn that. Most people never question it, look how far ahead of the game you are.

You are right where you are supposed to be.

Welcome to ATS.

hello, welcome and , emphatically, yes. every single day.

5years old- on,blame the news and cultures that are worshipped.

I have always had the feeling I was supposed to be married to Natalie Portman

Could be wrong

a reply to: mwood

originally posted by: mwood
I have always had the feeling I was supposed to be married to Natalie Portman

Could be wrong

you like itty-tiny girls, don't ya?

a reply to: Necrose

original thread

Yea that's me, it's so accurate it is almost scary.

Anyway welcome to ATS!
You'll fit in here just fine and i see that as a good thing, after all..
There is no great genius without a mixture of madness.

My thought process has led me to the same ''beliefs'', i agree with all of them even though i don't really believe in any of it completely, i'd call it a hunch.

I also recognize that ''light headed'' feeling, i remember when i was young i would think about what it is that makes me.. me, and not something /someone else? What is it that decides which body we are born with? Do these questions even make any sense? And suddenly i'd get all confused but in a good way xD
It probably sounds nonsensical but i enjoyed these kinds of thoughts.. they allowed me to keep my sense of wonder even to this day and they are probably what led me to ATS.

Wonderful introduction!! Hello and welcome!!

a reply to: WrongRealm

Welcome aboard mate!