Soulmate lost... a true story

This is an accurate account... sadly

I have read much about soul-mates, soul-twins, etc... I met mine. I blew it.

I met her in 2009. Her name was Christina. Davis-Monthan AFB, she was a SSgt; me, a MSgt. I met her at a Wing level "Airman of the Quarter" board; we were both board members. When we met, she looked at me like she knew me. I knew immediately that we had met before, but could not put my finger on it. I was enchanted. Alas, she was wearing a wedding ring... my moral code said "no"...

I saw her many times after that... and she was always looking at me like we knew each other... and I always turned away.

I was in very dark place at that time in my life. I drank a lot. I wasn't very nice. I was infatuated with her, but knew I would ruin it. I felt as if she was my soul-mate, but feared I would screw it up. So, I shied away...

I tell you this, because I dream about her often. Why should such a brief encounter lead to such a longing? Why did I feel like we had met before? Why did she seem to stare right through me?

I searched for her, for awhile, until I started to feel like a creepy cyber stalker. I see it this way... if it is meant to be, we will meet again.

So.... SSgt Christina " " from Davis-Monthan AFB that sat on the Airman of the Quarter board, 3rd qtr of 2009... with the bright blue-eyes...

Seize the moment, my friends... you never know...

a reply to: madmac5150

So.... SSgt Christina " " from Davis-Monthan AFB that sat on the Airman of the Quarter board, 3rd qtr of 2009... with the bright blue-eyes...

What's up high-speed?

Have you tried all the regular social sites, including military reunion sites..?

Also, keep in mind, everyone has multiple 'soul mates', but since you probably don't travel the world on a regular basis, opportunities are missed.

Drive on......

a reply to: BestinShow

Seemed too creepy... I'll go with fate

you'll probably meet again someday
hopefully in better environment
good luck to both of you

a reply to: madmac5150

Good luck to ya, I know how you feel. I have dreams too from time to time.

I'm older...

Find her. Tell her...

You will soon be bumping uglies.

I feel good about this.

a reply to: madmac5150

I was recently in a situation where I had to walk away from someone I would certainly consider my true soul-mate, if such a thing exists. I'll do my best to stay short and sweet.

When I was much younger (high school) I was in a fairly popular band. The girl who did our artwork was the most amazing human being I had ever (and have ever) encountered. She was also (as far as I was concerned) irreconcilably out of my league. We talked daily for years. Without going into the sentimental details, we were like two peas in a pod and I was too much of a dweeb to tell her how awesome I thought she was. She pretty much felt the same way, but I had absolutely zero confidence in myself and thought I was just avoiding the inevitable rejection. We ended up drifting apart after I started dating another girl. I stopped talking to her for a lot of reasons, none of which make any sense now...

Fast forward about 10 years and I had broken up with the girl I was dating and moved back to my hometown for a bit while I got myself together and constructed a master plan of sorts. Turned out she had recently left her then husband, and was staying at her parents with her son...about 500 yards as the crow flies from where I was staying. We started to talk again, and decided to get together to catch up.

Long story short, I was in a horrible spot in my life. I had no desire to drag her down with my crap, and I told her exactly that. Even though she was deep in the process of a divorce, she had her life together. She worked at the same place for about 10 years, she owned her car, her son was happy and very well taken care of; she was doing great. I had just quit my (well paying) job, moved in with a friend, and had no idea what I was doing with myself. Eventually I decided to move north, while I was gone she got married and had another kid. I was devastated at first, but then I read a quote that completely changed my outlook on what a soul-mate might really be.

“Your problem is you don't understand what that word means. People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that's holding you back, the person who brings you to your attention so you can change your life. A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then they leave.”

Mine was sadly lost too. 7 years ago and I still live vicariously through his social media sites. I just can not let go.
We had the most amazing relationship and such a deep connection. When we first met, we too had one of those "ah ha" moments. And we were both speechless. We developed a great friendship which turned into a relationship a year later. And then he was gone as fast as he came into my life.
I ruined it. I was extremely emotionally immature. I have a bad habit of pushing good things out of my life.

Maybe in another life.

a reply to: madmac5150
It is very honorable for you to have respected the wedding ring. Yes, if it was destined and meant to be you will meet again.

Sometimes people just "know" each other. So strange isn't it...

a reply to: madmac5150

I really don't believe in the term "soul mate" but I just figure that you were as near compatible as two people could ever be....I don't like the term because I believe it can short change a person into thinking there is nobody better out there...you just have to find that next person and they could actually be a better fit...

I use to laugh at my wife's friend who always told her husband that he could never do any better than her...fast forward a few years and guess what, divorced and he did find someone better...a lot better....what was even more ridiculous is that he had was very well off with all the money...she got into the marriage with nothing...downside of the story is that they had children together...

Something I Heard On The Grape Vines About Soul Mates That Might Bring You Comfort Is Most Of The Time Our Soulmate Doesn't Incarnate With Us In This Life Time. This Happens Because That Other Being completes Us And Makes Us whole. And With Our Purpose Of Existence To Develop Ourselves Spiritually Them Being here Makes It Counter Productive To Our goals.

Who You More Than Likely Encountered Was A Soul Partner. Not Someone That Completes You But Someone Just As Important Because They Are Here To Teach You the Lessons That You Were Sent Here To Learn. This Person You Still Hold A Deep Connection With But They Are Just one Of ManyThat Is Here To Test And Challenge You So You Can Grow And learn About Yourself.

a reply to: EVOL88

That was put together really well and makes sense. I know I learned A LOT about myself after the other person and I parted ways. It forced me to really look at myself and fix myself. And ultimately, he is not someone I would have wanted to end up with anyway. The good parts and our connection we had, yes definitely.
Buuuuut I later found out that I was the other woman. And infidelity is not something I tolerate at all. Losing him was the most painful thing I've gone through in my life. And I've been through a lot! But it would have been more painful to have ended up in a relationship with him and deal with him and his deceit.

Seek her out man...

I would say that dreaming about her is a good sign, do it on purpose, incubate dreams to establish an emotional connection.

They say the physical realm and astral realm are related, as above so below. It is possible to meet her real consciousness in a dream(imo). Put in some dream work, and if you're lucky circumstances might just give you another chance.

Another reason for the possibility of you meeting her again is karmic, chances are that if you have lived a past life with this woman the two of you will have some karma to work on, if you never meet her again you won't get a chance to do something about that karma. Therefore chances are that circumstances will arrange for the two of you to meet. It might even be part of your destiny.

Maybe you think this type of thing is all hogwash. But don't lose hope, hang in there.

I wish you the best of luck and I really feel for you. Good luck, truly.

What is creepy is how much personal information you posted about her. If I was her I would track you down just to slap the piss out of you.

That said, I still feel for ya.

It's all just hormones.

originally posted by: ItCameFromOuterSpace
It's all just hormones.

If I were 14 years old, I would agree... I am decades beyond that. I have felt unrequited love before... this was so much different. It's hard to put in words. Haunting, really...

If you ever do search for her, respect that ring if it's still there, and also respect that she might not have felt that connection you felt.

Understand that if there is a ring there, there is also a family, and if you try to butt in, there may a lot of lives, including children, you will be disrupting for the worst even if it's good for you and even for her.

Be patient and wait. If it's meant to be, it will be, but let things take their own course.

a reply to: madmac5150

You got me with your story. I don't see noble much anymore.

I'm in my 40's now, and there have been a few people I've come across in my life that I knew immediately at a very deep level for no apparent reason whatsoever. I'd only just met them but I couldn't deny the feeling that not only had I known them before - they felt like... family. Why did I feel so relieved and happy and surprised to see them when our eyes met?

But it was always a little magical and mystical and just out of reach. I had the sad, but uncanny feeling that we weren't supposed to be together this time - and were just touching base.

I truly think our bodies are merely avatars for our souls, which are always connected with God. I think we're here to learn, or to teach or both - and I think we've been here before. The relationships and connections we made in other lives may have been so strong that we can't help but recognize them when we see them again.

But perhaps in order to grow in the right way, we can't always have them with us every single time. Maybe having them with us every time would stop us from growing because we'd be so dependent on them for our happiness that we wouldn't learn how to do things for ourselves.

I also think that's why God doesn't intervene more, and lets bad things happen. He knows that we're actually all safe with him, and that we can get do-overs. He wants us to get it right, so he gives us lots of chances if we want them.

And since you had that connection with her, to me that means that not only were you here before, but God saw you worthy of another chance to get even better this time.

I wouldn't second guess myself if I were you. You showed that even though you felt this enormously strong connection with your blue-eyed beauty, and you were low, and not in a good place, and probably really needed to feel that love and warmth that you knew you would find in her - you respected her and her marriage enough and were unselfish enough to not pursue it.

Like I said - I don't see noble much anymore. Keep your chin up - you're a good man. You'll find the one you're supposed to be with this time.

a reply to: madmac5150

Soulmates do not necessarily have a happy ending story, unlike the bull# fairy tales Disney stories we have been brought up with. I think I had a similar story with a girl, I met her with her boyfriend while travelling a few years back and we were travelling together for some time, and she looked at me the same way, with a soul-penetrating stare. I was speechless as well and we had really awkward moments because we felt this otherworldly connection while she was in a relationship (and a bad one i'll might add lol, they fought so many times).

In the end I believe that whatever we experience is exactly the right thing for us, even if it goes against our will, which is probably the hardest thing to accept. Because we LOVE regretting and asking "what if" questions.

You are on the right path friend, breathe deeply and appreciate what you have. You might be missing something right now which is already there and you will regret on it later.

this all sounds like classic soul connection stuff to me( been through it 3 times)


steve gunn, fiona beck, victoria zaitz and lovely luna and jean green all touch on the experience in many articles on their respective websites